The writer she referred to, Samuel Delany, has responded on Facebook. If the forum moderators have an issue with the language feel free to edit or delete it.
""Colored ladies," was what my aunts Bessie and Sadie referred to themselves as, and I favored "black"(with a small B, because because of my experiences in '68, with the activists who changed the country from "Negro" to Dr. Du Bois's preferred term). Among colored or black or Negro folks he had no problem—since scientifically there is no such thing as race, the terms are all social constructs. With all due respect for anyone over 60, there are no "bad words;" it depends alone on the vernacular you were brought up with. (Prescriptive usage and grammar starts out as a lost cause.) I would like to see institutions leave their hands off the spoken language of their elders. At 8 years my junior, and a native of a city I am very fond of, Mercedes Lackey has my permission to speak of me in any way she chooses. "Person of color" is just awkward (so I wouldn't use it myself); my paternal grandfather was born a slave, and there were white mongrels and Native Americans scattered throughout; "colored" has no negative connotations among any speakers black or white in my family and never had.”"