D&D 5E Limericks of the Savage Frontier

[tardigrade]

My players are currently in the middle of a festival in Triboar. In the next session I will be running a 'bard-off'; round 1 will be recitals, round 2 will be a dance off and round 3 will be a limerick competition. Unfortunately, I've been a bit under the weather and have had less time than I wanted to come up with some limericks for the NPCs - does anyone have any they'd be willing to share?

 

[aco175]

There was once a thief
Who hailed from Waterdeep
He died while stealing a sword
From a most terrible lord
For the price paid was too steep.

Two dwarves made an ale
From the tip of a dragon's tail
They said with a smile
"This tastes a bit vile"
Next time we will use the snail.

Eh

 

[Eltab]

There once was a lad from Nantucket
Who caught all his fish in a bucket
He turned himself round
For lo he had found
His oven burnt out which did suck-et.

Put this in the mouth of a cheerful drunk.

 

[rgoodbb]

There once was a Tabaxi on a roof
T’was a Sorcerer but wanted more proof
Casting Fireball on Self
Instead of Acid at Melf
We then saw a cat that went woof!

 

[rgoodbb]

Portent and then Lucky with Luck
The Halfling that never lost a Ruck
She took on a genie
That wished her more teeny
At that point she stated “oh F…..iddlesticks

 

[rgoodbb]

If it is a bard off song.....

Anything song you can sing I can sing better.
I can sing any song better than you.

Any ale you can drink I can drink faster,
I can drink any ale faster than you.

Any sword you can swing, I can swing better,
I can swing any sword better than you.

Any orc you can kill, I can kill swifter,
I can kill any orc swifter than you.

Every time we perform, I do it better,
I perform every time better than you.