Adventures of Darryl the stone sword

[jasper]

Dudes! The Bard is Sick. He is the original Super Freak. Let me explain. No too long! Let me sum up! The big mayor pig has declared martial law. And there isn't no Jackie Chan or former late night show host around. First all we spend the night with Ember corpse. Hello DEAD HUMANS smell worst than wet hippies.

Dudes then they send the bard out to find a way to hide the body. And bard blows it he gets hassle everywhere by the pigs. Finally he brings in the huge chest. And .
Dudes it sick.
It's awful.
They cram Ember the Smelly into the chest. And everyone lets the bard drag out the hall and down the stairs. Lucky the staff is dumber than house cats. One of the waiters helps load the chest into the wagon. He finds an empty warehouse and tosses the chest in.

Meanwhile Glimmer Gutless the Swift is chanting with his god. Lo and be hold Ma Bell comes through. Thirty seconds later the cleric of Pelor is holding four potions. This cool cleric is trying to OTHER people to drink the potions. Someone is a little slow on the trust in god kind here. Well Floppy and I stay at the inn and Tickle berry, Billing, Kill win, and Glimmer Gutless drink the potion. About a half hour later the flaming nightlight dies out from the Pelor temple. They return and tell us to collect our things. They have away out. I should have smelled trouble. But no one listen to me.

Half the party is invisible and the rest of us are trying to act cool. Billing the firebug waits to the pig patrol is out of sight. Then he and Kill win (ewwk break legs of the dead bad karma dudes) start a warehouse on fire! I hope it was not the one with Ember's corpse in it. Then Billing is tell everyone to jump in the manhole.

Dudes the sewer was tiny. Even the halflings were having trouble with the roof. I heard that adventuring can be a stinking job but there no reason to swim in it.

Well we make out near the halfling riverboat floats and bridge. The hot dogs don't bother us! I wish I could have been up wind of myself. Talk about raising a big stink. The party swims to other shore. And just we about to land. The river eats a dog. Never knew Elf Babe and Tickle beer could teleport! Of course we were all leaving brown stains behind.

Halfling grandma lets get a bath before we can lay down some patter about recruits. Granny does not dig it but her son does and the party turns up their nose at him. The party Dee Dees out to Hartford. Lays the cash down on Steward of Beer Hall they own him. Then they buy more war dogs. And Some how Kill win the bard gets Larry and most of his fighting school to join us. The boy can come off smooth. But now we got a halfling horde with a dog pack back up.
It been over seven days since we left Briniford I hope the mayor pig has choked on a doughnut. But we a mile away from that bridge and the party has not come up with a GOOD plan to enter the town.

 

[Tickleberry]

Continued travails of Tickleberry and Co.


Well, we have the hobbit army following us, but we do not have a plan for getting back in the city. We discuss it along the way, and decide that we need to get across the river first. We sure don't want to do that under the watchful eyes of the city.

We decide to angle some rope across the river, and slide across. Floppy and the halforc monk that we picked up teleport across. I personally think that the monk and the paladin belong to some secret order, and when one gets tired, he swaps out with another.

I shoot an end across to them after we had tied off the other high up in a strong tree. We send the dogs across. No problem. We start sending the hobbit horde across, and this silver dragon swoops down and carries off one. Floppy has Daryl ask her why, and she "politely" responds "None of your business." Forgive me for thinking that having a Companion carried off is my business.
We again set up, and continue crossing, without interference from silly dragons.

We STILL don't have a plan for getting in. We debate forever until that blasted dragon shows back up. For a price, she'll deposit us in the city. Oh joy, trust a dragon that carried off one of ours? Well, I didn't have a better plan. Not with hellhounds prowling the base and watchers on the walls.

We have to go in shifts, and somehow, the rope that carries Floppy and company breaks. They fall. Floppy survives. We then see that the rope didn't break, it was cut. There is some speculation that Daryl is responsible. Remind me that I Never want to rely on that thing for my safety.

Now, we are back in the one place none of us really want to be, and we need a place to hide. Enter shady character. Lana talks to shady character. Shady character calls for guards. We dogpile him, and knock him unconscious. We split. Celwyn stays behind to confound the guards. I later hear the story he tells him, here it is: "I was minding my own business, pouring some water out the back door of the Happy Hobbit, and these guys yank me out, and pull me kicking and fighting down the street. I finally get them to let me go, and this is one of them."
They tell him to show up tomorrow with a fine, and they are going to escort him back.

