What happened to Devis?

[coyote6]

I heard VH1's doing a Behind the Music on poor old Devis.

 

[Hennet]

Devis Shafting

Did Devis get the shaft?

Devis is a half-elf bard. He gets (and gives) the shaft more often than Alhandra smites. He'll shaft anything that walks.


That is what we're talking about, right?

 

[Tabarnak Smokeblower]

Re: Devis Shafting

Devis is a half-elf bard. He gets (and gives) the shaft more often than Alhandra smites. He'll shaft anything that walks.


That is what we're talking about, right?

Hennet, you a baaaad moth...

 

[Naull]

Devis is a half-elf bard. He gets (and gives) the shaft more often than Alhandra smites. He'll shaft anything that walks.

I think you are on the wrong boards Hennet.

 

[Davelozzi]

...speaking of second rank iconics.

or are you third rank, Naull?

 

[Devis]

No, no. she's FIRST rank - right in front of me, if you know what I mean. I'm guarding her rear, when I'm not watching over Mialee. *wink*

And sa ha! Hail and well met, good gentles! The rumors of my retirement are greatly exaggerated. That little bastard Gimple, or whatever his name is, may have infested my dressing room while I was out hoisting a few with the boys... but I've hired Regdar's Extermination Service. He'll be out before you know it.

And let's face it, folks. Not only do I shower, I shower over with veritable bucketloads of charisma, song, and verse. I also come up higher than your bloody waist, unlike some pretenders you may care to mention. *sniff.

In any case, it's good to see you all. Hennet, your buckles are sexier than ever. How's that hot little paladin?

 

[Naull]

Hey, hey now! Let's not get into the rank and status issue. I had a starring role in a book or two. I just don't have the flash that Mialee does, being a Diviner. She gets more offers than I do.

Devis, I didn't know you cared. It's nice to know someone has my back!

 

[Alhandra]

Re: Devis Shafting

Devis is a half-elf bard. He gets (and gives) the shaft more often than Alhandra smites. He'll shaft anything that walks.

Heironeous help me, are you right there, Hennet!

I can dish out some righteous Smiting (especially with my 3.5 power-up - woot!), but my evil beat-down powerzz are nothing compared to Devis' Atomic Love Shaft (tm) abilities.

The man's a MACHINE.

 

[Anabstercorian]

Ah, it's good to see the iconics again. My tentacles quiver with delight to see your healthy brains, so churning with wit.

Seriously, though, Devis, have you retained contract with WotC, or have they ousted you? It would be a Ilsensine-cursed error for them to throw you away, especially when you count the value of having two distinct bards who can showcase the flexibility of the 3.5 system by being distinctively different.

 

[Devis]

So many cardboard iconics and the one made from denim gets cut...

Denim? Baby, I barely know him! *throws head back and laughs*

Everyone knows that my true heart has been captured by alhandra, O so long ago, ever since I first saw the sketches of her without her plate mail on.

I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair.
Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets.
Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day
I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps.

Speaking of "bread does not nourish me," it has been a difficult few months. I had been all lined up to be the model for the upcoming Book of Erotic Fantasy, but an ex-girlfriend - or four - scuttled that plan. One ill-placed comment about my "little tiny shortsword," and I'm out on the street.

And you know who they're using instead? Do you? Jozan! Apparently, that oversized codpiece of his must have stirred their gullible little hearts. Honestly, considering that when you knock on it it echoes, I was a little surprised with their ultimate choice. He's such a ponce.

But life goes on, and we all find ways to support ourselves, eh?