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2018 IRON DM Tournament
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<blockquote data-quote="Rune" data-source="post: 7509087" data-attributes="member: 67"><p><strong>Judgement for Round 2, Match 1: MortalPlague vs. hawkeyefan</strong></p><p></p><p>Let me begin by saying that the parameters in IRON DM are each intended to challenge the contestants in different, often synergistic ways. No single parameter is less important than another. A competitor may be tempted to squeeze in a few (or, let’s say, forty) extra words and gamble that the strength of the writing and ingredient-weaving will carry them through. The reason that is a gamble is that the end of the entry isn’t going to counted. Or read at all, at least in this judge’s case. </p><p></p><p>hawkeyefan’s “Catalyst” crosses the line. Different word-counters have indicated varied results for me, but the most generous pegs it at 38 words over the limit. I wasn’t happy to see that, but, oh well. I chopped off the end and started reading. </p><p></p><p>Then MortalPlague posted “Morality Index.” I copied it over to my word-processing app (minus title and ingredients). 1506. Uh oh. Copied into a different app. 1506. That didn’t seem likely. MortalPlague had turned the piece in with time to spare and had already talked about trading words to hit the word-limit. 1506 would be a pretty ridiculous oversight. </p><p></p><p>So I conferred with the other judges. Iron Sky pegged it at 1497. I alternated between reads of the entries, note-taking of same, and trying to figure out the source of the discrepancy. Eventually, I had to conclude that this particular mystery would have to go unanswered. I just don’t have the time for it. </p><p></p><p>Then Deuce chimed in, reminding me of the existence of <a href="https://wordcounter.net" target="_blank">WordCounter.net</a>, which gave him the count of 1499. I tried it and...1493. Good enough. I’ll be using that site from now on, so contestants might do well to check it themselves. </p><p></p><p>Oh, and by the way, that most generous +38 word count for “Catalyst” also came from the site. So that’s that. </p><p></p><p><strong>Back to business:</strong></p><p></p><p>Both adventures are pretty strong and fairly well-presented (at least, up to 1500 words). “Catalyst” gives a tight investigative horror scenario that does justice to the genre. The scenes are arranged in a loosely non-linear cluster with plenty of minor picture-building clues. Sprinkled within are a handful of big clues that are very likely to steer the PCs toward the next important location (assuming they actually get those clues). </p><p></p><p>The effect of this is to create a scenario that is likely to broadly follow a particular path, without getting hung up on the limitations that actual linear design bring along with it, assuming the GM is skilled enough to avoid it. This is good design, particularly for an investigative scenario, although some GMing advice would go a long way toward making it actually play out as well as it has the potential to do. </p><p></p><p>Along the way, there’s really a lot to uncover. There’s not a lot of actual action in the course of things (until the climax), but that’s perfectly within genre expectations. The attention spent on detailing possible repercussions of the PCs’ choices is well-implemented and much appreciated. Of course, I don’t know what happens if the PCs flat-out fail, as I had to chop off the last 38 words because: rules. But I think this can be pretty well inferred based on the plentiful clues throughout the adventure. </p><p></p><p>At first read, this is a good adventure. After multiple reads, it looks even better. I’m impressed. True, the language is sometimes pretty clunky, which works to obfuscate the underlying goodness. Cleaning it up a bit would likely have shortened it to be within the word-limit, too. But, looking past that, yeah. I’m impressed. There’s a lot to be impressed by. </p><p></p><p>As it happens, “Morality” also presents a very solid adventure with a strong investigative element, as well as a <em>very</em> intense cat-and-mouse scenario complicated by the potential for those roles to flip (possibly more than once!). To top it off, the adventure adds depth with a level of moral dilemma. And right in the middle of <em>that</em>, there’s a wild-card in the form of an enigmatic and possibly problematic out-of-place NPC. </p><p></p><p>This adventure seems simple because it is tightly presented and has a clear set of goals presented at the outset. It is deceptively complex. Throughout, the PCs are likely to be questioning their mission, figuring out what the situation really is, figuring out how they want to deal with it, figuring out how they <em>can</em> deal with it, and, if they survive all that, hoping they’ve figured out if they even want to complete the mission. Ideally (from a GM-point of view), the PCs won’t agree on that last point. </p><p></p><p>This is not a good adventure scenario. It is a superb one. </p><p></p><p><strong>But the ingredients...