Player Telling Other Player How To Play Their Character

[Flower Hugger]

1. What's your thought about a player telling other player how to play their character?2. As a DM, how would you resolve this issue?3. Is having a character with a boring background or playing him boring is a legitimate to tell him how to play his character? If you wonder if this happen to me before, yes it did. Thank you for reading this thread and I'll gladly read your input on this subject.

 

[The Crimson Binome]

It's not so much a rule as it is a question of etiquette, but telling someone how to play their character is generally considered to be the rudest thing you can do. It's their character, so however they're playing it is the correct way. If they aren't following the alignment or background they have written down, as you interpret them, then either you are reading it wrong or the wrong thing is written down.

The only times when such criticism is warranted is when it would violate the meta-rules of the group (e.g. if the group says you can't kill children, because it hits too close to home for some of the players); or if the player doesn't understand the setting, and the DM needs to set the player straight.

I had an issue at the beginning of my campaign with one player who wanted to play a recreational drug user, which is flat-out not something that could happen in my setting, so I had to correct the player.

 

[Sadras]

Firstly welcome to Enworld!
1. (a) A player offering advise to another player is perfectly acceptable. (b) A player teasing another player's roleplaying style or actions happens. (c) A player demanding another player change the way they roleplay is not cool.

2. (a) Allow it. (b) Ensure that the teasing doesn't negatively effect the player being teased or the game. If it does, speak to the player who is teasing to tone it down. Everyone has different sensitivity levels. (c) Tell the player to stop.

Offering advice is free whether the character has a boring backround or roleplaying style or not.
Being pushy with your opinion or forcing the issue that it negatively effects the other player and/or the environment at the table is not fun and therefore not good for the game.

 

[Morrus]

I think the only real consideration is whether the player on the receiving end welcomes the advice or not. As with anything, if that player asks the other one to stop, and they don't, then it becomes a problem. I guess in an ideal world, the first player would ask "hey, would you be open to some suggestions?" and then leave it if the answer was "no".

Certainly telling someone their playing style is too boring goes beyond any reasonable social conduct unless it's clearly in jest and being welcomed as such.

I think it's just a basic social issue, same as any group setting - if someone is bothering someone else, it's a problem. If they're not, it's not. Without knowing the people involved and the group dynamic, it's hard to say; but you know it when you see it!

 

[Tyranthraxus]

I put it up there with

A) Telling the DM how to run his game.
B) Turning up Drunk to a game. Whilst Im a non drinker by choice I understand many enjoy some when they can. But Ive had people turning up to a game with kids in , drunk.

Telling someone how to play their character is the height of rudeness in my and many peoples views. Its an unspoken rule of gaming. The only thing as a player you have control over is the character you are playing as. Nothing else. IF you dont enjoy the way someone else is playing, you take it up with the dm after the game.

 

[Flower Hugger]

Certainly telling someone their playing style is too boring goes beyond any reasonable social conduct

I tried to explain it. There are players who just want to roll, relax, and enjoy the story by the DM. I think the last thing he wants to hear is how boring his background or he is not roleplaying enough. I been playing D&D since 2005 and I never experience such behavior in my entire life.

 

[S'mon]

The general etiquette is that it's very rude unless the player is clearly asking for advice. Maybe a player welcomes advice on what their spells do, but they still need to be the one deciding which spell to cast. 'Advice' can easily become patronising and annoying. "You are roleplaying your character wrong" seems very rude, though a player might need advice on setting elements & campaign tone.

 

[Flower Hugger]

Thank you for your replies, I'll try to use this a future reference incase I run into something similar in the future.
I hope future players and DMs look into this thread if they also find themselves in a similar situation.

I can't tell you how much your replies mean to me.

 

[delericho]

1. What's your thought about a player telling other player how to play their character?

As long as it's just player A advising player B, and as long as player B doesn't object to the advice, it's not a problem. Anything more than that, and it's a problem that should be dealt with.

2. As a DM, how would you resolve this issue?

Assuming it's a problem (see above), then speak to player A. Explain to him that he's causing a problem at the game, and ask him to stop. If it continues, tell him to stop. And if it still continues, uninvite him from the game.

3. Is having a character with a boring background or playing him boring is a legitimate to tell him how to play his character?

If the player in question is happy having a "boring" background then that's his prerogative. There are plenty of characters in fiction who have a boring background prior to starting their adventures (eg D'Argtanian, who was just a kid from a farm, without even the "son of Darth Vader" angle at play). What matters is what happens in the story at the table.

Now, if the player is playing in a boring manner, that may be a problem. Everyone at the table should be contributing to the fun of the group... or at least not detracting from it. And so the DM should speak to that player about it, and if the styles can't be resolved then the player should be removed. But it's not the job of another player to take action here.

 

[Toast]

I'm the player A in this situation. Flower Hugger linked me this as kind of a "Ha, people on the internet agree with me so you are wrong." In this game, the DM asked me to help him move the story and make stuff happen, through action or dialogue. This problem occured after the session was over for the night and everyone was preparing to leave. It's not that I was telling him how to play his character, it's that I was asking him if the choices he made were the right ones for his self description, class, and alignment. I asked the exact same of the other player in our subgroup.

The problem with this case is that this is the third session and other players have mentioned to him. Other players including literally everyone in our playgroup. Everyone in our group puts effort and energy into playing and he does not. It got to the point tonight where the DM tried to explain to Flower Hugger what all of the other players were wanting from him as a member of the group, and Flower Hugger ripped up his character sheet and threw it in the trash.

I have no problem with boring backgrounds, just boring players.