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Would you allow this paladin in your game? (new fiction added 11/11/08)

Would you allow this paladin character in your game?


JamesonCourage

Adventurer
Okay, I would've commented sooner, but I just finished reading all 82 pages (83, counting this one).

My answer: he's not a Paladin. I'm not even convinced he's Lawful (he seems more Neutral to me), and he basically lost "act with honor" as of kicking someone in the groin in a fight. Some other acts are pretty much borderline (trapping the temple, setting the ogre up for what is basically assassination), but I'd think about it a lot before stripping someone's powers away (if I was still playing 3.5). He's also not really meeting "respect legitimate authority" enough in my book (how he treats the other Paladin), even if the author did write him as basically infallible within the church's religion. That has no bearing on treating others with respect, in my book.

To sum up: I think he's Neutral, not Lawful; the groin kick certainly isn't honorable; I don't think he shows enough respect to legitimate authority; and he's borderline on other honor issues.

He's a fine character concept to play (though I was greatly turned off by the Mary Sue status he was given in the writing, but probably only because I'm not rooting for him as a working concept). I'd allow him as a Neutral Good Cleric (again, if I still played 3.5). But a Paladin? No. So not only would he not be allowed in my game, he also wouldn't be a Paladin.

Just my thoughts. Feel free to disagree, obviously. It's a fun thread, though. As always, play what you like :)
 

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Aurondarklord

First Post
ummm...excuse me, but....why is kicking someone in the groin dishonorable?

If you're fighting a red dragon, is it dishonorable to cast a cold spell on it?

If Batman is fighting Superman, is it dishonorable for him to use kryptonite?

What about stories about dragons, like Fafnir or the dragon from Beowulf, where the hero, often a paladin-like archetype, slays the dragon by attacking a weak spot in its neck or chest, which mythological dragons are sometimes attributed to have? Was this dishonorable?

What about any video game where a boss fight involves waiting for an opening in its pattern where you can shoot a little blinking red spot which is the only place you can cause damage, is this dishonorable?

I bet most people would answer no to most or all of the above, even find the notion that those things would be considered dishonorable ridiculous. Yet what's the difference between any of these and kicking someone in the groin? The groin is one of the anatomical weak points of most male humanoids. But that's all it is, a weak point that can be exploited to cause additional damage or debilitation with an attack. There are numerous others on the human body, yet people give special attention to the groin when they talk about "honor", declaring it as some arbitrary line that must not be crossed or you're "fighting dirty". But it's exactly that, arbitrary. As men, we fear getting hit there so we try to declare it "off limits", it's not any different than medieval knights trying to get the church to declare the use of crossbows a sin because a crossbow could pierce armor and therefore they feared that lowly peasant footmen could kill them. Can anyone think of a game they've been in where paladins were forbidden from using crossbows?

Do you define "honor" as "a paladin must not take advantage of an enemy's weak points"? If you don't, why is the groin more "dishonorable" than other weak points? If you do, what constitutes a weak point? elemental weaknesses? any spot on the body that causes additional pain or injury? cuz that would be most vital organs, especially instant kill shots like the throat, heart, and brain. By that logic, a paladin must not use holy items against fiends and undead, since it's their weakness and deals extra damage. I'm sure you can see how silly this idea can get if you actually think about it.

I abhor the idea that "act with honor" is taken to mean "paladins must fight with one hand tied behind their back", that they must be lawful stupid, that the expected way for them to fight is to ride up to the enemy forces, plant a big banner in the ground, and stand there yelling challenges at them, expecting that the enemy leader will decide to step forward for a duel Silmarillion style. Paladins should not be required to refrain from using intelligent tactics, after all, as Sun Tzu said, all war is based on deception, and at least to some degree, that's ALWAYS true, whether you're trying to maneuver an enemy force into a spot where they can be flanked, or you're Obi-Wan Kenobi using mind tricks and manipulation to infiltrate the death star (and you cannot tell me the Jedi are not a lawful good paladin-like order). Paladins should not be required to make suicidal last stands for no reason when tactical retreat is a valid option. It's one thing to say a paladin should retreat last to cover his comrades or escaping civilians because he's willing to die for others, it's another to say he shouldn't retreat AT ALL because he's willing to die FOR NOTHING.

No class should be interpreted as encouraging, let alone REQUIRING, stupid behavior on the part of players. Paladins are not lemmings.

