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IRON DM revival!
- Thread starter incognito
- Start date
incognito
First Post
the stories are in!
hello posters - glad to see both stories are up early! Makes my job all the more eeeevil...I mean...easy
I have finished my eval of seasong's scecnario, and am looking now at ladyofdragons.
Before I post my comments. I'd lie to see who is ready to go against Wicht for the next pairing.
hello posters - glad to see both stories are up early! Makes my job all the more eeeevil...I mean...easy
I have finished my eval of seasong's scecnario, and am looking now at ladyofdragons.
Before I post my comments. I'd lie to see who is ready to go against Wicht for the next pairing.
incognito
First Post
Round 1 judging!
For the first round of competition we have two good entries, so it seems, no matter who advances, the competition will be tough
Getting down to brass tacks…
Starting in order of appearance: seasong!
Let’s start with what is great about seasong’s submission, and there is a lot to like. The realism of the orc tribe. She includes elements of language, cruel gambling, coming of age ceremonies, slavery, simple economics, and the orc’s ancestors, giving this particular tribe a very real feel. We don’t wonder (as I often do when reading mini adventures), what motivates them. They are evil with a small “e.”
Another piece of particularly good work in this adventure is the versatility of the plot hooks! (4!!) Even though I am not a big fan of the ‘wish” hook, I can make this adventure fit in to almost any adventuring party – very well done, seasong! Stealing the gauntlet indeed!
We are left with a few questions, like: How did the slave, Irene, wrestle the spiked gauntlet from the Orc ancestors? Why don’t they take it back? How exactly do the slaves go about getting a chance to get to the top of the mountain for freedom? Why doesn’t the Ravid die of exposure? What CR 10 lawful outsider grants wishes?
This does lead me to a few of the scenario’s shortcomings. Of all the ingredients, the Ravid and the teleport seemed tacked on, an afterthought. It’s certainly an interesting use of “unable to be flanked” - that I will grant you. But the bonus teleport, and to have yet another mysterious spirit on top of the mountains, with a ravid guradian leaves a little to be desired. You already have the spirits of the ancestors, and the spirit of Irene. What you need is the spirit of a realtor to divvy up the ethereal land better in that mountain range!
Moving on to: ladyofdragons
What we have here is a lovely story that almost tells itself! Rich in history, and fleshed out with a good variety of NPCs, this story has a decidedly Asian feel to it in my mind – the mark of a good tale, by the way, is good visualization. Warring clans of monks, the enigmatic death of the Phoneix leader, a Staff of Law (Thomas Covenant, anyone?) leave the reader (typically the DM) with a rich series of scenes in his head, which helps flesh out an adventure.
Unfortunately, the gooey goodness ends there. More than seasong’s submission, this adventure feels forced. The hooks are harder to bite on, and the events that are supposed to lead the adventurers from one place to he next can easily break down. What happens if the obscuring mist does not stop the party (druids with animal friends & blindsight? Dispel Magic?). Also in the final scene, I am left with the impression that the assembled NPCs Jinak (mnk6/Assn6) CR:12, and Ten-fan (Wiz5/Mnk4) CR:9 would mop up a measly CR5 Ravid, without the barbarians, even if forced to use subdual only.
Also we have a few rules issues. Staves cannot be recharged. The speed of an animated object is 30’ not 60’ blah, blah. I’m not so concerned about those as I am concerned with the party being killed in encounter1 (5, 5th level Monks)! That’s EL9? For a L6 party? Not to mention trying to fight Jinak later on. Finally we have the omission of an ingredient: What cannot be flanked? I noticed none of the barbarians were L5…so, what happened?
Based on these observations, and some gut feelings about how playable a scenario is vs how well the writer used all the ingredients specified , I award this round to:
SEASONG
Note: The boards are ugly and slow…if this continues, I will have to delay the next pairing until tomorrow AM, or late tonight…
For the first round of competition we have two good entries, so it seems, no matter who advances, the competition will be tough
Getting down to brass tacks…
Starting in order of appearance: seasong!
Let’s start with what is great about seasong’s submission, and there is a lot to like. The realism of the orc tribe. She includes elements of language, cruel gambling, coming of age ceremonies, slavery, simple economics, and the orc’s ancestors, giving this particular tribe a very real feel. We don’t wonder (as I often do when reading mini adventures), what motivates them. They are evil with a small “e.”
