Tickleberry's continuing adventures or "Killer Kobalds, from Where?"

[jasper]

Mr. Fred speaks

Hum. It appears that Killwin and his group is a little bit more powerful than I thought. I think I will fall back and make some plans.


DM NOTE.
Got some feedback from the group they hate Mr. Fred and want him dead. But they are tired of him popping in and out every game. So Mr. Fred will be taking a vacation till at least most of them hit tenth level.

 

[jasper]

Leonard was Tucker

Well with what happen I guess I need to make some things clear and confess.
First my name is Leonard but you know me as Tucker since with a little makeup I can pass for them, hey it helps. I am part of the Bagger gang of the Thieves Guild in Hartsford. Now the old fart of a leader Harry of Underhill did die of old age. None of Mr. Bilbo Bagger gang killed him and the Light fingers would not. Hey Lilybo was Harry’s lieutenant.
So last night we had a target of opportunity, I can’t believe he got stupid and fell for the trick, but Mr. Bilbo and Frodo Frenchy took Lilybo out. I was hoping to take out Tucker but I can’t.
But to continue the Light fingers went into hiding and holding up in the moneychanger shop. We should have kept a better eye on the traitor Tickleberry. The boss heard that she was arrested and sent Michael, one of new recruits, to keep an eye on the trial.

He came back too soon, but with good reason. Tickleberry was spilling the beans and Michael got out of there quick before she ratted him out. Mr. Bilbo called in everyone. I will introduce them. Grace was not able to make it in on time but he a nice guy with roguish flavor. Hardy was also not able to make in on time, he is a straight up fighter.

We had Michael and what’s his name in the look out positions but the traitor Tickleberry and town guards struck too quick. We had three runners ready but they didn’t help. Tickleberry who was not a necromancer struck too soon and too fast. But back to gang.
Sam the Wise is a mixed bagger. He a good fighter, a good thief, and learning the assassin trade from Mr. Bilbo. Swag our magic handler. Barney Bones a cleric and our combat medic boy did he mess up. Frodo Frenchy another triple threat, magic, thief and even a better assassin than Mr. Bilbo. And my boss Mr. Bilbo Bagger, a thief and assassin.

Yes Mr. Bilbo and Lilybo were discussing who would take over the head of guild but we play to win. The members were given a little over a month to decide on the next leader after Harry of Underhill died. You know not even the mayor or the rest of the council knew the head of thieves’ guild was sitting at the table. I guess it pays to have a good outlook on life. And that rule of members voting for leader was to go out the window when we took over.

If you had a clue by now, it was us killing off the members who in an informal poll, were going to give their vote to Lilybo. Bad answer, most of the fools thought that we would respect the rules. I lost count of the number of bodies we dumped into the river.

So there is the gang. I was happy to see Ms. Cleo go down before I bought it.

 

[jasper]

the Real Tucker speaks

Hi, I am Tucker of Tiny Town. Proud member of the light finger gang. We should have let her go. But we thought Tickleberry had information on Lilybo’s where about. He went missing and we went to mattress. We heard Tickleberry break in and knew she was good. I don’t know which of Bagger gang closed her escape route and threw the hold person on her but it was just like Bilbo’s group to be sneaky. I am a priest to lucky one. Too bad my luck has run out.

I heard someone had been playing around as me. We could not really question people openly so we let it stand. Leonard had told his side now it my turn. First in the standing on my far left is Wallace of Montgomery, a young mage and thief. Next the cute one who is our bait is Ms Bonny of Sherwood also a mage and thief with a little bit experience under her belt. Third Hosea of Greenwood fighter and thief and one of upcoming soon to be down and going. Fourth is our heavy hitter and two weapon fighter Nelson who wanted to become a lord. Fifth is Robin of Merry wood better thief than fighter but good in both fields. Sixth and just hanging around is Clyde of Horse Lane a sorcerer but he is not going to pull any rabbits out his hat. And being gagged means no last minute spell slinging.

The body to my right is Lilybo. Who was just getting his head together after that bad night in the wizard’s guild. He did not come back with the crown he was sent after and circumstances did not allow us another go at it. But why am I hanging around.
You would too after being turn out by the evil Tickleberry. But at least I heard she bought the farm. For those visitors in Hartsford they hang thieves. Even two plus days dead ones! Lilybo is ripe and I can see the Bagger gang is too.

We found Tickle berry just outside the shop. We were unable to really question her, as the watch was unusually efficient. But she did have one of Lilybo’s maps on her. So she was arrested and we showed up for court the next day.