In my mind, fighting dishonorably means doing something like impersonating the red cross, pretending to surrender, or sending a false distress call, acts that break the generally accepted rules of warfare. Refusing quarter to a defeated enemy who begs for mercy is also dishonorable, at least the first time he does it, I don't believe paladins are required to repeatedly spare someone who then promptly attacks them when their back is turned or otherwise goes right back to their evil ways, nor should this apply to "always evil" beings that are physically incapable of reform. Of course, if a paladin agrees to a battle by certain rules, such as a duel, they must then abide by those rules...at least as long as their opponent does so.
 
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Salthorae

Imperial Mountain Dew Taster
Love that this thread and story have continued and generated mostly healthy discussion for very close to 8 YEARS now...

If Shilsen ever decides to write more of Cedric's story I certainly wouldn't mind! :)
 


JamesonCourage

Adventurer
ummm...excuse me, but....why is kicking someone in the groin dishonorable?
Honor is, admittedly, a pretty regional thing, but most people have a concept of "dirty fighting". This is generally seen as acceptable by those who think along the lines of "all is fair in love and war." Which is fine, and makes for fun characters.

I think this goes against the Paladin's code of honor, though. Honor in combat is about an honest duel, a show of skill and strength on each side. It's not about skipping the combat early by means of a shortcut (like poison, which a Paladin cannot use). Again, this is an "I think" and it's my take, but when I think of honorable combat, I don't think of "dirty fighting". When I think of honorable combat, it's kind of like sportsmanship. I don't think of sticky residue on gloves as honorable in football, even if it's not explicitly banned (which of course they have been for a while, it's just an example). It's one more way to win, sure, but you're bypassing the point of the competition (from a sportsmanship point of view).
If you're fighting a red dragon, is it dishonorable to cast a cold spell on it?

If Batman is fighting Superman, is it dishonorable for him to use kryptonite?
Depends on the dragon. If it'll simply end the fight, then probably. I wouldn't consider it honorable to, say, kick the crutches out from a guy if he had a broken leg, or hit a guy in the glasses. As for the Batman / Superman thing, yes, I'd say it's not honorable (which is fine; Batman is still my favorite superhero).
What about stories about dragons, like Fafnir or the dragon from Beowulf, where the hero, often a paladin-like archetype, slays the dragon by attacking a weak spot in its neck or chest, which mythological dragons are sometimes attributed to have? Was this dishonorable?
I'd like a concrete example before I comment on it, but possibly.
What about any video game where a boss fight involves waiting for an opening in its pattern where you can shoot a little blinking red spot which is the only place you can cause damage, is this dishonorable?
Probably not? I'm not sure, though. I don't think honor comes up much in video game fights like that.
But it's exactly that, arbitrary.
I don't think that it is completely. Arbitrary means "based on random choice or personal whim, rather than any reason or system", and I think there's reason for "honor" as it applies to combat. Again, it's about not skipping the combat, or "cheating" somehow. Indiana Jones taking a guy with swords out by just shooting him isn't honorable (even if it's awesome). Again, just my take on it.
Can anyone think of a game they've been in where paladins were forbidden from using crossbows?
Duels where both people have guns (or in this case, crossbows) are one thing; killing people at range when they don't have the ability to stop you is another. I could easily see a game where a Paladin wasn't allowed to shoot infantry with bows, but archers were fair game.
Do you define "honor" as "a paladin must not take advantage of an enemy's weak points"?
No.
If you don't, why is the groin more "dishonorable" than other weak points?
It's a cheap shot. They aren't honorable because they don't test skill and strength. The point of honor is to keep the competition pure, and this is essentially bypassing that. (As an aside, I had a campaign world where the god of honor was basically "any rules that people agree to, including no rules.")
I abhor the idea that "act with honor" is taken to mean "paladins must fight with one hand tied behind their back", that they must be lawful stupid, that the expected way for them to fight is to ride up to the enemy forces, plant a big banner in the ground, and stand there yelling challenges at them, expecting that the enemy leader will decide to step forward for a duel Silmarillion style.
Okay.
Paladins should not be required to refrain from using intelligent tactics, after all, as Sun Tzu said, all war is based on deception, and at least to some degree, that's ALWAYS true,
I've had Paladins that definitely use intelligent tactics, and I agree about the deception part (though it's the extent that a Paladin will take it to that's in question).
or you're Obi-Wan Kenobi using mind tricks and manipulation to infiltrate the death star (and you cannot tell me the Jedi are not a lawful good paladin-like order).
I certainly do not think that he (or most jedi from the movies / books) are Lawful Good Paladin types. Especially Qui-Gon.
Paladins should not be required to make suicidal last stands for no reason when tactical retreat is a valid option.
Totally agreed.
It's one thing to say a paladin should retreat last to cover his comrades or escaping civilians because he's willing to die for others, it's another to say he shouldn't retreat AT ALL because he's willing to die FOR NOTHING.
And I never said that, and I'm in agreement with you.
No class should be interpreted as encouraging, let alone REQUIRING, stupid behavior on the part of players. Paladins are not lemmings.
I think somewhere along the line you started making a lot of assumptions of views I never expressed my mind on. Sorry about that?
In my mind, fighting dishonorably means doing something like impersonating the red cross, pretending to surrender, or sending a false distress call, acts that break the generally accepted rules of warfare. Refusing quarter to a defeated enemy who begs for mercy is also dishonorable, at least the first time he does it, I don't believe paladins are required to repeatedly spare someone who then promptly attacks them when their back is turned or otherwise goes right back to their evil ways, nor should this apply to "always evil" beings that are physically incapable of reform. Of course, if a paladin agrees to a battle by certain rules, such as a duel, they must then abide by those rules...at least as long as their opponent does so.
I agree with most of this, I just take it a little further. To me, "justified dirty fighting" and the like doesn't equal "honor." But hey, I'm not going into your game to change it (not that it applies to 4e D&D, and the large amount of people that play it). Heck, I'm not even running 3.5, so I'm not even restricting my players in such a way (our game doesn't even have alignment). So hey, enjoy your game any way you like! As always, play what you like :)
 


