Let's read the entire run

[LordVyreth]

See, I love the "elves=cats" comparison, especially as a satirical concept. It explains how it takes elves centuries to do what humans can do in years, save for the rare elf that has the sense of commitment to adventure for a few years straight. All the others have distraction issues and bound off to commune with nature or compose poetry for a few decades.

In my cartoon universe, I took the idea even more literally. Elves would play with balls or string while simultaneously talking about how much better they are than you.

 

[(un)reason]

Dragon Magazine Issue 247: May 1998


part 1/8


124 pages. Who decided muddy green was a good idea as the primary colour for the cover? That's not going to stand out very well. Turn up the saturation! That'll keep it from looking too realistic. Yeah, I'm not too sure about this cover. Maybe it's another one that didn't scan well. Odd that the latest issues should have that problem more than the early ones. Maybe they were getting bored by the time they got this far. Well, we're almost at the end of the Archive issues. I shall definitely be interested in seeing how things change once we get past them. To the articles!


In this issue:


Tenchi Muyo! El-hazard! More classic anime out now and advertised here. Still no DVD's to save space with, I'm afraid.

Mage: the sorcerer's crusade! Another white wolf game gets it's historical edition.


The wyrms turn: Ahh, the great irony that a legend rarely seems legendary until it's over. This is certainly the case with Greyhawk, which was persistently a second stringer until it got cancelled. Yet they're coming back now, while Mystara, Spelljammer and the rest are down for the count. Really, this is just another reminder that they'd like to give plenty of support for the various dead campaign worlds in the magazine. But chances are, they'll actually wind up giving the Realms more support than everything else put together, because Ed shows no signs of running out of inspiration, and people are still showing plenty of interest in what he and his companions have to say. Theory, meet reality. You might not be the best of matches, but you'll have to learn how to get along with each other if you want to get anywhere in life.


D-Mail: A letter pointing out Rick Swan got the authors of his reviewed products mixed up. Tut tut. What do we pay these editors for?

A mostly positive point-by-point letter picking apart issue 243. That's my job! Well, apart from the positivity, anyway. You can keep that.

A letter encouraging you to give your magic weapons names and histories. People'll stick with something if you give it sentimental value, even if it's not the obvious choice. Unless they're ruthless twinks, and do you want to game with them anyway?

Two letters about Alternity and what should be done with it. One is optimistic enough about it's success to think it'll get it's own magazine. Oh, if only that were the case. If the hobby could support a whole bunch of magazines devoted to different systems, it'd be much healthier than it is.


Nodwick is introduced to the rest of the team. Signs continue to point to this being a bad gig. He ought to get out now while he has the chance.

 

[LordVyreth]

A letter encouraging you to give your magic weapons names and histories. People'll stick with something if you give it sentimental value, even if it's not the obvious choice. Unless they're ruthless twinks, and do you want to game with them anyway?

I don't really see names as helping with the problem. As long as there is a system where characters can find better weapons at random, they'll probably sell their old stuff and get the new ones. At least with later editions and lenient DMs, you can have the option of upgrading. "Hey, as long as we're in town, can I get someone to make my +2 sword +4? Sure." Though that weapon still wouldn't have earned something as cool as a name.

 

[(un)reason]

Dragon Magazine Issue 247: May 1998


part 2/8


Forum is well and truly in it's new more focussed, change directed swing now, with a new header and the question of the month at the beginning rather than the end. This time, it's psionics that are the big issue. Should they stay or should they go now? If they stay there will be trouble. But if they go it will be double. So you've gotta let us know!

Gary Sturgess thinks Alteration needs some serious pruning for the next edition. It's got so many spells that belong elsewhere really, simply because the writers were lazy. As a result, it's rather overpowered and thematically blurred at the moment. Absolutely correct.

Lloyd Brown III thinks intelligence ought to be decoupled from your ability to learn skills. Hmmmmm. Hmmmmm. Hmmmm. No.

Kenneth Rath isn't talking about 3rd ed, with a load of discussion about the ballistics of missile weapons combined with flight. It does take a bit of trigonometry to accurately model. May be a bit complicated for many gamers.

Paul Benfield wants the XP and psionics systems fixed, but the magic one mostly left alone. The classes need more even advancement. Yup. You can have that one.

Paul Hoyak doesn't think D&D needs a new edition, it's good enough as it is. I knew there would be one. He's particularly not keen on making all the old books obsolete. Sorry man, there's just too much built up crap. We need to make sacrifices.

