/snip
As for the words I've chosen being offensive, let's try to defend an approach that says, essentially, "MY fun is based in large part on the thoughts in YOUR head, regardless of the reasonableness of your actions in the context of the fiction, and it's YOUR responsibility to make sure *I* am not suspicious of YOUR motives." I don't think that can be defended outside of "We just like it." Which is all well and good - like I said, people should play how they want to play - but let's not pretend it's not about thought crimes and abdication of personal responsibility. Use different words, if you like, but I think we'll arrive at the same place.