Aurondarklord

First Post
Honor is, admittedly, a pretty regional thing, but most people have a concept of "dirty fighting". This is generally seen as acceptable by those who think along the lines of "all is fair in love and war." Which is fine, and makes for fun characters.

I think this goes against the Paladin's code of honor, though. Honor in combat is about an honest duel, a show of skill and strength on each side. It's not about skipping the combat early by means of a shortcut (like poison, which a Paladin cannot use). Again, this is an "I think" and it's my take, but when I think of honorable combat, I don't think of "dirty fighting". When I think of honorable combat, it's kind of like sportsmanship. I don't think of sticky residue on gloves as honorable in football, even if it's not explicitly banned (which of course they have been for a while, it's just an example). It's one more way to win, sure, but you're bypassing the point of the competition (from a sportsmanship point of view).

Depends on the dragon. If it'll simply end the fight, then probably. I wouldn't consider it honorable to, say, kick the crutches out from a guy if he had a broken leg, or hit a guy in the glasses. As for the Batman / Superman thing, yes, I'd say it's not honorable (which is fine; Batman is still my favorite superhero).

I'd like a concrete example before I comment on it, but possibly.

Probably not? I'm not sure, though. I don't think honor comes up much in video game fights like that.

I don't think that it is completely. Arbitrary means "based on random choice or personal whim, rather than any reason or system", and I think there's reason for "honor" as it applies to combat. Again, it's about not skipping the combat, or "cheating" somehow. Indiana Jones taking a guy with swords out by just shooting him isn't honorable (even if it's awesome). Again, just my take on it.

Duels where both people have guns (or in this case, crossbows) are one thing; killing people at range when they don't have the ability to stop you is another. I could easily see a game where a Paladin wasn't allowed to shoot infantry with bows, but archers were fair game.

No.

It's a cheap shot. They aren't honorable because they don't test skill and strength. The point of honor is to keep the competition pure, and this is essentially bypassing that. (As an aside, I had a campaign world where the god of honor was basically "any rules that people agree to, including no rules.")

Okay.

I've had Paladins that definitely use intelligent tactics, and I agree about the deception part (though it's the extent that a Paladin will take it to that's in question).

I certainly do not think that he (or most jedi from the movies / books) are Lawful Good Paladin types. Especially Qui-Gon.

Totally agreed.

And I never said that, and I'm in agreement with you.

I think somewhere along the line you started making a lot of assumptions of views I never expressed my mind on. Sorry about that?

