Quieting a chatterbox

[Ostler]

A high level campaign that I DM'd for about two years has been on hiatius since my son was born six months ago. We have resumed other campaigns and my players are anxious to restart this one as well. I have been putting them off because there is a situation with a player that I find intolerable, but I don't know how to get around it.

She is the wife of one of the other players and only games for socialization. She has not bothered to learn the rules and never has any idea what her characters can do, but will argue with anyone who tries to help her (usually her husband, which is awkward for everyone else). She is also constantly chattering about out of game things, mostly to my wife who then misses out on important details. She is the type of person who tends to monopolize any conversation she is near and is always right.

She now wants to play a spellcaster in my now epic level campaign. I don't feel that we can exclude her because her husband is a good friend and really enjoys gaming. He realizes this is a problem and has tried to talk with her about it. We have tried to drop hints during the game that we need to get back on task and have outright ignored her, but nothing seems to help. No one really wants to hurt her feelings, but her constant chatter and ignorance of the game system detract from everyone's experience.

Any suggestions?

 

[Nightfall]

Tie her down, ducktape her mouth, but let her be able to write notes.

Okay I'm just channelling BoVD.

 

[Cbas10]

I can tell that you are far nicer and more polite than I am when running a game. I'm just straight out and blunt about it. I am fair, give warnings, and even will comprimise with a cigarette break if someone wants to talk about something for a few minutes. However, if someone wants to be in one of my games and play a scenario or campaign that I put some effort into, the least they can do is respect me by not disrupting the game. I'm more than happy to go to the bar and socialize with people over a beer; I love to sit around the FLGS and gossip for hours; I will even have breaks from my games to chill out and relax for as long as the players want. However, when I run a game, I only want to be surrounded by people who want to be INVOLVED in my game.

Next time she starts talking with anyone, make sure to fart, belch, and scratch every hidden part of your body while standing between her and the person she is talking with. Then get a deer-in-the-headlights expression with no verbal reply when she gets irritated. Follow that up with the question, "Why is this not acceptible when it is supposedly acceptible to be just as rude by constantly interrupting my conversations with (however many are in your group) people at the same time?" Belch again; then continue, "By the way. Read the stupid book; it's not rocket science."

 

[hong]

Tell her that she's being disruptive, and ask her to stop. If she doesn't stop, ask her to leave the game, because she's spoiling the fun for everyone else. Don't be rude or insulting or try to drop "hints"; these will just make her annoyed and defensive, if she wasn't that way already. Annoyed and defensive people are not likely to do what you hope they'll do, and if anything, it may place your out-of-game relationship with the couple at risk. Just be honest. If despite all this she gets insulted anyway and breaks off the friendship, she wasn't really a friend in the first place.

 

[Mista Collins]

Cbas10 - you have just gone to the signature.

As for the solution to the problem, I don't know the answer. I just had the same problem start to come up when a new gamer joined our group (too bad she is the gf of one of the guys). But she has been around for two sessions. Maybe it will stop once all the polite "nice to meet you" conversational pieces are gone.

 

[Tallok]

I don't mind some ot chatter during my games, but if I need to get it on topic, yardsticks are mighty nice, but that probably won't work too well for you. Definetely try talking to her yourself, and tell her that she needs to stop or she can't play.

 

[Ostler]

Tie her down, ducktape her mouth, but let her be able to write notes.

Tempting....very tempting...

 

[Cavalorn]

Just assume that everything she says is matched by an equivalent amount of burble for her character and go by the rule that more than six seconds of speech is no longer a free action.

 

[CanadienneBacon]

What Hong said. Be direct, most people respect that and tend to react surprisingly favorably. You should also be prepared to lose both her and her husband as players though. IME, if the wife's unhappy with a social group, she tends to insist her husband follow suit.

 

[Si_RW]

have you tried to find a character that she can relate to that might help. other than that see if her husband notices this and see if he will take care of it.