Bill Logan has many suggestions, including the idea for the new saving throw system. But plenty more that weren't taken up. Once again, we now know who's idea another little piece of the big picture was.

Bill Johnson points out just how much magic there IS in Tolkien. Yes, but they don't rub it in your face. Gandalf uses his brain more than his fireball blasting. And remember, the classes are based on them, not the other way round.


Sage advice finally finds the time and money to get rid of the nasty spiky decor from the dark times too. Good to see the end of it. Guess Skip's finally got his groove back. And a new love of italics as well. The private sage aint shuttin his mouth anymore. Bow chicka wow wow and all that.

How long does it take to banish an elemental (The same time it took to summon it. You'd better have something to keep yourself from getting hit in the meantime, cause excorcist is not a safe job. )

Can you stack invisible mail with other non AC increasing defensive buffs (if it makes sense)

Just what can you do when only partially broken out of a web (Again, common sense. Note that webs are springy and tend to go back to being an obstruction even if one person breaks out)

Pain touch makes no sense as a divination. (No. It's necromancy. Buy a new updated copy of the book where we've already fixed this problem :teeth ting

What happens if you cast transmute bone to steel on a dead person before bringing them back to life (Skip recommends against allowing benefits from it. Screw the rules lawyers, gotta screw those rules lawyers. Skip don't want any competition round these parts )

Can a ring of spell turning deflect a cursed scroll. (no. You brought it on yourself by reading it, so there's no-one for it to be reflected back on)

Does charm person or mammal have a save (yes. Read the spell better, dummy)

Who saves against random causality (the person holding the item affected)

Can chill touch repel ravenloft undead (yes)

Do you have to touch stone to stone shape it. (yes. You want a larger area, you'll need to cast move earth instead)

Shouldn't fireball deal pressure damage to fire resistant creatures (What pressure. It's magic, ooooh. Logical extrapolations don't work)

Can an ottilukes telekinetic sphere be used to fly (sure. Won't be a comfortable ride though, particularly if lots of things are inside being jostled around. )

Can protection from normal missiles work against point blank shots (yes. So much for holding a gun to someone's head. Not that that ever worked under the rules anyway. Damn escalating hit points)

Can rope trick be used to bypass a wall of force (only if it's a moving wall. Rope tricks can't move their entry point. )

How do you decide if an exploit is a legitimate piece of cleverness or a horrible bit of twinking that needs to be stamped upon. (Rule zero, biatch. Skip cannot substitute for common sense. You've gotta decide what's good for your game, and what's bad. Don't listen to those pesky players, you can't trust them an inch. They only want to beat you.)

 

[Orius]

Alternity gets a pack with a GM screen, character sheets, and a bunch of other loose leaf gubbins. Shoulda got a boxed set, then we wouldn't have to buy this separately.

Weren't the boxed sets costing TSR a lot of money though?

And they were kind of following the D&D model here anyway I guess, since the game always sold those sperately.

 

[(un)reason]

Dragon Magazine Issue 247: May 1998


part 3/8


What the hell is a Baatezu? Well, the writing is certainly on the wall for those unpronounceable second edition fiend names. Soon they'll be back to being demonized and treated simply as boring big bads to kill.


Out of character: Peter delivers another solid but unexceptional bit of writing this month. Why did your character become an adventurer? Was he born to it, did he choose it, or was it thrust upon him unexpectedly. The most interesting ones are rarely the emotionless connectionless hyperoptimised monsters. Yeah, this is a familiar one, and all the literary examples given are very familiar ones as well. Definitely an article for the less experienced player, reminding us of the kind of things they do every few years. Meh. Let's move on.


Rakasta of mystara: Oh joy. As he did with lupins last year, Bruce Heard now provides a whole load of subbreeds of rakasta with different ability modifiers and class capabilities. Which means you can have whole teams of cat-men vs dog-men, and still have well differentiated parties. This is useful. As with the previous one, it wouldn't be hard to file off the cultural fluff and transplant them to other worlds. There aren't quite as many subbreeds here as the lupins got, but that's due to the nature of the source material. Instead, most of the variants are clearly derived from one breed of great cat or another. Of course, there are plenty of other cat-humanoid hybrids out there, and this makes for complicated relationships which aren't glossed over here. Suffice to say they aren't very fond of rakshasa, and will get rid of them terminally if they find out one is among them. Just as with lupins, the breeds get special abilities (including the obvious 9 lives one for domestic rakasta) that actually make them a good deal more varied than a standard race party, while also retaining a common set of strengths and weaknesses. (if anyone's going to be shooting for a 15 minute work day, it's a party containing one of these guys) So this is another article that could pretty much take over your game, given the popularity of cats and the amount of cool crunch contained within. Ed may win in terms of sheer quantity of writing, but Bruce manages a density of useful information that far exceeds his page count. I hope he still has a few more contributions to make to the magazine before the end.