I agree with most of this, I just take it a little further. To me, "justified dirty fighting" and the like doesn't equal "honor." But hey, I'm not going into your game to change it (not that it applies to 4e D&D, and the large amount of people that play it). Heck, I'm not even running 3.5, so I'm not even restricting my players in such a way (our game doesn't even have alignment). So hey, enjoy your game any way you like! As always, play what you like :)

1e AD&D with Unearthed Arcana Cavaliers and Paladin-Cavaliers - no missile weapons at all, and bound by a strict code of honour that seems to exactly match your definition of 'lawful stupid'.

S'mon, wow, okay, that is waaaay before my time, but I'll take your word for it. However, I'm curious, was the lack of missile weapons part of a paladin's code of honor, or was it simply a game mechanic that paladins couldn't equip these weapon types, like how in, for example, world of warcraft, a mage can't equip an axe and a warrior can't equip a wand? However, while you did beat me at my own rhetorical question, we are primarily talking about 3E here, where paladins are allowed ranged weapons, and I believe there are even feats specifically designed to support that. Zen Archery, I believe the feat is called, lets you add your wisdom modifier to ranged attacks.

JamesonCourage, I'm not so much attributing views to you that you never expressed as the scope of my post became more than a direct response to you and sort of turned into a list of misconceptions about paladin honor I hate. Not your fault. Now, a couple of those things I'll give you, there is always a question of degree, in "all war is deception" or anything else, any behavior, even reasonable behavior, can be taken to an unhealthy extreme. I listed several examples, like impersonating the red cross, of deceptions in war that are considered dishonorable by modern society. I'll also definitely give you Qui-Gon, but you have to remember that even in-universe, Qui-Gon is considered a maverick who flouts the Jedi Order's rules and routinely disobeys the council. Jedi (old republic era rules) in general I still consider an exceptional example of LG, an order of noble protectors who live in monastic servitude to their ideals and the people of their setting, following a strict code of behavioral rules. What could possibly sound more like a paladin? They're even referred to as knights!

With regards to you asking for a specific example of a dragon with such a weak spot, Smaug from the hobbit, so much treasure had melted into his body that it formed impenetrable armor all around him, except for one small spot over his heart. Bard ultimately kills him by using his black arrow to target this specific spot.

As for the rest...I definitely like this God of Honor you mentioned, any rules you agreed to, including no rules. Of course, a paladin must be good in ADDITION to honorable, so he can never fight by "no rules", there will always be certain things a paladin can't do, but if there are no standing agreements in place, and the setting has no generally accepted laws and customs of war, I definitely think a paladin can fight by no rules except not using tactics that are inherently evil, for example torture (I don't want to get into a huge real world philosophy discussion of whether torture is ever justified, I simply list it because the RAW specifically classes torture as an evil act).

The thing about sportsmanship is that sports have rules, clearly defined guidelines for how the game is played, that generally have both a letter and an easily interpreted spirit. Sports are competition for the sake of competition, and trying to work your way around the skill set that the sport requires is very much a violation of the spirit of the game.

War doesn't work like that.

While perhaps not ALL is fair in war (or love for that matter) it's a very broad pursuit involving coordination between different people with a wide range of skill sets and numerous different advantages and disadvantages against each other being balanced out. It is not, generally speaking, just a duel or a collection of duels between paired off knights. If such rules have been agreed upon, then of course the paladin should obey them, but in most cases they have not.

A paladin does not go to war to test his strength and swordsmanship, if he wishes to do that, he may enter a tournament. A paladin goes to war to defend the innocent and vanquish evil, and if he allows the innocent to die when he could have done something to stop it, because he'd rather lose fighting "properly" than win fighting intelligently, has he not been derelict in another part of his oath? the part about defending the innocent and punishing evil? This seems to me a question of law vs good, and the generally accepted wisdom for such situations is that a paladin should choose good when he encounters them.