</strong></p><p></p><p>The <strong>High Toll</strong> of “Catalyst” is not explicitly pointed out, but is used as a theme to illustrate the mounting consequences of the madness. As such, the ingredient is omnipresent and inherently tied to all of the others. This is a very good usage of the ingredient. The fact that it is also a direct threat to the PCs makes that much better. </p><p></p><p>“Mortality” uses a more direct approach. The <strong>High Toll</strong> is the method the PCs carry with them throughout the adventure to deactivate the Medusa-bot. It is, thus, extremely relevant to the PCs. That’s good. Unfortunately, it really didn’t need to take that form. For instance, wouldn’t something like a portable EMP work better? </p><p></p><p>Both entries make similar use of the <strong>Time Bomb</strong> ingredient. The bomb in “Catalyst” seems at first a minor clue, but the ability for the PCs to make use of it themselves enhances its relevance a bit. This is lessened by the somewhat unlikeliness it actually will be used in such a way. On the other hand, there is a not-insignificant chance that at least one of the PCs will go insane and having a time bomb available just makes that better. </p><p></p><p>“Morality” ties the ingredient (in the form of the ship’s self destruct sequence) in nicely to the ultimate moral dilemma – as long as the Medusa doesn’t trigger it earlier. If she does, of course, that sets up yet another (possibly overlapping) exciting sequence. Of the two, this use seems superior. </p><p></p><p>The <strong>Affluent Panhandler</strong> of both entries is problematic as an ingredient. In both, the affluence of the panhandler is minimally relevant at best. Worse, neither actually panhandle! Binjun comes closest, but his demands for money are more of a (perhaps unreasonable) attempt at debt-collection. The panhandlers’ roles are important and the characters are good (especially Binjun), but the ingredient-usage simply isn’t. </p><p></p><p>I’m pretty sure that “Catalyst” intends for the Dread Virago to be the <strong>Phobic Medusa</strong>, although they are never actually called that. The phobic part is quite clever; the creatures spread an irrational and overpowering fear. The problem is, even with the name, “virago,” giving them a connotation of violent female traits (and what does that even mean in this context?), the leap from there to medusa is very long. Too long for me to make, at any rate. And, in case the idea of being “petrified from fear” was supposed to come up, I will point out that no subjects of the fear-effect are ever described as being frozen with fright. Indeed, they all very specifically remain mobile. </p><p></p><p>In contrast, the <strong>Phobic Medusa</strong> in “Morality” really does provide a genre-appropriate (and really creepy) petrification effect. Added to that, having the Medusa-bot’s poorly-calibrated threat assessment algorithm trigger her defensive (offensive) protocols is a bit of pure briliance. This, alone, would make for a very well done ingredient. The fact that the Medusa’s role is so integral to the adventure elevates it further. </p><p></p><p>Regrettably, “Mortality” offers nothing particularly memorable – or even identifiable, really – in the way of an <strong>Indignant Retort</strong>. “Catalyst” at least gives us King’s last communication, but its only function is as background color. </p><p></p><p>I am a little confused about just what the <strong>Dirty Secret</strong> in “Catalyst” is. Presumably, it is the Dread Virago in King’s dirty apartment, but the Dread Virago itself is smelly, not dirty. And the importance of the apartment’s dirtiness, while not entirely absent, is fairly subdued.</p><p></p><p>On the other hand, “Morality” hangs its <strong>Dirty Secret</strong> (DelphiCorp’s insertion and activation of the Medusa on the <em>Seriphus</em>) over the entire adventure – ever-present and impossible to ignore. </p><p></p><p>Finally, there’s the <strong>Pure Sample</strong>. In “Morality,” it comes in the form of Medusa’s code. As such, it is basically just a Macguffin, though its tie-in to the moral predicament helps redeem it. </p><p></p><p>Meanwhile, Sayer’s Dread Virago in “Catalyst” also seems a weak use of the ingredient at first, but the possibility that the sample might actually be able to be used to make an effective cure strengthens its importance to the adventure manyfold.</p><p></p><p><strong>Reckoning:</strong></p><p></p><p>So that’s an even split of 3 to 3, with one ingredient being used equally poorly in both entries. </p><p></p><p>Which brings us back to the qualities of the adventures, themselves. hawkeyefan did well in that regard, but MortalPlague did even better. </p><p></p><p>What can I say? [MENTION=6785785]hawkeyefan[/MENTION], you’ve got good vision (in the long run, that’ll be your greatest strength, I think) and you came <em>very<em> close to knocking off a former IRON DM in this round. A little more regard for the parameters of the competition and a little more polish – even just one ingredient integrated a little better – and I think at least two of these judgements might have tilted your way. </em></em></p><p><em><em></em></em></p><p><em><em>This time, though, [MENTION=62721]MortalPlague[/MENTION] shows how an IRON DM gets it done and advances, by unanimous decision, to the Championship Round.</em></em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Rune, post: 7509087, member: 67"] [b]Judgement for Round 2, Match 1: MortalPlague vs. hawkeyefan[/b] Let me begin by saying that the parameters in IRON DM are each intended to challenge the contestants in different, often synergistic ways. No single parameter is less important than another. A competitor may be tempted to squeeze in a few (or, let’s say, forty) extra words and gamble that the strength of the writing and ingredient-weaving will carry them through. The reason that is a gamble is that the end of the entry isn’t going to counted. Or read at all, at least in this judge’s case. hawkeyefan’s “Catalyst” crosses the line. Different word-counters have indicated varied results for me, but the most generous pegs it at 38 words over the limit. I wasn’t happy to see that, but, oh well. I chopped off the end and started reading. Then MortalPlague posted “Morality Index.” I copied it over to my word-processing app (minus title and ingredients). 1506. Uh oh. Copied into a different app. 1506. That didn’t seem likely. MortalPlague had turned the piece in with time to spare and had already talked about trading words to hit the word-limit. 