"I ain't feeling the love!" or why do 'epic' players make strict GMs?

Voneth · May 23, 2003

I have felt betrayed lately.

I have two players that insist on playing the most expansive characters they can. They not only want to be the movers and shakers, they also always ask for special favors. Sometimes it's for some hook up in the game world or for a special power, or for a "interperative" ruling on their abilites.

I ususaly give it to them because I can usualy roll with it and balance everything out, though sometimes they ask why I let other players get "special treatement."

Recently, both players offered to run some games and invited me to join.

In both games, these players turned out to be the most restrictive GMs I have ever played with. They even "powered down" the character construction rules that were in the book, making the PCs in their games weaker than the average starting PC. And did any of my special requests get honored? Only one GM alllowed me to have a couple of things, but only after having a long discussion with him. This same person usualy gets what he asks for from me with just a question or two.

So is this a trend anyone else notices? And what motivates a "special" player to overcompensate by being a super strict GM?

BiggusGeekus · May 23, 2003

In my experience the two DMs I've known who had to have "special" characters, one had a "special" NPC who played along side the party (we weren't exactly sidekicks, but it was close). The other guy had everyone be "special" and overpowered which led to pretty boring combats as we killed everything in a round or two.

... but everyone's different I guess.

FireLance · May 23, 2003

I'm not a psychologist, but it could be control freak behaviour. As players, they want plenty of abilities so that they can "control" events in the DM's game universe. As DMs, they are stingy with abilities so that they can "control" the player's characters.

Nifft · May 23, 2003

Cynical Answer: Maybe they're strict because they saw what being loose gets a DM -- no respect!

Psychological Answer: Maybe they're control freaks. They want special favors in your campaign because they want to know that they've got control of you. When you play in their campaigns, they STILL want control.

Mean Answer: You are weak and they are using you like a doormat.

Nice Answer: They're just trying something different -- all campaigns shouldn't have the same "flavor".

Non-Voneth-o-centric Answer: Maybe their other players are lame, and they can't handle having their other players get the special treatment which you & your group are mature enough to handle.

-- Nifft

Umbran · May 23, 2003

Or, maybe there's a difference between having power in one game and handing it out in another? Maybe they simply don't feel secure giving out the same sorts of bennies that you had out easily, because they are perhaps a bit new at the whole DMing thing? There's a difference between being a "control freak" and not having quite so solid a handle on balance, folks.

Voneth · May 23, 2003

Call me self centered, but I choose all but the Non-Voneth answers.

I noticed that my spoiled players have gotten grumply lately since I don't do them any more favors and they now constantly come to me for another, different request to see if I can change my mind.

The player that did give me a few bits of my requests has said I need to say "no" more often.

The funny thing is that when I told him "no," he said, "That doesn't mean I have to just accept it at face value." At the end of our discussion, it was still "no."

I learned my lesson. Just because people enjoy playing in my fast and loose games, doesn't beholden them to return the favor.

*Sigh*

Now where am I going to find a DM who can treat me like I treat them.

maddman75 · May 23, 2003

Its my theory that all DMs want to play in their own campaign. I know that's true of me, and there isn't any big deep psycological reason why.

- DM's try to make the game the most fun for his group as possible.
- Everyone has a slightly different idea of what fun is.
- A DM would like to play in a world that he considers the 'most fun'.

Don't take it personally. I just try to see what the DM sees for the game. Maybe there's a brand of fun I hadn't considered that I should explore.