A lot of your examples just seem to me to boil down to "a paladin must intentionally handicap himself", which would really be pretty suicidal. You can't use ranged attacks on melee enemies even in a pitched battle where the other side's ranged fighters are taking full advantage of it? You'll lose, needlessly. That's like saying that if a paladin is fighting a rogue, he must first take off his heavy armor, because that gives him an unfair advantage...of course the rogue will keep all the advantages HE has, but the paladin must have none. And that IS arbitrary, it IS a rule that makes no logical sense and exists on an abstract whim. What if your paladin is only equipped with a ranged weapon and the other guy has a sword? should he fight bare handed because his code dictates he must not have an advantage, which means in this circumstance he must artificially give himself a DISadvantage? What if an enemy challenges a paladin to a duel with weapons that the enemy is an expert with but the paladin has never used before? is the paladin obligated to accept this challenge? if you say he should not "bypass combat" then yes he is. This seems ridiculous to me, and extremely exploitable, enemies could simply force a paladin to always fight them only at the thing they're best at, a situation where in every individual aspect of combat, the paladin must always artificially handicap himself in the areas where he's better to be "equal" while retaining the full penalty of all his disadvantages, which will make the paladin in total weaker than his foe every time. That's obviously unreasonable. But if you take a broader, more open view of "total combat skill" that allows a paladin to have and use combat advantages over his enemies, then if the ogre were legitimately "more skilled" than Cedric, he could have blocked the shot to his groin or otherwise prevented himself from losing the fight on account of it. As an example, Aragorn is very paladin-like, a paragon of just and noble kingship. Was it dishonorable of him to save Minas Tirith by calling the Oathbreakers into battle? Obviously they gave him an enormous advantage, they were ghosts, thus intangible and unable to be harmed by the living and, depending on whether you're looking at the books or the movies, either scared Sauron's armies into disarray and often literally to death, or slaughtered them wholesale while taking full advantage of their incorporeality.

You say that you don't consider it inherently dishonorable to attack an enemy's weak spot, but the groin is a "cheap shot". what makes it a cheaper shot than a shot at any other weak point? It's not somehow easier or less skilled, a skilled enemy is perfectly capable of protecting it, by wearing armor there, by using his shield, or any number of other means. So what's the problem?

I'd also point out that nothing anywhere in the rules has said a paladin may not "skip combat", in fact in many cases, I would see a paladin as morally obligated to try to avoid unnecessary bloodshed, to try to negotiate settlements between enemies where neither side is truly evil, to offer redemption to the wicked as an alternative to violence, a paladin is a high charisma class for a reason. even attempting stealth to enter an enemy stronghold instead of charging in the front door is often a very paladin-like thing to do because it allows the paladin to avoid needlessly taking the lives of guards who are only trying to do their jobs and likely are unaware of and uninvolved in any evil being plotted by their employer. In fact, the book of exalted deeds offers "ravages and afflictions" which are basically good aligned poisons paladins are allowed to use, so that they would have a full range of combat options available to them without the unnecessarily cruel implications of poison.

On a totally unrelated note, which is not a response to anyone, on further consideration I feel I need to amend my position on Cedric's use of prostitutes to say that whether this is allowed also depends heavily on the state of contraception in the setting. A paladin should never go from place to place leaving a string of illegitimate children in his wake. This is harmful to both the women he fathers children with, who are forced to raise them on their own without his financial or emotional support, and to the children who grow up without a father and in many settings, suffering the social stigma of bastardy. If we're looking at a realistic medieval setting, where contraception often revolved around trying to predict a woman's fertility cycle and avoid sex during that time, and herbs that were at best not fully reliable and at worst superstitious nonsense or potentially harmful to a woman who took them, then a paladin who sleeps around will almost inevitably eventually impregnate some of the women he's sleeping with, and must limit his sexual practices with according caution. These risks, and of course the high death rate for women in childbirth in ancient times, were a large part of the reason older societies and religions often demonized sexuality. Of course, if in this setting, reasonably reliable and safe methods of birth control exist, such as contraceptive spells or alchemical potions, or even just fictional herbs that work better than their real world counterparts, then this is not an issue and Cedric's obligation in that regard would be merely to practice safe sex and in whatever way he's able, "step up" in the unlikely event he accidentally fathers a child.
 
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Mallus

Legend
S'mon, wow, okay, that is waaaay before my time, but I'll take your word for it. However, I'm curious, was the lack of missile weapons part of a paladin's code of honor, or was it simply a game mechanic that paladins couldn't equip these weapon types, like how in, for example, world of warcraft, a mage can't equip an axe and a warrior can't equip a wand?
Some history...