Flash to us. We get to the Happy Hobbit, and take over. Billen has a few words with the proprietor, money changes hands, and Billen is the proprietor for the night. Lana, pretending to be a innworker, answers the door with "What happened to you?"
Celwyn again goes into his story, and repeats it when Billen, as worried innkeeper, shows up. They leave him with us, reminding him about his day in court on the morrow.

Celwyn finds an awful surprise awaiting him at court. He is taken into custody. He asks to know why. It turns out the guy we beat up is a close, personal friend of Lurch. When they finally do show him his accuser, his answer is ready. "That's not him!"
Since the guy never laid eyes on him, and the guards found us waiting to claim him at the Happy Hobbit, all they can do is take the rest of his money, and send him on his way. Wait, there's more.

Remember that empty wharehouse we left Amber's remains in? It wasn't empty, or abandoned. It belonged to the Thieves Guild, and they want lots of money for the stinkbomb we left them. Lana bails him out. Wait, there's more.

Celwyn and Lana want to find out what is going on at the mansion. Lana dresses as a peasant maid, while Celwyn wears a butler's uniform. You'd think after his numerous close calls he'd know better, but NOOO!

No one is interested in Lana, more fools them, but Celwyn is another matter. The head honcho wants to see him. It ain't Lurch. Somebody starts playing around in his head. Daryl, that aggrevating sword, finally does something right. It seems he can go in people's heads, too. He tells the rest of us that he's in trouble. Now, the party really starts.

By hook and crook, Celwyn gets out by going through a window, on the second story, after seeing what we're really up against. Panic sets in among all the other aspirants to domestic service due Celwyn's efforts to get free, and head for the gates out. Lana is mixed in with them. Floppy has Daryl change his form to a miniature Lurch, 'cause he can't do a full sized Lurch. He then teleports with me, Billen, the gnome, and the monk. The hobbit horde has to come the long way. More on them, later.

Guards are everywhere, and they are firing crossbows. Celwyn is invisible, and featherfalling down. He makes a phantom of himself (I later learn) that draws his sword to back up against the wall. Lana is firing where she may, and is making for the porticullis wench. I follow suit once there. Lana almost skewers Floppy in disguise. Fighting is going on everywhere.

Enter the glowing lions (hellcats). One starts chomping on Billen, and the other takes after the gnome. There are still guards up and firing. Floppy wins to Billen's side, just as he goes down. He puts a freeze on the thing, and the monk rips its throat out. I am firing on the one that is chomping on the gnome, but it doesn't seem to be doing any good. The monk grapples the thing, and between Lana and myself, we kill it. Somewhere in all this, we take out the rest of the guards. We do some healing, just in time to find Lurch, and what is left of the hobbit horde, ONE.

Well, the monk grapples Lurch, and we kill him like we killed the blooming hellcat. Rather anticlimatic, isn't it. However, we now know he isn't the head honcho. Celwyn doesn't tell us until we are "safely" back at the Happy Hobbit.

That's why I'm laying here now, teeth chattering, in my bunk. It was gray, and had tentacles on its face. Oh lord, save me from an entrenched mindflayer. I can't help thinking what else it might have learned from Celwyn's mind. I think I'd rather take my chances with a whole church full of Lurches.

 

[jasper]

Dudes short cheecks is mostly right.
The dragon Silverly agreed to airlift us into the city. Hey we were the 101 airborne div make that the 55.5 air borne company. Every thing was going okay until the dragon cut the rope. Short trip to the ground took out 3 dogs and 2 halflings.
Larry was one of survivors against Lurch. Hello dudes and dudettes. This party is training for the sucide squad. No tells Larry or his students magic items are needed to put a hurting on Lurch.
The other survivor is a pimple face halfing who may have just turned 16 and has a crush on Tickle beer. The rest is pretty much as ticklebrandy bucket of chicken describes.

Let see if I have the totals right.
Party
One big roman candle doused
two lurches
three evil clerics
4 hell hounds
2 hot cats
7 guards

one missing halforc
One Ember the unconisusous slightly smelly.
a dozen dogs mashed.
a half dozen or six of kind hobbit jam
And a pale paladin hiding under the covers.

 

[Tickleberry]

Hang on a minute, dang it!


1. Somehow, I doubt your numbers, brokenblade. For one thing, there's no mention of the things that killed Ember, remember all those grimlocks? Then there's all those beasties that were PROTECTING the first lurch, and that ogre mage, and those thieves, and the wererats, not to mention that DRAGON! So yeah, I DO have a problem with your calculations. Do try to keep up, needlenose.

