I didn't assume that, I said it happens that way more often than not (which has been the case in my experience). But players initiating rolls on their own is still disruptive, even if they do describe their actions in terms of goals and approaches, for the reasons I already stated.
But in two of those three situations there was no roll necessary to determine the result. The dice are there to resolve actions with uncertain outcomes. If there is no uncertainty, than rolling the dice only interrupts the narrative flow of the game.
It's the player's approach, not the circumstances, which determine the Attribute that governs the task and what Proficiencies are applicable. For example, if the player had said, "I pretend to be drunk and bump into the guy, grabbing his coin purse in the exchange," I'd probably call that Dexterity (Deception). But I wouldn't know that the task required Deception before the player described what they were doing. You can see how that might cause problems if the player told me the result of their Sleight of Hand check in the same breath as they described an action that would be better resolved with Deception.
I didn't say having players on the same page is counter to my process as a GM, I said it isn't conducive to my process. For the purposes of resolving a roll, it doesn't really matter to me whether the player is on the same page as me regarding what the Skills and Attributes are for or not.
Sure, I agree with you on that. That's why, for example, I point out to players who haven't played in my games before that I run the Perception/Investigation split a little differently than most DMs do (specifically, I think most GMs tend to use Investigation for active searching and Perception for indirectly noticing things, whereas I use Perception for noticing sensory details and Investigation for interpreting information - for example, Perception will tell you there's a draft coming from the wall, Investigation will tell you that it could be coming from the seam in a secret door.)
My process has nothing to do with maintaining control or lack of trust of my players and everything to do with insuring the game flows as smoothly as possible. Cutting down on unnecessary dice rolls. Keep the focus on what is occuring in the fiction of the game world, instead of on numbers and "checks."
First bold - that is at best a feeling not an axiom. to me a player rolling a dice and telling a result as he describes his action is not disruptive at all. its efficient. "i rolled a 17" is not less "gamey" or more "gamey" than " i go over to the bar and try and lift his purse."
Second bold - Sorry but, yes, and this is something i have said several times - if a player if experienced with the system and your game enough to have a good reason to know what the check requires - thats what i am referring to.
In my experience a player who does not know what should be rolled tends to ask more often than not or just describes and waits. The more experienced played will *if* they believe they know the check required for their description - go ahead and make the rolls (in my games and some others i have seen.)
Is it possible that the player can err? Sure. But so can the Gm.
Ok sure, not going to quibble over conducive counter and 50 shades of thesauri but for me and my games - me and the player being on the same page as to what skill and check applies IN PLAY in actual session is vital. that should be fed by the chargen and past experience but if in actual play the player and i have differing views on it, thats to me a major issue - assuming not some mystery surprise element cooking the books by turning it into a special case.
Like say, if a Gm tells me in play when it matters my insight check determines whether or not i hide my feeling as opposed to my deception skill. That "not on same page" would nother me greatly - likely only for a short time tho. of course, i would deal with it after session where possible.