The AD&D (1e) supplement Unearthed Arcana placed some... questionable role-playing restrictions on several classes, ie restrictions, if taken literally, meant they were for all intents and purposes, unplayable. For example, Barbarians couldn't join a standard D&D party until 6th level (ie, a party with both a magic-user and cleric) and couldn't use magical healing at all at 1st level (which raises the question of how they got to 2nd level at all, a fact compounded by the amount of XP they needed to get off 1st level).

Paladins, now as a subclass of the UA class "cavalier", were subject to some, in retrospect, utterly ridiculous rules. Here's a direct quote:

"As a result of the code and desire for battle, cavaliers cannot be controlled in battle situations. They will charge any enemy in sight, with the following order of preference:

1. Powerful monsters (dragons, demons, giants, etc.) serving
2. Opponent cavaliers of great renown, enemy flags
3. Opponent cavalry of noble or elite status
4. Other opponent cavalry
5. Opponent elite footmen
6. Opponent camp and headquarters
7. Opponent melee troops
8. Levies or peasants
enemy leaders, then the leaders themselves.
and standards.
The cavalier’s charge will be made at full speed, regardless of army cohesion, intervening friendly troops, or other such considerations."
-- Unearthed Arcana, page 16.

You can see here the origin of "Lawful Stupid". The class is unplayable --actually, it's not "played" at all during combat, since the PC has to follow the attack script quoted above, as if a particularly dumb bot in a video game.

It should be noted the paladin as described in the AD&D Player's Handbook, is not required to be stupid, or practice a form of honor indistinguishable from suicidal stupidity. All that is required of them is them is 1) tithe, 2) not stockpile magic items, and 3) only consort/employ with good characters.

Unfortunately, the autistic Bizarro World conception of quasi-Medieval honor suggested by the text in Unearthed Arcana has left an --unfortunately indelible-- mark on some gamer's conceptions of the paladin's code.

Here endeth the history lesson.

edit: I don't want to leave the impression AD&D, even including UA, is unplayable. In fact, I'm running it tonight! It's just that you need to take certain parts of it, as with any rule system, with a grain of salt... (a glass of wine or three wouldn't hurt, either).
 
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Aurondarklord

First Post
wow, Mallus, I consider myself informed. Clearly, later iterations of the rules realized what a BAD IDEA a system like that was, since nothing like that made it into modern versions of the game.

As a matter of fact, if a player in my game had a paladin behave like that, they would probably lose their powers very quickly, because uncontrollable bloodlust would cost you your lawful alignment, and refusing to show mercy and incurring avoidable friendly fire would be considered evil acts.
 

JamesonCourage

Adventurer
JamesonCourage, I'm not so much attributing views to you that you never expressed as the scope of my post became more than a direct response to you and sort of turned into a list of misconceptions about paladin honor I hate. Not your fault.
That's fair, and informative. We're all just voicing our opinions anyways.
I'll also definitely give you Qui-Gon, but you have to remember that even in-universe, Qui-Gon is considered a maverick who flouts the Jedi Order's rules and routinely disobeys the council. Jedi (old republic era rules) in general I still consider an exceptional example of LG, an order of noble protectors who live in monastic servitude to their ideals and the people of their setting, following a strict code of behavioral rules. What could possibly sound more like a paladin? They're even referred to as knights!
This is an interesting question, and considering this thread's history, I don't feel bad at all going off on this tangent.

Basically, the Jedi Order itself might strive to be Lawful Good, but I do not see the Knights themselves as generally Lawful Good. The Jedi Order has laws, and is rigid; the Knights (and Masters, etc.) routinely stretch or break those laws (they're only guidelines! really!). Most post-Empire Jedi are much more individualistic than not, so even if they observe a lot of laws, I'd probably place most of them at Neutral on the Law-Chaos axis (I'm thinking of people like Corran Horn, Kyp Durron, etc.).

