So my question is: Why is the hassle needed to return from the dead? By dying you potentially lose a lot of game time spent building up that character also adventure hooks etc. It would be much more fun not penalizing character death to this extent.
The rules of the game model the reality of the game world, which is what lends
meaning to the actions of your character. Your decisions as a player, figuring out what your character should do, only
matter because of their consequences.
As an example, let's say a dragon has burst into the fancy dinner party you've attended, and it starts wrecking the place. You have a number of obvious options available to you (and any number of less obvious options, which we'll ignore for the sake of simplicity): 1) You could run to get your weapon or magic focus, and then run back to engage the dragon and hopefully save the day before it's caused too much damage; 2) You could charge straight at the dragon, armed with only your dinner knife; 3) You could create a distraction, hoping to lure the dragon away while everyone else escapes.
Without getting into too many specifics, because there's likely to be a lot of dice rolling in any occasion, one of those choices is much more likely to get yourself killed. This could literally be the end of your life. You could literally be dead within the next minute. Or a lot of other people could be dead soon, depending on your choice. If you (the player) don't take these things into consideration, then you (the character) can't make the
right decision - whatever that may mean to them. But the point is, whether you charge forward and die, or run away and let other people die, your choice actually
matters.
If the character can't die without the consent of the player, then your decision wouldn't
matter at all. If you survive through narrative fiat, rather than through the internal causality within the game world, then you shouldn't really have survived at all - if the world was a real-but-fantastic place, rather than just a story, you
would be dead. And why would anyone
care about a game where your choices
don't matter?