The Taltos: Well well, Tom Moldvay's back. Ok, he wasn't gone as long as some of the old guard, but still, we haven't seen him since 1994, when he finished his series revamping the various varieties of undead. And here we see he's a fan of Steven Brust as well, giving a new class which is practically designed to replicate Vlad Taltos. Well, as a real jack of all trades with some distinctive elements, he's impossible to do in AD&D without cheating, as we saw in issue 220. So he gets to join Drizzt as a character so cool that he gets new rules so you can copy him. Even more interestingly, we get a full 7 kits for this new class, instantly giving you a whole bunch of different variants on the general principle of spirit-fighting jack of all trades, and removing my usual problem with introducing new classes at this point. I'm not sure how balanced they are, as their abilities are versatile in some ways, but limited in others compared to regular classes, but they are pretty intriguing and certainly worth investigating further. I wonder if the frequency of new classes is another thing that'll increase now they've got rid of the old TSR rules.


Heroes of cerilia: It's birthright's turn to get a load of Players Option support for their various classes and races, making them more distinctive, but also more twinkable. Elves get even better in in woodlands, halflings get to kick the ass of undead, dwarves can move silently underground, and humans get 5 different racial subtypes, each with their own buyable abilities. It is what it is, and you know by now I'm not interested, so I think this is a case where I shall skip lightly through this article and move on.

 

[(un)reason]

Dragon Magazine Issue 247: May 1998


part 4/8


Wyrms of the north gets a new, more legible header style. And once again Ed provides another exceptional dragon, making it seem like they're more common than the ones who keep to all the rules. A dragon afflicted by a magical binding that forces her to defend Candlekeep against any thieves or invaders, even beyond death, and stuck with that job even though her body's long since rotted away? Yeah, that's going to be an almighty pain in the butt for adventurers to deal with, especially as she respawns, and no-one knows how to stop this. And no surprise that she's also intimately familiar with the place she's trapped, and of dubious sanity from the centuries of loneliness. A horror story almost worthy of Ravenloft, really, only without the ironic justice. In terms of writing quality, this is pretty much business as usual, with Ed's more irritating quirks very much in evidence. Give us something lower level characters can engage with please. Otherwise the Realms may become increasingly unfriendly to new players.


Fiction: Reunification by Jeff Grubb. Another bit of Forgotten Realms fiction this month, using previously established characters. And in this case obviously following on from and referencing previous adventures, although not to the point of impenetrability. And as with Troy Denning's work a couple of issues ago, it showcases the interesting relationships the gods there have with their followers. Since atheism is not a very sensible choice if you're at all concerned about the hereafter, you may have to pick a god who seems like the least worst choice. Meanwhile the gods have their own issues with noninterference and plausible deniability. What they say they want may not actually be what they want. So again, as with Troy's work, this shows there's more moral complexity to the Realms than there may seem, despite them having objective morality. And it is gradually becoming less generic as time goes on, as ideas are introduced that build off the previous ones rather than having real world sources. There are some benefits to relying on staff writers who have built up a relationship with each other over years and developed their own distinctive office culture.


Bookwyrms: Between the rivers by Harry Turtledove does his usual historical setting with a spin thing, in a Bronze age society with gods who are active, and often vindictive. Of course, the protagonist holds to slightly more modern values, and the conflict between reason and obedience is a primary driver of the plot. This also serves as a metaphor for being a mindless drone or a free-thinker in modern society. And I don't think it'll surprise you which side the author is on. Where ARE the books encouraging you to be mindless drones?

Ship of magic by Robin Hobb is very much a fantasy slice of life, with heroes that are flawed, and villains that have explainable motivations, and their plotlines intertwining in an interesting manner. The main complaint is that it's clearly written to the word count, and then cut off to make a new volume when it gets there regardless of the state the plot is in. Given how thick these books are, that's obviously driven by marketing wanting to make sure she covers tons of shelf space at your local bookstore. After all, thats a big part of getting those megasales these days.