(I'm not as well acquainted with the Old Jedi Order, so there are probably examples of Lawful Good there.)
With regards to you asking for a specific example of a dragon with such a weak spot, Smaug from the hobbit, so much treasure had melted into his body that it formed impenetrable armor all around him, except for one small spot over his heart. Bard ultimately kills him by using his black arrow to target this specific spot.
Based on just the Hobbit, I have no idea if Bard is Lawful or not. As far as "is the shot dishonorable", I'd say it was, yes. Again, it's subjective, but it'd be like kicking the crutches out from someone that needed them to stand... but if that killed them instead. And it's not the killing that's dishonorable, it's the bypassing the fight that is. Do many Paladins struggle with this in my game (when I ran a 3.5 game)? Sure they did. I mean, it defeats Evil that much more safely and efficiently. But that's part of walking the Paladin line.
As for the rest...I definitely like this God of Honor you mentioned, any rules you agreed to, including no rules. Of course, a paladin must be good in ADDITION to honorable, so he can never fight by "no rules", there will always be certain things a paladin can't do, but if there are no standing agreements in place, and the setting has no generally accepted laws and customs of war, I definitely think a paladin can fight by no rules except not using tactics that are inherently evil, for example torture (I don't want to get into a huge real world philosophy discussion of whether torture is ever justified, I simply list it because the RAW specifically classes torture as an evil act).
Yeah, it gets a little awkward when setting starts deciding stuff, but it's necessary (since setting generally decides "honor" and all that). I mean, using poison is listed under "honor", and so it seems assumed that this is always a matter of honor in a default 3.5 world. So is "cheating", which, again, I likened to sportsmanship and bypassing a fight.
The thing about sportsmanship is that sports have rules, clearly defined guidelines for how the game is played, that generally have both a letter and an easily interpreted spirit. Sports are competition for the sake of competition, and trying to work your way around the skill set that the sport requires is very much a violation of the spirit of the game.

War doesn't work like that.
Well, actually, that's not always the case. It's kind of like sports. Some people "play to win, no matter how they win" and others "play to win" with sportsmanship in mind. The same goes for war. This could simply be the difference between "honor" and "dishonor" in combat. That is, those who have rules call it "honor" (no poison, etc.), and must follow these rules, and those who break them are labeled "dishonorable".
It is not, generally speaking, just a duel or a collection of duels between paired off knights. If such rules have been agreed upon, then of course the paladin should obey them, but in most cases they have not.
I think of the Paladin's code as a self-imposed limitation, not one based on agreement between parties. So, on this point I'll disagree.
A paladin does not go to war to test his strength and swordsmanship, if he wishes to do that, he may enter a tournament. A paladin goes to war to defend the innocent and vanquish evil, and if he allows the innocent to die when he could have done something to stop it, because he'd rather lose fighting "properly" than win fighting intelligently, has he not been derelict in another part of his oath? the part about defending the innocent and punishing evil? This seems to me a question of law vs good, and the generally accepted wisdom for such situations is that a paladin should choose good when he encounters them.
But the Paladin must uphold his code at all times. In such a situation, I see a Paladin either doing his best to stop the Evil (and failing), or accepting a fall from grace to stop the Evil (by a dishonorable act for the Greater Good). He can, of course, get Atoned, stay a feat-less Fighter, or turn Blackguard. It's a hard situation for them, and I'd imagine that Paladins have philosophical debates on which is better (to fall and Atone to save innocents, or to go into a situation and knowingly fail to attempt to uphold all of the code).
A lot of your examples just seem to me to boil down to "a paladin must intentionally handicap himself", which would really be pretty suicidal. You can't use ranged attacks on melee enemies even in a pitched battle where the other side's ranged fighters are taking full advantage of it? You'll lose, needlessly. That's like saying that if a paladin is fighting a rogue, he must first take off his heavy armor, because that gives him an unfair advantage...of course the rogue will keep all the advantages HE has, but the paladin must have none.
Advantage is not the same as "bypassing" the fight. If the Paladin's armor made him literally invulnerable to the Rogue, then it would probably be dishonorable to fight him with that armor on. And, in the first example, the Paladin could bring his ranged attack on ranged enemies without any loss of honor.

But will you "lose needlessly" in some situations? Sure. I mean, that's the situation that even Cedric walked into! He knew his side was going to lose, and that he was going to die needlessly. Do I think the Paladin needed to be there? No, I don't. But sometimes that's the case; as a Paladin, you abide to a code that limits you. I mean, if using poison was the only thing that would weaken an enemy enough to maybe beat it, it should be used right? To a Paladin, the answer is no. The same goes for cheating, lying, and the like. Perfectly reasonable weapons of war are outlawed here; of course the Paladin has it harder.
And that IS arbitrary, it IS a rule that makes no logical sense and exists on an abstract whim.
Well, I cited the definition, so you'll forgive me if I still disagree.
What if your paladin is only equipped with a ranged weapon and the other guy has a sword? should he fight bare handed because his code dictates he must not have an advantage, which means in this circumstance he must artificially give himself a DISadvantage?
I'm going to tackle these one at a time, because they don't seemingly all have the same answer.

