D&D 5E What to do about flakes?!

Eltab

Lord of the Hidden Layer
When I was DM'ing Tiamat, we went through the White Wyrmspeaker chase during IRL Summer Break. I think I was the only person who was there for the entire chapter. The group still somehow managed to get everything done, even if an under-manned evening only cleared one room.
 

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Uchawi

First Post
My friends are not replaceable.
I would argue in the context of a game they are. Not all my friends share the same interests and if they do they will make a serious effort as a friend to participate. I am not talking one-offs, but consistently finding excuses to not play. At that point, I just assume my friend has other interests we can enjoy, and D&D is not one of them.
 

Morrus

Well, that was fun
Staff member
I would argue in the context of a game they are. Not all my friends share the same interests and if they do they will make a serious effort as a friend to participate. I am not talking one-offs, but consistently finding excuses to not play. At that point, I just assume my friend has other interests we can enjoy, and D&D is not one of them.

For me, the game serves my friends; they don’t serve it. They’re busy people with kids and stuff - it’s not like they have tons of time to do the other stuff either. Our weekly game is the only chance we all really get to see each other.
 

jgsugden

Legend
My overall suggestion is to sit down with all of the players and talk about what the group expectations are for how often people will be able to make it, and how often people can miss due to emergencies and other events. A player that has too many emergencies may have very good reasons to have those emergencies, but they are still disrupting a game by not being there and may not be a good fit for a weekly game. They may be better suited to a game that means less frequently.

However, even when you have everyone dedicated and not prone to emergencies, emergency still arise. My Group has a rule that if we are missing one player we NPC that character for that session, but if two are missing we switch to board games. There are a lot of amazing board games out there these days that are just as fun as D&D. You might miss out on advancing the story for an extra week which can be really painful when you're at a really fun part of the story, can be amazingly fun. if you don't own any board games created in the last 15 years, I suggest you go to the website called BoardGameGeek and look for some suggestions. Lords of Waterdeep, Gloomhaven and Terraforming Mars are all great games for a D&D group to enjoy when a player is out.
 

Uchawi

First Post
For me, the game serves my friends; they don’t serve it. They’re busy people with kids and stuff - it’s not like they have tons of time to do the other stuff either. Our weekly game is the only chance we all really get to see each other.
Fair enough. I have run into the same situation. Part of the challenge of friends is finding the right mix. More often that not, we just choose something else to do. Obviously friends is a very personal issue so I can see where my statements needed a little more explanation.
 


Harzel

Adventurer
Lan-"in other news, legislators today introduced a per-character gaming tax..."-efan

Yeah, and it is level-based: the higher level your character, the more you pay. When someone objected, they just said they were bringing back the old 'gold for XP' rule.
 

For me, the game serves my friends; they don’t serve it. They’re busy people with kids and stuff - it’s not like they have tons of time to do the other stuff either. Our weekly game is the only chance we all really get to see each other.

Yes. Much of it depends on what stage of your life you are in. University students flaking out on each other will probably be taken differently than middle ages games with families and careers.
 

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