What happened to Growing Up?

[sabrinathecat]

I've run into this a time or two before, but noticed it again last night when watching October Sky (which was a great movie by the way).
Used to be that by the time people graduated High School, they were adults. They were ready to go out and earn a living.
Now, people seem to wait until 25 or 30 or even 35 before growing up.
How did this happen?
When, exactly, did this happen?
How do we fix it?
It is one thing to be in touch with your inner child, but another to still be one.
And it isn't just the expectations have changed because most jobs require college. It seems as though we don't instill the pride and sense of becoming independent.
One friend of mine has a theory that it is part of the plan to dumb down the masses because uninformed people are easier to control, and goes on a bit.
I'm not necessarily talking about education, but overall maturity.

 

[Joker]

Is this based on anything other than your limited personal experience? Sociological studies and such?

Otherwise I'll just say that the advent of the internet has made immature actions from some people more visible and that might be coloring your perceptions.

 

[Kramodlog]

I think you are conflating being an adult and earning a living.

Not sure why it needs to be "fixed". Seems like idealizing the a past that had its own problems. Jews use to consider adulthood at 13.Times change.

Jobs are harder to find, houses cost a lot, you leave school with tones of debt, the new generation will have the burden of paying for the Baby Boomers for quite while... So people postpone the time they leave the house, it is logical. In that way the new world is cathing up to Europe.

In Italy kids stay with their parents for a very long time and inherite the family house. In China you live with your parents and you're supposed take care of them until they die.

Why do you think casting people out of the house is a good thing in the first place? Wouldn't it be more beneficial if parents and kids pooled their resources?

 

[Homicidal_Squirrel]

I've run into this a time or two before, but noticed it again last night when watching October Sky (which was a great movie by the way).
Used to be that by the time people graduated High School, they were adults. They were ready to go out and earn a living.
Now, people seem to wait until 25 or 30 or even 35 before growing up.
How did this happen?
When, exactly, did this happen?
How do we fix it?
It is one thing to be in touch with your inner child, but another to still be one.
And it isn't just the expectations have changed because most jobs require college. It seems as though we don't instill the pride and sense of becoming independent.
One friend of mine has a theory that it is part of the plan to dumb down the masses because uninformed people are easier to control, and goes on a bit.
I'm not necessarily talking about education, but overall maturity.

How exactly do you believe an adult is supposed to behave?

 

[Umbran]

And it isn't just the expectations have changed because most jobs require college.

Actually, I think you underestimate that effect. It is difficult to go out and earn a living when there are no living-wage jobs that will hire you.

Requiring college doesn't help. But it is worse than that. Remember that we had a major recession back after in 2001, and another in 2007. It has been a long while since it was easy for a new person in the workforce to get a decent job.

It seems as though we don't instill the pride and sense of becoming independent.

A sense won't cut hte mustard if there's no paycheck.

One friend of mine has a theory that it is part of the plan to dumb down the masses because uninformed people are easier to control, and goes on a bit.

"The plan"? Really? "The plan"?

The irony of complaining about kids today not stepping up and acting like mature, intelligent adults, and explaining it with a conspiracy theory, is pretty rich.

 

[Morrus]

It's a good thing. It means you have a rich and prosperous society.

If you want to "fix" it (it doesn't need fixing, but assuming you do), then find a way to plunge your country into poverty. You can go back to ploughing the fields from the age of 8 from dawn until sundown until you die. It'll be awesome!

Otherwise - increasing ability to spend more and more amounts of time on luxury pursuits is evidence that one's society is most definitely progressing beyond the Stone Age.

People don't go our and break their backs as soon as possible any more because they don't have to. Nobody did it out of fun, y'know.

 

[Kramodlog]

People don't go our and break their backs as soon as possible any more because they don't have to. Nobody did it out of fun, y'know.

My grandfather would disagree. He use to walk barefoot in broken glass so he could play soccer with his friends when he was a kid. They used a brick for a ball. Those were better days, he keeps saying.

 

[PigKnight]

I think you are conflating being an adult and earning a living.

Not sure why it needs to be "fixed". Seems like idealizing the a past that had its own problems. Jews use to consider adulthood at 13.Times change.

Jobs are harder to find, houses cost a lot, you leave school with tones of debt, the new generation will have the burden of paying for the Baby Boomers for quite while... So people postpone the time they leave the house, it is logical. In that way the new world is cathing up to Europe.

In Italy kids stay with their parents for a very long time and inherite the family house. In China you live with your parents and you're supposed take care of them until they die.

Why do you think casting people out of the house is a good thing in the first place? Wouldn't it be more beneficial if parents and kids pooled their resources?

I can't believe it, I agree with Goldo.

 

[sabrinathecat]

OK, folks: Apples, Oranges.

I am not talking about how crappy our economy is.
I am not talking about the lack of jobs.
These are both very serious problems.

(and I'm not saying I subscribe to my friend's conspiracy theory either)

I am talking about basic maturity and attitude.
I do not get the sense that the kids getting out of high school are ready to be adults.
Hell, I didn't get that sense back when I was graduating from high school.

This is not about enjoying leisure time.
I am talking about being mentally ready to take on and be a part of society.
It seems to me that the early 20s are more of a prolonged childhood and adolescence.

That, to me, is a problem.

How do I think adults should behave?
Willing to take responsibility for their actions and in-actions (wouldn't that be something). No just "oh, my bad," but "This is my fault, and I will do whatever it takes to fix it."
Having pride of self worth not because some self-esteem instructor told them to, but by earning it through some form of accomplishment.
Ready to go into either a college or the workforce and earn a living. (Crappy economy notwithstanding, not talking about the lack of jobs, but how many are even ready to take on a job? How many teenagers do you know that you would be willing to turn over your business and costumers to for an hour, unsupervised?)

 

[PigKnight]

Where are you getting these ideas from? The internet? Social interaction? The media? Personal theories? You seem to be grouping every 20ish year old together into one generalized group and labeling them all as uniformly immature. Maybe, they aren't all mature but maybe you only notice the immature ones because they are more vocal than the mature ones. Furthermore, maybe nothing has changed over the years and those that are immature can just more easily show how they are immature compared to immature 20ish year olds of past generations (likely due to social media and the internet letting everyone know what everyone is doing).