2. What do you mean, there's two that survived? We searched the remains of the fight, found all accounted for, so how did he make it, hmm? You do realize that we find his sudden appearance at least suspect? Heaven help him if he actually does anything. AND IF HE IS FOR REAL, WHY HIM?

 

[jasper]

Dudes bummer man
Killwin the bard is toast. Literally the spaghetti mouth dude thought he was a fish and ate him.
Man what is with this party and dead people.
Tickle berry has a ghoul friend
Tickle berry has a ghoul friend
Tickle berry has a ghoul friend
Tickle berry has a ghoul friend
Tickle berry has a ghoul friend
Tickle berry has a ghoul friend
Man oh man this is bummer. The only good singer gone.

Well after fighting lurch and his kitty cats. And Joesy was not around at all. The group retreated to the Happy Hobbit for some munchies and sleep. We were doing okay till the dragon flew over and land some where south of us. Floppy and Elf babe wanted to check it our but the group dis them and when back to bed. Just as we were falling asleep Tickle berry got deep into the sprints. You remember we hired the Halfling Horde of Harstford. Well I forgot to mention Charlie Furry Foot. A pimple face sixteen year old, he had a crush on Tickle brandy. Well as we were fighting the kitty cats, Lurch made paste out of him.

Well about ten p. m. the boy walks through the door. Dudes I said he walked through the door, he didn?t open it or anything. Plus he is kind of pale. And then he starts talking about his true love of Brandy Beer. Dudes there goes the halfling thief leaving brown spots on the floor. Well Charles in Charge is going on about marrying Tickle beer and the chick is freaking. Man I never seen a halfling?s foot fur stand on end. Billin and Killwin were getting into the spirit of the moment especially when Charlie ask the bard to be his best man. Billin offer to give the bride away. Finally the gnome lay out some major mojo and Charlie took a hike to wherever ghost rest.

The next morning the dragon lands again to the north of us. Killwin decides to go to barnes and nobles for new songbooks. He mumbles something about B?s and G?s, and Pat bending a guitar. The group arrives at the store and a party is going on the third floor. Just as we peek in the front window a huge purple worm is gated in. As these kids are standing there with their mouths open, a babe in house slippers climbs out of the foggy third floor and walks up the wall to the roof. And then disappears to the rear. Well the worm starts up the stairs to the second floor and the party starts up their. Finally the group starts the party on the ground floor and then the party ends with us in the basement.

Killwin and the group shop lift a couple of books and rifle the dead bodies. They don?t notice the party has not attracted the attention of the man.

Dudes where is the pizza.
After they go for pizza and soda. They decide to crash the manor. Tickle beer climbs the north wall and aces the guard. We go over the wall and start into the back door of the mayor?s pad. When big dog decides to see if we have any Scobby snacks. The gnome slaps the door in its face. And Killwin proclaims it was an illusion. Just as we about to go up the stairs, wolfie is back. Killwin smiles and proclaims,?guys it just a illusion. Watch. ?

He starts to pet the wolf illusion,? Nice doggie. Nice ?.? Killwin is no longer smiling. ?NICE DOGGIE!? and the party starts. Well Billin and the two dwarves appear to allergic to the dog fur. They run over Tickle beer to get up the stairs. Of course they decide to start their own party up stairs.

Upstairs they find spaghetti mouth and another wolf. Spaghetti mouth lays some heavy thoughts on the dwarves and they start drooling. Downstairs Tickle, Kilwin and Glim lay so serious hurt on Marmduke. When they come upstairs, Billin is fleeing the scene. And spaghetti mouth is floating ten feet in the air. Groovy. The party starts up big time. And when it ends spaghetti mouth thinks Killwin is Antipasta and departs the scene.

Well the Mayor man is all happy that we remove his unwanted advisor. He lays out some heavy coin to the group. Opens the gates to the town and proclaim us protectors of the city. The dragon says she owns us a favor. And that she will help advise the mayor.

Tickleberry was sad at the lost of Killwin. I guess she wanted him to sing at her wedding.

?So ends the Speaker in the Dreams module. No more spoilers since the group has decide to go play with out modules.?

 

[Tickleberry]

There you go again needlenose

Just once I would like you to get the story right, but then, the world might end. I mean really, is your mind so gone? For one, yes, I did freak when the ghost geek showed, but you sure didn't see brown spots. Contrary to wireboy's words, I have never disgraced myself so.

