Chaosmancer
Legend
So, I really need to vent about this, in part because I find it so absurd and weird, and in part because on of the guys seemed shocked that I've played with multiple groups of people. He seems to think my attitudes towards the game indicate I have never played with different groups before, and it has me wondering if despite what I know to be true, this really does look like I'm the one who was acting aberrantly.
I don't think any of them will see this, but this is more about my need to talk about this than anything else.
Our DM is kind of forcing us to play through Curse of Strahd, and it annoys me to a degree because we just came back from a long break, he gave us a quest to save an old companion, then forced us to deal with this other thing, then forced us into Barovia to fight Strahd, and we keep delaying saving the life of someone at least two members of our party considered a friend.
Even if some of the others said it didn't matter if she died because they don't care about her.
Part of forcing us into this came with the departure of one of the players due to RL issues. Incidentally the character he played was like the daughter of the group, we all doted on her and cared deeply for her because she was so innocent and naive. The mist of Barovia ripped out her soul and her body was possessed by a ghost and the only way to save her was to kill Strahd.
By the way, we ranged from level 11-13 and we had some insanely powerful items, from a meta perspective, Strahd even buffed was not a threat we couldn't handle.
To also add some history, we've been gaming for over a year, and we've had a lot of inter-party conflicts. My Gnome Cleric (who I would categorize as Lawful Good, because he was a doctor and a scholar) was at the center of most of them. Things like The Paladin destroying a shrine to my pantheon, the Dwarf shoving me into a pile of mysterious and possibly deadly ooze eggs after we got into a fight about whether or not we should destroy said ooze since it might be the thing we were sent to find, the Paladin enslaving a woman who didn't know she was undead.
After time I recommended patience and restraint I was labeled evil, worshiping devils, and betraying the party. No one wanted the group to break apart, but time and time again it was made clear that for my cleric to fit in with this party, he had to stop caring about the lives of others, the consequences of our actions, and really just be a door mat who does not object to anything.
Back to Barovia, we come to a mansion to talk to the noble who lives there. We knock and the woman inside says she won't open the door for the servants of the Devil (Strahd). Things get confusing pretty fast, I try and explain we aren't servants of Strahd, but before I can get a response the Wizard Barbarian casts Enlarge and breaks through the front of the house. I try to tell her to move back from the door, but I'm not fast enough.
The rogue, who generally was the only other decent person in the group, steps over her in the rubble and she attacks him. He stomps on her arm, she continues to struggle, and he kills her and begins to decapitate her. I tell him to stop, that we are going to far, he justifies it because she was standing in our way and attacked him for no reason. After all, he was stepping over her into her house, clearly he wasn't going to hurt her...... this is an argument I am seen to be in the wrong over. According to the party, the rogue may have overreacted a little, but was clearly justified and besides he is upset about our friend and how dare I try and slow us down from saving her, don't I care.
I cast hold person to stop him, and begin casting Raise Dead to bring this poor woman back from the dead. The dwarf attacks me from behind, I ignore him and continue casting the spell. He gets out of the hold person, tries to steal the head back, which doesn't work because I'm right there, holding it, casting the spell, and they continue into the house.
Incidentally as they try and steal everything in the house, finding nothing of value, and no one else alive. They don't learn anything.
During this time a strange nobleman walks into the house. Out of character, I know it is Strahd, but he ignores my cleric and continues to the top floors to kill the rogue. A fight breaks out, but not suspecting this nobleman to be a serious threat (we are seriously over-powered, we took on an army of devils just a few sessions ago) I continue what I was doing. They scream at me to stop him as he gets back on his horse, and I do throw a 7th level spell, but of course it doesn't stop him and I go back to what I am doing.
They finish exploring the house, the rogue tells me what I am doing is pointless because he's just going to kill this woman again, and I finally bring her back.
She tells us everything we want to know. She is terrified, broken from the death of her father, her fears about Strahd, and just generally a mess. I know the party isn't just going to leave, they are going to try and kill her again. So as we go to leave I begin casting sanctuary to protect her, right as the rogue goes to kill her again. The paladin gets involved by casting counter-spell on my sanctuary. She is murdered again, and really there isn't an explanation they give me, except that when they killed her the first time, Strahd came and attacked us, so clearly she is connected to him and therefore clearly she is evil... despite the very mention of his name causing her to curl up and freak out. Oh, also she is clearly soulless like those grey people outside... despite not being grey and I couldn't raise her from the dead if she didn't have a soul...