Boy as Cleo of Beirhouse tired. First the attack on her husband in the middle of night and then being haul into court as witness and spell caster.

Tickleberry was crazy. She ASKED for Zone of Truth spells to cast. Her friend Ackmed was smooth. He was able to surprise the judge, Honorable Harry P. Stonebender, with his wit and talk. She was charged with possession of burglary tools, a lashing and fine offense, and possession of stolen goods, the map, and breaking and entering. Ackmed was able to talk Judge Harry out the breaking and entering by getting me to admit since not one of us saw her in the building we could not be sure she did. He got her a lashing for stolen goods because the map was recovered. And he was working on the burglary tools when Tickle berry went cuckoo!

She stands up in open court and confesses to being a rogue. Ackmed tries to get her shut up but the girl was on a roll. She confesses to having broken in, stole the map, and…

THEN ANNOUNCES TO THE WHOLE WORLD THAT THE THIEVES GUILD DOES EXIST.

She continues to confess that she knows where the hide out is and rats us out. I didn’t see Judge Stonebender motion but next thing I knew is all us Light fingers were being dog piled and chained. While that is happening, the judge grabs two patrols, Cleo and Steward of Beirhouse to raid the place. And suspends her sentence. Then orders her and her party to help with the raid. They went out the door in a flash!

Meanwhile the other priests are keeping up the truth spells. And the judge starts asking yes or no questions. And we were not allowed to stand mute. So we admit our guilty, especially after some body parts are subject to indignities!

Well that my side.

Ack!
Such a long fall for a short halfling……..

 

[jasper]

the honorable judge harry p. stonebender

I am the Honorable Judge Harry P. Stonebender. Lawbreakers hate me. I sentence them to lash, fine, and to die if the crime calls for it.

September 28,10017 was a good day. The day the town destroyed the thieves’ guild. Now we knew one existed but we could not prove it the cute Tickleberry took care of it.

After dealing with the rioters I took Tickle berry’s case. Young thing was charged with breaking and enter which is a fine and lashing. Also thief and possession of stolen goods depending on the case she could have hanged for that. And possession of unlicensed burglary tools again a fine and lashing. Now we do allow license trap makers to have in their tool kit burglary tools but we also have their names and they have to submit to the question every year and some times sooner.

Her friend Ackmed is going to make a great councilor some day. He was able to razzle-dazzle me and get most of charges dropped or just lashings. But Tickleberry went crazy! She confesses to her crimes under a zone of truth. And gave us information to the where about of the thieves’ guild, the location, and some of names. I motion to Stanley and he collected Lilybo’s friends. Since I saw some coming and going during the trail especially Michael who accused her of being a necromancer, I spend sentence on her and order her, her friends, the members of town guard I could put my hands then and there and Cleo and her husband to form a raiding party and go now. They left smartly under Lieutenant Al’s command.

While the raid was going on I put the Light fingers gang to the question. I was able to find out some of the bodies which have been turning up had been thieves. But none of the living members did the deed. It turn out a turf war was going on. Never did find out who started the rumors the town guard was behind the killings. But all the members of Light fingers gang are to been hung. Especially after the searches of their homes and moneychanger’s place.

I also hung the members of Bagger gang. Yes they were dead but the law requires their hanging a couple times over. They found Lilybo’s body in the hideout when the dust settled. I hung him also.

Unfortunately Tickleberry and most of the town guard died. Only Lieutenant Al, Lieutenant Barry, and Sergeant Harry survived. Some of the treasure recovered when to the adventurers; the rest went to city and survivors of dead watchmen.

Also the halfling Grace and the halfling Hardy are under a sentence of death. Hope a good mined town person find them.

I hear Ms. Cleo and Steward nearly died. And Ms. Cleo has offered to raise Tickleberry but I don’t know if it worked. But Tickleberry and her group were given citizenship and depending on how things work out, they may be able to lay claim to the criminals’ homes.

 

[Tickleberry]

Hah! Shows what YOU guys know!


I am the best at what I do, and you can't stop me!
It seems that the reports of my death are TERRIBLY exaggerated. Heh, heh, HEH! Well, things were coming to a head, so it was decided I should drop by and see what I could see at Lilybo's. (Why me?)

A carefully planned distraction carried out by the incomparable bard right next door to Lilybo's allowed me my time to check things out, and then it aall went wrong.