Another piece of particularly good work in this adventure is the versatility of the plot hooks! (4!!) Even though I am not a big fan of the ‘wish” hook, I can make this adventure fit in to almost any adventuring party – very well done, seasong! Stealing the gauntlet indeed!
We are left with a few questions, like: How did the slave, Irene, wrestle the spiked gauntlet from the Orc ancestors? Why don’t they take it back? How exactly do the slaves go about getting a chance to get to the top of the mountain for freedom? Why doesn’t the Ravid die of exposure? What CR 10 lawful outsider grants wishes?
This does lead me to a few of the scenario’s shortcomings. Of all the ingredients, the Ravid and the teleport seemed tacked on, an afterthought. It’s certainly an interesting use of “unable to be flanked” - that I will grant you. But the bonus teleport, and to have yet another mysterious spirit on top of the mountains, with a ravid guradian leaves a little to be desired. You already have the spirits of the ancestors, and the spirit of Irene. What you need is the spirit of a realtor to divvy up the ethereal land better in that mountain range!
Moving on to: ladyofdragons
What we have here is a lovely story that almost tells itself! Rich in history, and fleshed out with a good variety of NPCs, this story has a decidedly Asian feel to it in my mind – the mark of a good tale, by the way, is good visualization. Warring clans of monks, the enigmatic death of the Phoneix leader, a Staff of Law (Thomas Covenant, anyone?) leave the reader (typically the DM) with a rich series of scenes in his head, which helps flesh out an adventure.
Unfortunately, the gooey goodness ends there. More than seasong’s submission, this adventure feels forced. The hooks are harder to bite on, and the events that are supposed to lead the adventurers from one place to he next can easily break down. What happens if the obscuring mist does not stop the party (druids with animal friends & blindsight? Dispel Magic?). Also in the final scene, I am left with the impression that the assembled NPCs Jinak (mnk6/Assn6) CR:12, and Ten-fan (Wiz5/Mnk4) CR:9 would mop up a measly CR5 Ravid, without the barbarians, even if forced to use subdual only.
Also we have a few rules issues. Staves cannot be recharged. The speed of an animated object is 30’ not 60’ blah, blah. I’m not so concerned about those as I am concerned with the party being killed in encounter1 (5, 5th level Monks)! That’s EL9? For a L6 party? Not to mention trying to fight Jinak later on. Finally we have the omission of an ingredient: What cannot be flanked? I noticed none of the barbarians were L5…so, what happened?
Based on these observations, and some gut feelings about how playable a scenario is vs how well the writer used all the ingredients specified , I award this round to:
SEASONG
Note: The boards are ugly and slow…if this continues, I will have to delay the next pairing until tomorrow AM, or late tonight…
ladyofdragons
First Post
oh well. congrats seasong.
btw, the Mnk6/Asn6 is a 6th level assasin, which is unable to be flanked.
btw, the Mnk6/Asn6 is a 6th level assasin, which is unable to be flanked.
ShadowWolf
First Post
what can't be flanked
a rogue ie the monk/assasin. can not be flanked that is why he is a main npc in ladyofdragons' entery. we had no access to the boards last night so were unable to clerify untill today
a rogue ie the monk/assasin. can not be flanked that is why he is a main npc in ladyofdragons' entery. we had no access to the boards last night so were unable to clerify untill today
incognito
First Post
Good Morning!
It is a birght and chilly day in Beantown!
I like PirateCat's suggestion of emailing me if the boards are slow.
LadyofDragons: I apologize - L6 Assassins indeed cannot be flanked. I must admit, I missed it. I do generally prefer to see the ingredients used or called out in a more direct manner. And reading your story was like reading a chapter in a good book, your descriptive skill are to be admired!
OK, folks, I need a competitor willing to take on the Wicht! Oh and Wicht, chime in of you are ready to go!
It is a birght and chilly day in Beantown!
I like PirateCat's suggestion of emailing me if the boards are slow.
LadyofDragons: I apologize - L6 Assassins indeed cannot be flanked. I must admit, I missed it. I do generally prefer to see the ingredients used or called out in a more direct manner. And reading your story was like reading a chapter in a good book, your descriptive skill are to be admired!
OK, folks, I need a competitor willing to take on the Wicht! Oh and Wicht, chime in of you are ready to go!
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