But clearly I am in the wrong.
Now, at this point, I will admit I should have done things differently. My character lost it, and attacked the group, and I told them. He isn't going to stop, I know he's going to die, we can just fast forward through this. I should have just had him leave, but having him leave such clearly depraved and evil individuals didn't make sense in the moment. Strahd returns again and fully kills the rogue while I'm bound and gagged on the ground, I break free and start casting my stuff right as they drop Strahd to 0 and he goes mist. Meta we discuss that I won't pursue them if they leave, so they do so, calling me a traitor and evil, yet again (seriously, they have been convinced I was evil ever since I killed an imp they were torturing ad wanted to keep as a pet, or the time I said we should let the stragglers of the lizard man army just leave, because killing 70 of them was enough. Clearly my plots of demonic influence ran deep). The dwarf throws a fireball with the explicit purpose of destroying the woman's corpse to the point I cannot revive her (I'm immune to fire and can cast resurrection... so pointless, but making his statement) and my character leaves the party.
They think I'm too rigid, that the person who says that's what my character would do is always at fault, because I am my character and therefore I should be more flexible and make it work. The party is more important, keeping the group together is more important, and I should be making concessions for their actions. Clearly this no-name NPC (we never bothered to ask her name since we killed her in the first 20 seconds of meeting her) was evil and blocking our path to saving our friend and how could I justify betraying the entire party instead of doing everything I could to find where strahd was and kill him.
Of course, we had no idea about his castle until the woman I brought back to life told us. Or that we should talk to the Vistani. And I could have helped with either Strahd fight, which wouldn't have happened because he did come to avenge his bride to be, if I hadn't been busy casting Raise Dead.
And, this idea that the party members are somehow a different class of person than the NPCs is one I reject. I don't draw that line, the NPCs are people in the world, they aren't soulless meat puppets we interact with, they matter just as much.
I just.... Am I really in the minority here? Is this really such a strange thing that my Lawful Good Cleric is not able to stand cold-blooded murder? I mean, I was even willing to forgive the first time she was murdered. It was the second that I couldn't stand because it was for no reason except they had killed her once before.
I even mentioned my new character would have to be more blood thirsty and evil to fit into the group, and they said I was crazy, that they aren't blood thirsty, after all they I can't name a different time we murdered someone in cold blood... not that we haven't caused destruction in a lot of different places.
I'm not crazy here, right?
I don't think any of them will see this, but this is more about my need to talk about this than anything else.
Our DM is kind of forcing us to play through Curse of Strahd, and it annoys me to a degree because we just came back from a long break, he gave us a quest to save an old companion, then forced us to deal with this other thing, then forced us into Barovia to fight Strahd, and we keep delaying saving the life of someone at least two members of our party considered a friend.
Even if some of the others said it didn't matter if she died because they don't care about her.
Part of forcing us into this came with the departure of one of the players due to RL issues. Incidentally the character he played was like the daughter of the group, we all doted on her and cared deeply for her because she was so innocent and naive. The mist of Barovia ripped out her soul and her body was possessed by a ghost and the only way to save her was to kill Strahd.
By the way, we ranged from level 11-13 and we had some insanely powerful items, from a meta perspective, Strahd even buffed was not a threat we couldn't handle.
To also add some history, we've been gaming for over a year, and we've had a lot of inter-party conflicts. My Gnome Cleric (who I would categorize as Lawful Good, because he was a doctor and a scholar) was at the center of most of them. Things like The Paladin destroying a shrine to my pantheon, the Dwarf shoving me into a pile of mysterious and possibly deadly ooze eggs after we got into a fight about whether or not we should destroy said ooze since it might be the thing we were sent to find, the Paladin enslaving a woman who didn't know she was undead.
After time I recommended patience and restraint I was labeled evil, worshiping devils, and betraying the party. No one wanted the group to break apart, but time and time again it was made clear that for my cleric to fit in with this party, he had to stop caring about the lives of others, the consequences of our actions, and really just be a door mat who does not object to anything.
Back to Barovia, we come to a mansion to talk to the noble who lives there. We knock and the woman inside says she won't open the door for the servants of the Devil (Strahd). Things get confusing pretty fast, I try and explain we aren't servants of Strahd, but before I can get a response the Wizard Barbarian casts Enlarge and breaks through the front of the house. I try to tell her to move back from the door, but I'm not fast enough.