Touched by the gods by Lawrence Watt-Evans is another story where there's lots of active gods, or at least used to be. While a recommendation, this is another one where the weaknesses of the book are given plenty of attention, to the point where it feels like a proper review again. Are they listening to the reader's complaints? Well, it wouldn't be the first time.

 

[(un)reason]

Dragon Magazine Issue 247: May 1998


part 5/8


Rogues Gallery once again follows up on the fiction earlier in the issue. Kate Novak details the characters that she and her group played, and her hubby DM'd for. What are we to make of that? Well, it's probably not scraping the barrel, but it does have the danger of getting cheesy and self-indulgent. Still, they obviously had a lot of fun, and that comes through in the writing, which goes quite some way towards mitigating my scepticism.

Dwalimar Omen is the wizard of the group, and is older (well, relatively, given the presence of demihumans) and higher level than the rest of them. As with many old wizards, he can be subtle and quick to anger, but he's not so powerful that he can just blow off his companions, and it's pretty obvious that he does have some affection for them. He also has quite a distinctive appearance that the illustration captures decently. So far, they're no doing too badly.

Minder is a dwarf who's been stuck in a Golem body. Since Alias was also a woman who was actually a construct, this makes me wonder about Jeff & Kate's personal fetishes. She does have a bit of angst about not being able to smell or taste anymore, but hey, immortality and immunity to nonmagical attacks make up for that. There are far worse fates.

Foxilon Cardluck is our halfling thief, complete with drug issues (which have been bowdlerised in amusing fashion. ) He's managed to kick the habit, but still gets tempted from time to time. He also shaves his foot hair, which does seem a little weird. I guess they've got to buck the stereotypes in more ways than one.

Ishi Barasume looks like a 1st edition OA holdover, with Bushi and Monk abilities in a way that doesn't look strictly legal to me. But then, she's sharing a party with a Golem, and what are the rules for that? She has the usual Oriental obsession with honor, and a disgrace which gives her a good reason to be away from her homeland and questing for a way to redeem herself. And as long as they have more adventures to tell, that plot hook is unlikely to be resolved.

Vartan Hai Sylvar is the elf, but he's also the cleric, which does buck stereotype a little. He's pretty twinked, and got to be the avatar of his god during the Time of Troubles. (which did strain their relationship a little. ) He could be a mary-sue, but has enough character flaws and genuine struggles to avert that. This collection of characters is actually proving pretty good.

Priam Agrivar is the paladin, and is another member of the party with addiction issues, having fallen into drink after a pretty spectacular failure. This means he has more sympathy than many paladins for people who can't manage the same kind of moral standards as him. He's also not celibate, having got into a relationship with Ishi. He could actually be decent company. So overall, I do approve of this collection, as they've obviously been built up organically and well treated over the years, rather than just whipped up for a single novel then forgotten about.


Bazaar of the Bizarre gets to be green under the new format. It does look a good deal better. As with last issue, we're getting a load of stuff that's likely to be useful in a more everyday environment. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Aprons of the alchemist protect you from explosive experiments. Common sense really. A good one for wizards, as they give an AC bonus, but don't exactly count as armour. Way to get round your normal restrictions.

Nalkar's Apron is an absolute lifesaver, albeit one that requires rather expensive maintennance. Like most charged magical items, this'll be a real problem until very high level.

Tools of Art are another basic skill booster. Of course, they're cheaper than weapons with the same plus, despite probably being rarer. Supply and demand is of course dependent on the demand bit.

Magic Tar reduces your ship maintenance by several orders of magnitude. Well, it should sell for a good amount to the right people. Boat building is so expensive that an extra 500gp isn't too hard to spring for.

Flags of the Warsmith make fixing stuff much quicker and easier. Which is something we've had before, but is still useful. It does have some awkward stipulations though. May well be another one it's better to sell on.

Nalkor's tape measure lets you automate your tailoring processes. Trade the personal touch for being groped by an invisible force. Yeah, that'll make you popular with the customers.

Glasses of the Architect don't seem to do much, unless there's some architecture specific terminology I'm missing here. Can someone explain this one to me?

Barrels of Potion Storing let you deal with the problem of having dozens of bottles in your backpack and having a devil of a time finding the right one. Like any mass storage device, this is tremendously handy if you track encumbrance.