Lilybo is at best a second rate rogue. Noise traps? Easy trap doors? I almost think its too easy. I check through the chests, and get zapped a couple of times (the noise traps let me get too confident). But hey, what is a potion of cure light for anyway?
The map I find is REAL interesting. Maybe a clue to an unwarrented good deed? Maybe. Just maybe.

(note: I play my rogues as in it for the fun, but dm dropped clue it might be a further adventure hook, so I had to find a rationale.)

I head downstairs, and find PEOPLE. Time to duck out. Then the trap door closes, and then, as I go out an unoccupied bedroom window, I get hit by a hold person! Now the fat's in the fire!

These guys ask me where Lilybo is! Like I'd know? Oooh boy, now what? Just as these guys start to get physical, the guard shows up. First time I've ever been happy to see the clowns (first time they've ever saved ME, I usual save THEM). They haul me off to jail, and the characters I meet there! I thought they must have caught an entire carnival.

The crew shows up, and Ahmed is to be my counselor. Now, I recognize several of the "witnesses." I KNOW I won't have anything like a fair trial. So, I ask for a zone of truth. I have absolutely nothing to hide. (Well, I thought so, anyway.) Ahmed gives me such a looook. Was he planning on lying, too?

I see that there are several thieves in the crowd, and that someone starts that hideous rumor again about the necromancy. At least I can put paid to THAT old thing. You'd a thought I let a ferret loose in all their drawers. (Not a bad idea, gotta remember that one.)

So these guys start talking about lashings, and punishment for things I had absolutely no way of knowing were offenses. Registering? Illegal tools? Say WHAT? I ask for the rest of this farce to be carried out in Judge's chambers. No dice. (Like I should have expected sense from these men?) So I drop the big one on them. We infiltrated the thieves guild, and were trying to bring it down, and THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR RUINING MY COVER!

Okay, so now I'd let a DRAGON loose in the hen house.

We go in, and the fighting gets brutal. Now, I know my strong suit is NOT combat, so I hang in the protected middle, but they'd had time to prepare before I could mobilize the stupid boredocrats. ( I REALLY hate the "civilized" law structure, they have mice for brains. Look at the laws they pass!)

It seems like no time before the mid line becomes the front line, and the good guys are dropping. Some of the fatter ones go invisible, and sneak up on me, in the middle of combat. I'm really hurting, so I fake dead, and go down. Hah! Once the fighting is over (I'd seen Cleo go down, but she's up again, how?) I holler for a medic! Several surprised faces surround me wondering how I'm still alive, and believe me, I am too!

Things had gotten REAL interesting in that combat, but the final analysis was that I had survived, by the very skin of my teeth. The adventure continues!

 

[Tickleberry]

Then the NEXT day . . . .


The very next morning, bright and early, what should happen but somebody THUNDERS on the front door. I waited a whole ten minutes for somebody else (namely somebody who hadn't been grieviously injured) to answer the door, but nooo. I had to go down.

What do I find there but a GIANT. Okay, so he wasn't really a giant, but at 6'9" he sure seemed like it, especially when he's built like a mountain. I open up to see what the mountain man wanted. Did I mention the bright blazing red hair? Man's as redheaded as yours truly. Only difference was his eyes weren't as pretty a green as mine, more like a brownish hazel.

As soon as I opened the door he took a look at me and said "Where's Lilybo?" Now, Lilybo was hanging in the town square, quite dead, and was surely still being talked about. This guy obviously had to have walked, or ridden through quite a bit of town to get here, and he managed to hear NONe of it? Incredible. Despite the early hour and inconvience he had already caused, I tried to be polite.
"Lilybo is no longer with us."
"Where'd he go? Is he at his other house?" Mountain Red started looking around like I might be hiding him somewhere behind me. Okay, so he WAS as dumb as he looked. I took the gloves off.
"Lilybo is dead." Didn't seem to phase him. "Are y'all now running the business? Sign's still up. He was always good to me when I'd come through town. Sure he ain't hiding at the other house?"
"Celwyn!" I bellowed. Let the bard deal with the thickwit. I was going back to bed. It was too early to be alive and functioning.

Then here came the bard, perky as ever. "Good morning good sir, what can I do for you?"?

"Name's Ronco Betide, an' I was hopin' to get this rock changed out. Ol' Lilybo usually give me a good deal when I came through." Ronco pulled out a huge ruby. This had gotten my attention. Wait a minute. Ol' Mountain boy mentioned another house. This might be worth staying up for after all. Who knows what he had hidden at another house, and it would legally be ours now. Hmm. This had possibilities.