As for this situation, yes, he should use what he can, but not his ranged weapon if it'll bypass the fight (if the enemy can clearly take it, I'd consider it fair game). Disarm the enemy, pick up a rock, hit him with your crossbow, use your gauntlets; do something.
What if an enemy challenges a paladin to a duel with weapons that the enemy is an expert with but the paladin has never used before? is the paladin obligated to accept this challenge?
Probably not, no (if there are no other stakes, then no, he's not).
if you say he should not "bypass combat" then yes he is.
No, since no combat has occurred. It's not "cannot bypass all places where combat might take place." It's "in a combat, not use a weakness so powerful that the combat itself is simply skipped due to that weakness."
This seems ridiculous to me, and extremely exploitable, enemies could simply force a paladin to always fight them only at the thing they're best at, a situation where in every individual aspect of combat, the paladin must always artificially handicap himself in the areas where he's better to be "equal" while retaining the full penalty of all his disadvantages, which will make the paladin in total weaker than his foe every time. That's obviously unreasonable.
A Paladin doesn't need to fight like this, but often will. The reason being, simply, that others will "cheat", "use poison", "lie", and the like. He can try to see through the lies, he can try to not be poisoned, he can try to not be cheated, but he cannot make up for that disadvantage. He will always be at a disadvantage to anybody that capitalizes on the idea of "all's fair in war (mostly)". It's already ingrained into the Paladin class. It is a handicap.
As an example, Aragorn is very paladin-like, a paragon of just and noble kingship. Was it dishonorable of him to save Minas Tirith by calling the Oathbreakers into battle? Obviously they gave him an enormous advantage, they were ghosts, thus intangible and unable to be harmed by the living and, depending on whether you're looking at the books or the movies, either scared Sauron's armies into disarray and often literally to death, or slaughtered them wholesale while taking full advantage of their incorporeality.
It probably was dishonorable, yes. Which, again, people in-game probably argue at length on whether or not that matters! That's the difference between a Lawful Good Fighter (or Cleric, even), and a Paladin. You can be Lawful Good and act with dishonor occasionally. It won't push you to Neutral Good, necessarily. The Paladin in the same situation would likely be Lawful Good still, but he'd lose his powers (again, from where I sit).
You say that you don't consider it inherently dishonorable to attack an enemy's weak spot, but the groin is a "cheap shot". what makes it a cheaper shot than a shot at any other weak point? It's not somehow easier or less skilled, a skilled enemy is perfectly capable of protecting it, by wearing armor there, by using his shield, or any number of other means. So what's the problem?
Because normally (and from the fiction, it looks like), it basically set the enemy up to be completely defenseless, from which point he was slaughtered. The fight was bypassed by hitting that weak point. Hopefully my post up to this point shows why I see this as "dishonorable".
I'd also point out that nothing anywhere in the rules has said a paladin may not "skip combat",
Ah, but that's not what I was talking about. Again, I hope my post has made that more clear.
n fact in many cases, I would see a paladin as morally obligated to try to avoid unnecessary bloodshed, to try to negotiate settlements between enemies where neither side is truly evil, to offer redemption to the wicked as an alternative to violence, a paladin is a high charisma class for a reason. even attempting stealth to enter an enemy stronghold instead of charging in the front door is often a very paladin-like thing to do because it allows the paladin to avoid needlessly taking the lives of guards who are only trying to do their jobs and likely are unaware of and uninvolved in any evil being plotted by their employer. In fact, the book of exalted deeds offers "ravages and afflictions" which are basically good aligned poisons paladins are allowed to use, so that they would have a full range of combat options available to them without the unnecessarily cruel implications of poison.
Avoiding unnecessary bloodshed I'm okay with. Stealth I'm okay with (probably most of the time). The "ravages and afflictions" I'm not okay with, and I know I'm not the only one. Those are poison. But, if I accepted the book (I used the Core 3), then yeah, I'd likely have to accept them.

As an aside, I just wanted to say thanks for the interesting, civil, and thorough posts to me. Considering you've had just 3 posts, I feel pretty special. As always, play what you like :)
 

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