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Player Meltdown; Input Requested
- Thread starter Keeper of Secrets
- Start date
Keeper of Secrets
First Post
talien said:
That is an excellent question all things considered. He expressed an interest in doing the same kinds of things the others were doing. There is a lot of romance and intrigue in my supers game. He told me he wanted to do what the others were doing. I tried it with him with were apparently disastrous results.
Peni Griffin
First Post
If he doesn't show up at today's game, call him. Even if you only talk to his girlfriend, he needs to know you kept trying.
The frequent changes of character may not be him "not being happy in the game." They may be a sign that he's been feeling something coming on, and in an attempt to deny it, he projected the problems into the character. This led him to behave as though changing the character could solve the problem.
This is me storymaking. You may never understand what was going on with him. It's not important that you do. Nor is there a "right thing" that you "ought to do." What's important is that you behave like his friend. Anything you do that is supportive and accepting will be better than doing nothing.
The frequent changes of character may not be him "not being happy in the game." They may be a sign that he's been feeling something coming on, and in an attempt to deny it, he projected the problems into the character. This led him to behave as though changing the character could solve the problem.
This is me storymaking. You may never understand what was going on with him. It's not important that you do. Nor is there a "right thing" that you "ought to do." What's important is that you behave like his friend. Anything you do that is supportive and accepting will be better than doing nothing.
Last edited:
Herobizkit
Adventurer
Easy answer: He stops being an occult expert.
Many people (and characters) go through several jobs in their lifetime. If he is content with his character at large, but doesn't enjoy the occustist angle, have him swear off studying the occult and pursuing a new line of work. I realize Mutants and Masterminds works a lot differently than your standard D&D, so "multi-classing" is much more difficult. How about this:
The character, after having been exposed to Lovecraftian craziness, petitions the "powers that be" to erase the memory of all that he has learned. Mechanically, this allows his to buy back the points he spent on occultism and beings his life anew with a new trade. Happens in TV all the time... why not RPGs?
Hard answer: I'm REALLY out on a limb here, but maybe the problem isn't with the gf, it's the occultism. Perhaps EVEN the gf is hardcore religious and now, finding out that her bf pretends to be a demonologist et al, has laid the hammer down on his character concept. "Either you stop playing that EVIL game, or we're through!" Perhaps he's having a personal crisis of faith. Bottom line -- it's a game, and nothing is written in stone.
Many people (and characters) go through several jobs in their lifetime. If he is content with his character at large, but doesn't enjoy the occustist angle, have him swear off studying the occult and pursuing a new line of work. I realize Mutants and Masterminds works a lot differently than your standard D&D, so "multi-classing" is much more difficult. How about this:
The character, after having been exposed to Lovecraftian craziness, petitions the "powers that be" to erase the memory of all that he has learned. Mechanically, this allows his to buy back the points he spent on occultism and beings his life anew with a new trade. Happens in TV all the time... why not RPGs?
Hard answer: I'm REALLY out on a limb here, but maybe the problem isn't with the gf, it's the occultism. Perhaps EVEN the gf is hardcore religious and now, finding out that her bf pretends to be a demonologist et al, has laid the hammer down on his character concept. "Either you stop playing that EVIL game, or we're through!" Perhaps he's having a personal crisis of faith. Bottom line -- it's a game, and nothing is written in stone.
SHARK
First Post
Greetings!
Hey, Keeper! Yeah, buddy, he sounds like a decent friend. Just stick by him, and support him in getting whatever help he needs. The game can wait. The game is just that--a *game*.
Now, when it comes time to play with your friend again--yeah, have his character change to another class, or you can have him make up a new character entirely. Have the occultist character go someplace to "retire" in solitude and peace...he has been devastated by the dark studies, what have you. In the game, that can work out fine, too.
Cheers my friend!
Semper Fidelis,
SHARK
Hey, Keeper! Yeah, buddy, he sounds like a decent friend. Just stick by him, and support him in getting whatever help he needs. The game can wait. The game is just that--a *game*.