The bard did the unthinkable, he gave him a straight trade off. I gave him an odd look. Was he feeling well today? He later explained "I didn't loose anything, and we need another bruiser." After the last fight, I'd have to agree.

Then Celwyn looks around at all the moneychanger equipment just lying there. He got an odd look in his eye. One I recognized. He spent the rest of the day looking into it and setting it up. I looked into getting my goggles of nightvision. I designed them, and they weren't quite gogglish. Goggles always looked so goofy. I also found out more about this "other house".

Oh, did I mention that Celwyn also entered Ahmed in the town council race? Yeah, and set some insurance so that he gets a "fair" consideration. Let's say he became a very popular candidate (amazing what large amounts of alcohol can accomplish).

This other house was well back in the woods. It was quite a mansion. Whilst looking over the new property, something spooked the horses. We managed to keep our seat as a troll came up out of the ground beneath the new guy. Celwyn threw alchemal fire. Celwyn set Ronco's horse on fire. Ronco axed the troll. Ronco hurt the troll, badly. Celwyn again threw fire. Ronco's horse had enough, and ran off.
Within a few more axe blows, and some help from me, the troll lay prone. Spooky (who was still rather new to me, mind you) suggested setting it on fire before it got back up. We toasted it.

Celwyn promised to make it all better with him, but Ronco just harrumped. We continued on toward the place, and met flying trolls. They were jumping out of the second story windows at us. One nearly got me. Instead of ducking or dodging out of the way (as any smart halfling would have) I fire an arrow at it. It hurt me, badly. Spooky helped me back out of the fight, and by the time I was back on my feet, it was another smoldering pile.

We finally went inside on the north end. We found only a few locked doors, and no traps at all. We did find LOTS and LOTS of troll sign. Ronco was ready to go upstairs, so I followed and covered him with my bow. I checked at all shut doors, doing the usually look for danger routine, and found a troll all unawares upstairs. Ahmed looked ahead to place him, and we ambushed it very well. It died first round (happy to say, I was responsible for some heavy damage that time).
As we were tossing flaming remains out the window, double trouble came in. There was an ogre and a troll. Both of them were wearing crowns. One crown solid copper, and the other was silver. The ogre said "I am Lilybo." The troll said "I am Lilybo." Uh-oh. This wasn't good. The troll looked us over and said "I go get troops."

The ogre advanced. I had two choices: stand and get torn apart, or dive out the window. I dove out the window. Now, I was thinking about clambering back up, and then shoot from a safe vantage, when the bard came sailing out after me. Then followed the valiant (ahem) ranger, and then Ronco, and as Ahmed sailed out, there was an earthshattering kaboom behind him. The house went up in flames. Ahmed said "You decapitated him on that last swing."

"So why blow the whole place up?"
"To exterminate the rest of them."

We got commendations. The crown was caught by Ahmed, and he's been studying it relentlessly. Thinks it might be a crown of leadership.
Wonder when my goggles will be ready?

 

[jasper]

spooky speaks

Both Celwyn and Ackmed had been study for the past week; I guess they finally passed their exams. Celwyn has bulked up, lots of nice big muscles. Ackmed has a thoughtful look on his face.

As I was tying Ackmed’s shoelaces together, I heard Celwyn and Tickleberry talking about running Ackmed for town council. I quickly retied his shoes and sneaked into the other room. Hmm politics. Lots of jokes there! Just as I was wrapping my mind around the possibilities, Ronco Betide knows on the door asking for Lilybo!

It appears Lilybo was really a moneychanger! After a quick discussion, Ronco lets drop that Lilybo had a summer mansion to the east. After a quick hiring spree, we load the horse to check it out. After defeating flying belly flopping trolls, we enter the house. We sneak up stairs and off another troll.

Ackmed toss more oil on the troll and shoves it out the window, the door to room flies open. I thought we had secured it. An ogre and a troll enter. The ogre yells that he is Lilybo. The troll yells he is Lilybo. They look at each other and yell, “We are Lilybo!” Oh great the evil spirit of the thief Lilybo is confused and taking over monsters. The Lilybo troll yells for it minions and takes a step back. The ogre charges. I notice that the ogre is wearing a copper crown and the troll is wearing a silver crown. I take high cover and start getting ready to cast. Then a Chinese Laurel and Hardy routine begins with out the bad piano music.

Tickle berry was closest to the door. She takes a swing at ogre and starts back flipping… out the window… on top of the burning troll…

Celwyn, who was next to window, starts humming the “Hey Mr. Custard” and dives out the window… on top of the troll.

