I'm a little lost. Please help.

[merelycompetent]

Ok, lets say that three people are in a game... <snip>... In the end, I was called both a powergamer and a rules lawyer and two of them quit. I feel pretty upset by this. In the course of the "conversation" they also said that I dominate all the role playing. I feel that they just dont roleplay much at all and its easy to dominate when youre the only one participating. I wont make underpowered characters with short life spans on purpose and I can't not roleplay to the best of my ability. I dont want this to happen again. Any thoughts?

This is general advice. I don't know the particulars of your group, and I'm certainly not making judgements on so little information. This is the best advice I can offer with what I know of your situation.

* Don't hog the DM's attention. If you're the only one who gets stuff done because you're the only one talking to the DM, settle down, and let other players get their half hour of DM time. Yes, it's exciting. Yes you want to ~do~ stuff, interact with NPCs, and situations. But so do the other players, and you are oblidged to give them their shine time. I know I've had to sit on my hands and stuff chips in my mouth (hard to do without hands and when extra hot salsa is involved) so I'd shut up long enough for others to have their turn in certain games (If you're reading this Will, and the name Vortac has meaning for you, you can start smirking now).

* Don't try to handle interpersonal issues during the game. If someone else starts in on you, tell them that you'll be happy to talk about it after the game, or tomorrow, but you don't want to waste everyone's time dealing with a personal matter. If multiple players start in on you, you may have to seriously consider walking out. There is no reason to take abuse on your fun night.

* Always be polite. Some people, IME usually male but YMMV, reflexively view politeness as weakness. Politeness actually gives you the moral and ethical high ground, and prevents the disagreement from dissolving into pointless name-calling. Politeness tends to encourage politeness. I don't mean have every statement filled with sticky sweetness, mother-may-I. I do mean say Please, and Thank You.

* Compliment others on the cool stuff they do. Don't be a suck-up. A simple, "Cool move, dude!" or equivalent works. (Aaagh! I've gotten old!)

* Don't play against your own team.

* Never tolerate the presence of a jerk.

Finally, a few (over-generalized) thoughts:

Frontline fighters are supposed to be the focused damage dealers. They pick one or two opponents, and smack them down. Getting upset over the frontline fighters doing their job is foolish.

Spellcasters are the mass damage dealers. They soften up the opposition, or buff the frontline fighters, so the bad guys go down easier. Note that in 3Ed, clerics can buff themselves up to be great frontline fighters... for a time.

Powergamer, rules lawyer, and dominating role-playing in one person are mutually exclusive in 99.999% of the gamer population. Even I'm not that messed up. So you can safely discard that collection of accusations.

All things being equal, walking out on a game because one player got the last shot in and whacked all the bad guys is silly.

And frankly, if you were a player in a game I was in, I'm all in favor of your character being the meat shield while my character stands back and cheers you on. Plus, being the public face, the assassins we attract (due to my character's activities) will go after yours first. Just make sure your character screams loud enough before dying to warn mine that they're coming, ok?

I hope this helps.

 

[fusangite]

I have to second what Altamont Ravenard has said. The advice I would give is kind of dependent on the ages of the gamers in question. I mean no offense by this; I just remember that the social strategies I used when I was a gamer in my teens were different than I use today. Because this sounds more like a social problem than an actual game problem, this information seems important.

 

[Numion]

To me it sounds like some of the players need to grow up a little bit.

C'mon, nobody likes to have their kills stolen! Especially 8 times in a row!

 

[amethal]

C'mon, nobody likes to have their kills stolen! Especially 8 times in a row!

Tell the other players :-

"Don't think of it as losing. Think of it as being beaten by a girl!"

 

[Steverooo]

Sadly, it is my experience that, when you have one very involved player, and other less-involved ones, that the less-involved PCs will pick on the more-involved one. I think this is basically a "TAKE A BACK SEAT, BUDDY!" signal... You were out-roleplaying AND out-fighting them, and they were thinking you were hogging the spotlight. I don't think that you were, but I do think that that was their problem.

 

[librarius_arcana]

Ok, lets say that three people are in a game. One playing a rogue, one playing a caster and one playing a cleric who wont heal people, but instead trys to be a frontline fighter and uses all his spells to buff himself. The DM tells me that a frontline fighter is needed. I bring in a frontline fighter. The very frst encounter is with 8 NPC's. Each is about a CR4 from what I can see and we are level 6. Between my greatsword good stats and lots of good rolls I could cleave off of, I killed every one of them. I didnt do all the damage but I got in the last hit on them all. The other players got pissed because they didnt actually drop anything and I did. They tried to cite various rules in an attempt to nerf my character and I responded with what I thought was right and the DM sided with me on almost everything. In the end, I was called both a powergamer and a rules lawyer and two of them quit.

Okay let me get abreast of the issue cuz I don't want to make a boob, (you should have flashed and been dating the DM, double whamie )

At the end of the day Is this an just EXP thing?
(because they should have been grateful for dealing with the problem)

I feel pretty upset by this. In the course of the "conversation" they also said that I dominate all the role playing. I feel that they just dont roleplay much at all and its easy to dominate when youre the only one participating. I wont make underpowered characters with short life spans on purpose and I can't not roleplay to the best of my ability. I dont want this to happen again. Any thoughts?

I've had that (not many times but a few) if you don't play in a muted way it seems you "dominate" just by being active, and unless you are really hyperactive the problem is theirs,

 

[librarius_arcana]

C'mon, nobody likes to have their kills stolen! Especially 8 times in a row!

Maybe but thats more of a system problem than a player issue,
What are you meant to do?, let the fighter soften them up so the rogue can finish them off?

Why?, she was just doing what a fighter does,
if they didn't like it they could play fighters as well,

 

[Fishbone]

This is a time when the Fighter clearly dominated...
BECAUSE THE FIGHTER WAS SUPPOSED TO DOMINATE!!!
I'm guessing the DM saw that you were a combat beast and wanted you to get your jollies by Cleaving through some mooks. When the Rogue gets to pile on sneak attack dice on a lone foe or the Cleric rules some undead or the creature with a lot of DR is put down by the wizard what do they expect you to do? Bitch that your kills were stolen? You had the spotlight because the situation most likely was designed to put it on you, either inherently or by the DM. Ask the DM to give the other players their shot to shine next time and it will all even out.

 

[moritheil]

If these people are going to freak out over something like that (oh no! Dread competence rears its head!), just be grateful that they did so this early so you know what sessions with them will be like.

 

[Olaf the Stout]

Try and get all the players back to play another session. Promise that you won't steal their kills. When combat starts, stand at the back of the group and offer words of encouragement but don't actually fight. If anyone attacks you just use full defence. When they all complain that they died because of you, tell them that you didn't what to steal any more kills from them.

Or

Try and get all the players back to play another session. Whine when another character casts a spell because your Fighter can't do that. Complain that it's not fair that the rogue gets so many skill points. Moan when the cleric turns undead because nothing happened when you pointed your holy symbol at them. Gripe about the fact that the barbarian and monk can move faster than you, etc., etc.

Gee, who would have thought that the fighter would be good at fighting. He roolz way too hard. Why would anyone bother playing anything else. And why is roleplaying and interacting with? He should just be saying "Me fighter. Me smash! Grrrrrrrrrrr." I mean really, your character is obviously broken.

Olaf the Stout