Alright, to start where I had left off. I was shivering in my bedroll, when it was time for me to take my duty shift. I got up, and heard a familiar voice asking to be let in. I thought it might be a mindflayer's trick, and said no. We counted bodies, nobody was left unaccounted for. Then, he literally walks through the door.

Man, until that moment, I only thought I had done some amazing somersaults. I think I must have shrieked, because everyone was suddenly up. Once they got a load of what the little ghost wanted, the teasing started, and has yet to stop. Celwyn offered a suggestion for the little ghost to prove himself.

He thought he was still alive! We couldn't convince him otherwise. I told him he could at least go check out the castle for us. Forget it, he wasn't having any of it. Then he wanted to get a little too close. I finally got the stupid gnome to quit snorkling long enough to banish him. Sheesh, the things I go through for this party.

Celwyn, before he died, told me about an interesting dream he had. The mindflayer visited him, and left a vision of us all dead. Isn't that an irony? The creature didn't know where we were, and was trying to get a fix on us. Luckily, Celwyn figured it out in time, and fed him misinformation. I hope that thing rots in the deepest of nine hells.

The next day, we go information hunting. Oh, not to leave out what we already had, we found messages and useful scrolls tacked on our door when we came home. Then, most of the warnings had been taken care of. For some reason, Celwyn decides that it is past time to check some of the warnings out, and maybe find information to fight the mindflayer with. Whoa, what we found when we got there.

There was a major battle raging on the third floor. All kinds of explosions were going off, and then this character came out. I thought it might be the silver dragon, but later learned it was a villan making her escape. Too soon, we had a purple worm to contend with.

I picked careful shots, while the fighters tried to close, and had really hurt the thing bad, when Celwyn takes out his crossbow. He carelessly takes a shot, and kills it. What I go through, sheesh.
Darryl informs us that there are some other problems downstairs in the basement, two sorcerors and a gibbering mouther, to be precise.

Everyone was crowded up on the stairs, so I slid down the banister, and tied up one of the sorcerors, hoping that they'd take out the other and the mouther before I was toast. It worked.
The two new dwarves just plowed through the mouther, and then swatted the sorceror (with tactical strikes from the bard keeping them alive). Just in time to rescue me.

Well, the building was now secure, and we searched in earnest for anything on mindflayers. Fat chance, the place had been picked over, but Celwyn's informants turned up some rather useful information about the manor: It was just about empty.

Get this: the best plan they could come up with had me sneaking over the back wall, leaving a rope for them, and attacking the mindflayer from behind. that was it! Sheesh, think they had faith in my abilities? Well, Brandobaris was watching, 'cause I climbed up, set my grapple, and killed the one guard before anyone else noticed. In fact, the guard never knew I was there until he was dead. Never even got a chance to raise an alarm. I pity him, but I had a job that needed doing, and he was on the wrong team.

Everyone made it up with some semblance of quiet, and after unlocking the back door, I let the tanks walk in first. Nothing went kaboom, so I entered, and starting checking for booby traps. (Considering the number of boobies I'm looking after, I'd better.)

Anyway, the gnome is the last one in, and he's being chased by a gigantic wolf. The bard, being the cool person he was, passed his hand right through it, showing it to be an illusion.

Then one shows up on the stairs as we are climbing up. Celwyn says "Oh look, another illusion. . . Nice doggie" It's real. It was so comical, the poor bard there patting this huge slavering wolf. I get barrelled over by the chicken dwarves and Billen, leaving the gnome, Celwyn, and myself to take the thing out. Luckily, I'm very handy with a bow, and we kill the durned thing. Just in time to join the party upstairs.

Here's where things get nasty. There's another one of those wolves, and I guess the things have something akin to dragon fear on them. I never notice myself. Billen is fleeing, and the floating mindflayer has bounced the dwarves' brains about. I fire at him, and the wolf, and get blasted myself.

When I wake up, I'm told the Mindflayer took Celwyn. The dwarves woke up, Billen was able to come back after the wolf was destroyed, but not in time to save him. He's gone.

Well, I tracked that silver dragon down, and asked her flat out if she knew how to plane shift. She said no. I asked if she knew anybody who could. No. Well, I'm still looking, because that thing took too many friends for me to just let it go. And don't think that I've given up on my friends. There's miracles in this old world, and you can bet your sweet patooty that this little hobbit is going to find three: Celwyn, Ember and Burke.