The ranger and Ronco were next in line. They had drawn their swords and set for the charge. The ranger goes pale as Tickleberry cartwheels between his legs. He throws a Hail Mary slot shot … turns … and dives out the window… on top of the burning troll…

Ronco grits his teeth and throws an ankle cutter shot. Turns… and is knocked out the window … by the ogre’s baseball swing… on top of the burning troll…

I notice that Ackmed is about release a fireball into the ogre’s nose. And since I only three above this flaming booger, I fly out the window. The same time the wizard cuts loose and drops out the window… on top of the burning troll…

We all missed the burning troll!

The ogre slumps dead or mostly dead out the window! The copper crown flies off its head. Ackmed catches it just as he makes a three-point landing. You know those landings. Feet and Seat!

We retreat to horses hoping the other trolls don’t catch up with us. Half the group is chewed up between the three trolls and confused ogre.

Ackmed insisted of wearing the crown home.

 

[jasper]

Ogre Lilybo speaks

Ogre Lilybo

I was eating halfling and human on a half shield when I had a revelation! I am Lilybo KING OF OGRE THIEVES!

I gather my relatives and we visit the small village of Slapout. The morning after finishing off the blacksmith for dinner, the town watch. Burp! Let me clarify, the town guard from Hartsford arrived for the yearly pick up of weapons. My relatives are ate bunch of halflings, I mean ogres. The guards came prepared and I had leave.

I wandered for a few weeks until I came across myself in charge of some trolls. After eating a wagon train or two, I decided the cave complex sucked. I talked with myself. Lilybo and I decide to go back to my summerhouse. I arrived and we promptly ate Aunt Bee and Opie. Hired help should not ask for pay raises when I having a bad week.

About of week or two later, I was playing cards with myself. Even when cheating, I was losing to myself. Lilybo’s boys were trashing the place and it sounded like some of them jumped out the windows. But I had ordered the house doors to be strong and nearly sound proof. I and myself heard a noise near the end of house. I and myself rose to check it out. I saw myself tuck an ace into my crown. I will have to talk to me about cheating.

We walk down to my spare bedroom. As we enter I notice a group of brigands who has just murdered one of Lilybo’s trolls. I announce myself. The guilty party members look up and go pale. It is nice being only three feet high and put terror in a group of low level adventurers. I charge and I yell for the boys while going for help.

The party panics and all but one jump out the window. As I go to backslap a mage he throws something up my nose.

Ahh… Ahh… Ahh… Ahhcoo BOOM!

 

[jasper]

Lilybo the troll

I was nibbling on a knight’s knee one night when it became clear. I am Lilybo guild head of all the troll rogues. I polish my silver crown to a high shine. And get to work.

You know trolls are hard to train. Gee you think they were honor students from SlapOut middle school. After a couple weeks of training and pounding my head against the wall, I decide to improve the cave complex. I leave a note at my out of town drop for Larry Trap builder. He arrives at the meeting location and faints. He is overwhelmed with my presence.
Larry starts on his work after I nibble off the toes on his left foot. However, he needs help and I have to find it in short order. I do. But the gnomes are not happy when some of my trollish brethren snack on them. After many beatings, on both the trolls and gnomes they work together. Larry does a good job. Just be before Larry visited, my boys found my pet Rover, so I had Larry include him in the trap. I paid Larry off and ripped of his right leg and beat him with it. The boys snacked his left leg.

I teamed up with myself later. You know mom doesn’t know she gave birth to an ogre. That will make the next family reunion very interesting. We decide to blow the cave complex. I swing by Hartsford to have dinner with Larry. After a small snack of gnomes, we arrive at my summer home. I feed the hired help to the boys. That will teach Aunt Bee to make sure to dust the corners of the rooms.

I hang out with myself and I start a major poker game. Even when cheating I having a hard time winning. I hear a noise at the back bedroom and I and myself go to check it out. On the way out, I notice myself tucking an ace into my crown. I will have to talk to me about cheating. If that troll is ripping up my wallpaper, I am going to put my foot so far up… Myself and I announce ourselves. It is a bunch of want a be rogues. With Ronco, a guy I had done business with. I leave to go get the boys for supper. And myself charges.

As I get half way down the hall, a huge fireball cooks off. After I rally the boys, the house is too far-gone in flames. I call for Rover and make a head count. I have three MIA’s and one killed. I hate alchemist fire.

Ok my Ronco von Peel you have invaded my house. Killed my guests. Murder myself. And stole my copper crown. I will be hunting for you now.