Jadon's mortar dries really fast. Now those builders have one less excuse for hanging around drinking tea with their arses hanging out. It may even be useful for remodelling dungeons as you go. Now that has even more tactical tricks than flaming oil.

Knives of Decoration let you carve stuff quickly and easily. It only works on wood though, so no swashbuckling in combat pisstaking, unless you're fighting treants. And I don't think you'll want to carry one around just in case of that eventuality. This isn't as fun as last month's collection.

Nalkor's Book of Servants generates lots of unseen servants. If you're sparing with it, it'll last for a lifetime. If not, you'll wear it out. Manage your resources folks. Long term planning is nearly always the better option.

Fitting Dolls assume the shape of a person, to help you in creating bespoke garments. Maybe you could also use them as a decoy, but I can't think of any real combat use for them.

Easels of Pageturning are yet another way wizards can freak the mundanes and make their lives more convenient. It's like having a remote control for your books. Now all you need is a speaker function too, since shortsightedness can be a real pain for wizards.

Changing Molds let you produce lots of different weapons without paying for different molds. Which will probably cost more than buying all the molds, given how expensive magic items are. A bit pointless really. Well, at least it saves on storage space.

Molds of 1000 Candles are not nearly as impressive as their name. Bah. You'll need quite a bit of patience to get that much out of them.

Pots of Metal Melting do what they say on the tin. Simple and easy. But probably a bit tricky to use in combat.

Diamond Scales let you instantly value any gems you find. That'll help settle arguments and save money on valuers. Keep it in house as much as possible to profit.

Diamond Scales of Chalacha put the power in the hands of the merchant, allowing you to over or undervalue commissions as you choose. Muahahaha.

Dan's Dough Doubler does exactly that. Another boring logistics multiplier to make your provisioning a little easier. This really is getting a bit tiresome.

Jeremiah's box of Knife Sharpening makes me lose the will to live. Really. The personal touches, they do nothing.

Vials of Nalkor let you identify potions. Again, very handy to have one of these along for the ride, instead of risking poisoning or 8 tedious hours casting identify.

 

[David Howery]

Between the rivers by Harry Turtledove

hmm... I just started reading this recently, picked it up in a used bookstore...

 

[(un)reason]

Dragon Magazine Issue 247: May 1998


part 6/8


Dragon's bestiary: A new header here as well, as their revamps sweep through the whole magazine. But not a new topic, as we've had quite a few frogs in the magazine's run, including a couple quite recently in issue 237. Come on, couldn't you wait a little longer before you rehashed this one.

Archer frogs, like archer fish, knock you down and suck you up. Nature does tend to reuse the same tricks over and over if they work, doesn't it.

Ghoul frogs, like ghoul worms, aren't actually undead, merely translucent. Again, just make it a template. They aren't particularly offensive and the don't make good eatin', so just leave them as a flavour encounter.

Leech toads suck your bluuuud. Like stirges, one probably won't kill you, but they come in large groups to suck you dry.

Spined toads are also pretty self-explanatory, adding the defences of hedgehogs to their usual amphibious tricks. Seems like all these ones have been made by combining one existing creature with another basic monster idea. This makes this entry feel very formulaic and tedious indeed. Someone is churning out crap primarily for the pay rather than inspiration. Seems rather worrying that the average quality of new monsters is decreasing as the rate they give them to us increases. Guess it's another sign we rather need a new edition.


Dungeon Mastery: Along with the skill system in general, languages can be a real pain in the butt in AD&D. And given the modularity of proficiency slots, if you do buy one after character creation, you can seem to go from nothing to full fluency straight away when that isn't the case with real learning at all. The solution here is to go with a BRP style percentile rating in languages that you can increase slowly on a month by month basis. Which is a moderate amount of bookkeeping, but far less annoying than many of the alternatives, and only really becomes a problem if you're trying to learn a ton of different dialects in short succession. Which if you're adventuring over wide areas might become an issue, but it's supposed to be challenging, isn't it. While this introduces unconnected new crunch, it's a better than average example of it's type, and feels curiously old school in it's approach. With the new class, the openly devilish new advertising, and this, it looks like they are actually going back to their roots in several interesting ways. I wonder how long it'll take them to formally adopt the back to the dungeon slogan that they use next edition.


Dragonmirth has a star trek crossover. There is no escape. Swordplay tries their hand at medicine. This isn't going to work.