1000 Things Your Characters do if They Have Deathwishes

[DarkSoldier]

Any system, any game, any stupid course of action the PC's have taken that seem to suggest that these people just want to die.

1: Serve the dwarf barbarian a sarsparilla.
2: Pick the pockets of the old guy with the beard and pipe.
3: "Un-holy" the holy water in front of a fanatic paladin.
4: Have scrambled eggs out of the eggs in that "abandoned" dragon lair.
5: Roll up a paragon multi-headed anarchic fiendish winged tauric half-fire elemental... anything... in front of the DM.

 

[LGodamus]

6.Slap the DM and dare him to try and kill your character
7.attempt to "disarm" a sphere of annihilation with your rogue
8.Break your staff of power over your knee to show how tough you are
9.Call out that great wyrm black dracolich and challenge him to a one on one fight.....
10.Try to go toe to toe with UpperKrust's PC with your 3rd level bard

 

[megamania]

11. Ask the bartender to give you the strongest stuff he has. You drink it despite the label- Talona's Mixture

12. DM announces how long he spent on the adventure. You skip it or go on red herrins avioding it. Then laugh about it before said DM.

13. Pull the beard of a 20th level dwarf

14. Use a deck of Wonderous Things

15. Use it again since you did well the first time

 

[megamania]

16. Use a Potion of Dragon Control to call over adragon just to see if it really works.

17. Drink potions labeled as apprentise made

18. Wear full plate in a dingy with a leak in it

19. Call a drow a =CENSORED=

20. Date a vampire

 

[megamania]

21. Ask to play a plant person on Darksun (defiling)

22. Play an earth elemental in an underwater campaign

23. Tell the DM you played this adventure once and it was easy

24. Holy Avenger+5 or standard knife......I'll go with the knife

25. Play Darksun and DM says a group of cacti are ahead of you and you go right up to them mumbling how dangerous could a plant could ever be

 

[DMauricio]

26. State "Its only 10 kobolds, what's the most they can do"
27. Claim you can survive arrows shot by said 10 kobolds cause of the Deflect Arrows feat.
28. Agree to play RtToEE when only 1 PC in your group of 6 is higher than 6th Level. (Cause you've read the spoilers on ENWorld)
29. Expect to survive past 1 gaming session when asked to join in an Epic Level Campaign and you design: A feral half-illithid/half-celestial/half-troll/half-dragon pixie (with 12 hp due to high con) while everyone else is playing an epic level core race.
30. Name your dual scimitar wielding drow-elven ranger character in an FR campaign "Do'Urden" or some clearly obvious derrivative of your favourite twink.

 

[Shemeska]

31. Violate the cardinal rule of thou shalt not screw with an Archfiend, in any sense of the phrase whatsoever.... (one of my players violated this rule, and the fiend in question the other evening... *snicker*)

 

[Fenris]

32. Empty the clip in your grenade launcher, in one combat, aiming at the hordes chasing your buddies, right behind your buddies. Scatter rolls anyone? (Living Steel-Black Sword; they never let me use grenades again, ever, in any game)

 

[John Crichton]

33. Wear BBQ-flavored leather armor.

 

[The Allamistako]

34. Your 3rd level character sez "Sod you, what AC does Orcus have, anyway?
35. When playing Palladium Fantasy: Stryphon, eh? How bad can he be.
36. In Star Wars: Darth Who?
37. Sending your 1st Level Planescape character via a gate to the ninth layer of Baator, and when a Baatezu come, to say "Oi you, fat bloke with wings, do you know how I get back to Sigil?"

Been there, doen it all...

-Alla