The rogue, who generally was the only other decent person in the group, steps over her in the rubble and she attacks him. He stomps on her arm, she continues to struggle, and he kills her and begins to decapitate her. I tell him to stop, that we are going to far, he justifies it because she was standing in our way and attacked him for no reason. After all, he was stepping over her into her house, clearly he wasn't going to hurt her...... this is an argument I am seen to be in the wrong over. According to the party, the rogue may have overreacted a little, but was clearly justified and besides he is upset about our friend and how dare I try and slow us down from saving her, don't I care.
I cast hold person to stop him, and begin casting Raise Dead to bring this poor woman back from the dead. The dwarf attacks me from behind, I ignore him and continue casting the spell. He gets out of the hold person, tries to steal the head back, which doesn't work because I'm right there, holding it, casting the spell, and they continue into the house.
Incidentally as they try and steal everything in the house, finding nothing of value, and no one else alive. They don't learn anything.
During this time a strange nobleman walks into the house. Out of character, I know it is Strahd, but he ignores my cleric and continues to the top floors to kill the rogue. A fight breaks out, but not suspecting this nobleman to be a serious threat (we are seriously over-powered, we took on an army of devils just a few sessions ago) I continue what I was doing. They scream at me to stop him as he gets back on his horse, and I do throw a 7th level spell, but of course it doesn't stop him and I go back to what I am doing.
They finish exploring the house, the rogue tells me what I am doing is pointless because he's just going to kill this woman again, and I finally bring her back.
She tells us everything we want to know. She is terrified, broken from the death of her father, her fears about Strahd, and just generally a mess. I know the party isn't just going to leave, they are going to try and kill her again. So as we go to leave I begin casting sanctuary to protect her, right as the rogue goes to kill her again. The paladin gets involved by casting counter-spell on my sanctuary. She is murdered again, and really there isn't an explanation they give me, except that when they killed her the first time, Strahd came and attacked us, so clearly she is connected to him and therefore clearly she is evil... despite the very mention of his name causing her to curl up and freak out. Oh, also she is clearly soulless like those grey people outside... despite not being grey and I couldn't raise her from the dead if she didn't have a soul...
But clearly I am in the wrong.
Now, at this point, I will admit I should have done things differently. My character lost it, and attacked the group, and I told them. He isn't going to stop, I know he's going to die, we can just fast forward through this. I should have just had him leave, but having him leave such clearly depraved and evil individuals didn't make sense in the moment. Strahd returns again and fully kills the rogue while I'm bound and gagged on the ground, I break free and start casting my stuff right as they drop Strahd to 0 and he goes mist. Meta we discuss that I won't pursue them if they leave, so they do so, calling me a traitor and evil, yet again (seriously, they have been convinced I was evil ever since I killed an imp they were torturing ad wanted to keep as a pet, or the time I said we should let the stragglers of the lizard man army just leave, because killing 70 of them was enough. Clearly my plots of demonic influence ran deep). The dwarf throws a fireball with the explicit purpose of destroying the woman's corpse to the point I cannot revive her (I'm immune to fire and can cast resurrection... so pointless, but making his statement) and my character leaves the party.
They think I'm too rigid, that the person who says that's what my character would do is always at fault, because I am my character and therefore I should be more flexible and make it work. The party is more important, keeping the group together is more important, and I should be making concessions for their actions. Clearly this no-name NPC (we never bothered to ask her name since we killed her in the first 20 seconds of meeting her) was evil and blocking our path to saving our friend and how could I justify betraying the entire party instead of doing everything I could to find where strahd was and kill him.
Of course, we had no idea about his castle until the woman I brought back to life told us. Or that we should talk to the Vistani. And I could have helped with either Strahd fight, which wouldn't have happened because he did come to avenge his bride to be, if I hadn't been busy casting Raise Dead.
And, this idea that the party members are somehow a different class of person than the NPCs is one I reject. I don't draw that line, the NPCs are people in the world, they aren't soulless meat puppets we interact with, they matter just as much.
I just.... Am I really in the minority here? Is this really such a strange thing that my Lawful Good Cleric is not able to stand cold-blooded murder? I mean, I was even willing to forgive the first time she was murdered. It was the second that I couldn't stand because it was for no reason except they had killed her once before.
I even mentioned my new character would have to be more blood thirsty and evil to fit into the group, and they said I was crazy, that they aren't blood thirsty, after all they I can't name a different time we murdered someone in cold blood... not that we haven't caused destruction in a lot of different places.
I'm not crazy here, right?