Now, when it comes time to play with your friend again--yeah, have his character change to another class, or you can have him make up a new character entirely. Have the occultist character go someplace to "retire" in solitude and peace...he has been devastated by the dark studies, what have you. In the game, that can work out fine, too.
Cheers my friend!
Semper Fidelis,
SHARK
TheAuldGrump
First Post
I hope he recovers - he does not sound like a deliberately disruptive player, just one who is going through some problems. I wouldn't kick him out of the game. Ask if he wants a different character, or if he wants to sit things out for a few weeks - with the understanding that he is welcome back.
The Auld Grump
The Auld Grump
Keeper of Secrets
First Post
An extremely disturbing update . . .
Today before D&D started I politely asked him to join me outside for a beer. He does not drink but I do and after our conversation, I needed another.
I asked him if there was a problem during the supers game and he proceeded to tell me that he problem was with him and a bad day he had, To wit he admitted the following:
He got out ten minutes late from work.
He was delayed on I 75.
KFC was out of popcorn chicken and had screwed up his order.
I sat there, nodding patiently wondering when the bombshell would drop, informing me of why he had made such a display during the game. That was pretty much it. He said he did not like romance situations but at the same time did not want me to stop trying with him (?)
Further, I asked him if he needed a break but he told me he did not think that was the problem he would get back to me when I got back from GenCon.
I have some conflicted feelings. I sort of feel like he was crying wolf that night because his excuses seem somewhat, well, lame. But I held my tongue, wondering if the problem was deeper.
Today before D&D started I politely asked him to join me outside for a beer. He does not drink but I do and after our conversation, I needed another.
I asked him if there was a problem during the supers game and he proceeded to tell me that he problem was with him and a bad day he had, To wit he admitted the following:
He got out ten minutes late from work.
He was delayed on I 75.
KFC was out of popcorn chicken and had screwed up his order.
I sat there, nodding patiently wondering when the bombshell would drop, informing me of why he had made such a display during the game. That was pretty much it. He said he did not like romance situations but at the same time did not want me to stop trying with him (?)
Further, I asked him if he needed a break but he told me he did not think that was the problem he would get back to me when I got back from GenCon.
I have some conflicted feelings. I sort of feel like he was crying wolf that night because his excuses seem somewhat, well, lame. But I held my tongue, wondering if the problem was deeper.
The problem may very well be deeper than that. It also may be that that alone is all it takes to set him off. Or perhaps he underestimates the effect of a really bad day of work on his psyche. Maybe the things he described were the straws that broke the camel's back, and things had been building up for much longer than that day. Or maybe he was crying wolf. Unless you're a trained therapist, et al., you can't really say. First thing I'd do is make sure the fact that the romance is nonexistent is known (if not already). Make a mental note (or more permanent one if needed) to never introduce a romantic interest to this player again. One thing that makes me willing to give a person like this a chance is that it never seemed from your descriptions that he was intentionally disrupting the game.
Sounds like the guy needs a friend more then anything else.
He might have gone (or is going) through something that was rather trying to him.
If I were you I would talk to him, do not tell him to "get help," but rather be a friend and listen to what he was experiencing during that campaign.
Maybe your group is to harsh, and uncaring (I have no clue how your group treats its members), but if there is a lot of insults and harshness flying about the table (even in jest, and friendship) it could put someone with issues on edge. By what you have written I can't say, but I feel I can say and strongly suggest this- go to him, be kind, be careful, and be aware that this guy needs a supportive friend with an ear and a shoulder.
Good luck, hope you can help him.
He might have gone (or is going) through something that was rather trying to him.
If I were you I would talk to him, do not tell him to "get help," but rather be a friend and listen to what he was experiencing during that campaign.
Maybe your group is to harsh, and uncaring (I have no clue how your group treats its members), but if there is a lot of insults and harshness flying about the table (even in jest, and friendship) it could put someone with issues on edge. By what you have written I can't say, but I feel I can say and strongly suggest this- go to him, be kind, be careful, and be aware that this guy needs a supportive friend with an ear and a shoulder.
Good luck, hope you can help him.
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