1506 would be a pretty ridiculous oversight. So I conferred with the other judges. Iron Sky pegged it at 1497. I alternated between reads of the entries, note-taking of same, and trying to figure out the source of the discrepancy. Eventually, I had to conclude that this particular mystery would have to go unanswered. I just don’t have the time for it. Then Deuce chimed in, reminding me of the existence of [url=https://wordcounter.net]WordCounter.net[/url], which gave him the count of 1499. I tried it and...1493. Good enough. I’ll be using that site from now on, so contestants might do well to check it themselves. Oh, and by the way, that most generous +38 word count for “Catalyst” also came from the site. So that’s that. [b]Back to business:[/b] Both adventures are pretty strong and fairly well-presented (at least, up to 1500 words). “Catalyst” gives a tight investigative horror scenario that does justice to the genre. The scenes are arranged in a loosely non-linear cluster with plenty of minor picture-building clues. Sprinkled within are a handful of big clues that are very likely to steer the PCs toward the next important location (assuming they actually get those clues). The effect of this is to create a scenario that is likely to broadly follow a particular path, without getting hung up on the limitations that actual linear design bring along with it, assuming the GM is skilled enough to avoid it. This is good design, particularly for an investigative scenario, although some GMing advice would go a long way toward making it actually play out as well as it has the potential to do. Along the way, there’s really a lot to uncover. There’s not a lot of actual action in the course of things (until the climax), but that’s perfectly within genre expectations. The attention spent on detailing possible repercussions of the PCs’ choices is well-implemented and much appreciated. Of course, I don’t know what happens if the PCs flat-out fail, as I had to chop off the last 38 words because: rules. But I think this can be pretty well inferred based on the plentiful clues throughout the adventure. At first read, this is a good adventure. After multiple reads, it looks even better. I’m impressed. True, the language is sometimes pretty clunky, which works to obfuscate the underlying goodness. Cleaning it up a bit would likely have shortened it to be within the word-limit, too. But, looking past that, yeah. I’m impressed. There’s a lot to be impressed by. As it happens, “Morality” also presents a very solid adventure with a strong investigative element, as well as a [i]very[/i] intense cat-and-mouse scenario complicated by the potential for those roles to flip (possibly more than once!). To top it off, the adventure adds depth with a level of moral dilemma. And right in the middle of [i]that[/i], there’s a wild-card in the form of an enigmatic and possibly problematic out-of-place NPC. This adventure seems simple because it is tightly presented and has a clear set of goals presented at the outset. It is deceptively complex. Throughout, the PCs are likely to be questioning their mission, figuring out what the situation really is, figuring out how they want to deal with it, figuring out how they [i]can[/i] deal with it, and, if they survive all that, hoping they’ve figured out if they even want to complete the mission. Ideally (from a GM-point of view), the PCs won’t agree on that last point. This is not a good adventure scenario. It is a superb one. [b]But the ingredients...[/b] The [b]High Toll[/b] of “Catalyst” is not explicitly pointed out, but is used as a theme to illustrate the mounting consequences of the madness. As such, the ingredient is omnipresent and inherently tied to all of the others. This is a very good usage of the ingredient. The fact that it is also a direct threat to the PCs makes that much better. “Mortality” uses a more direct approach. The [b]High Toll[/b] is the method the PCs carry with them throughout the adventure to deactivate the Medusa-bot. It is, thus, extremely relevant to the PCs. That’s good. Unfortunately, it really didn’t need to take that form. For instance, wouldn’t something like a portable EMP work better? Both entries make similar use of the [b]Time Bomb[/b] ingredient. The bomb in “Catalyst” seems at first a minor clue, but the ability for the PCs to make use of it themselves enhances its relevance a bit. This is lessened by the somewhat unlikeliness it actually will be used in such a way. On the other hand, there is a not-insignificant chance that at least one of the PCs will go insane and having a time bomb available just makes that better. “Morality” ties the ingredient (in the form of the ship’s self destruct sequence) in nicely to the ultimate moral dilemma – as long as the Medusa doesn’t trigger it earlier. If she does, of course, that sets up yet another (possibly overlapping) exciting sequence. Of the two, this use seems superior. The [b]Affluent Panhandler[/b] of both entries is problematic as an ingredient. In both, the affluence of the panhandler is minimally relevant at best. Worse, neither actually panhandle! Binjun comes closest, but his demands for money are more of a (perhaps unreasonable) attempt at debt-collection. The panhandlers’ roles are important and the characters are good (especially Binjun), but the ingredient-usage simply isn’t. I’m pretty sure that “Catalyst” intends for the Dread Virago to be the [b]Phobic Medusa[/b], although they are never actually called that. The phobic part is quite clever; the creatures spread an irrational and overpowering fear. The problem is, even with the name, “virago,” giving them a connotation of violent female traits (and what does that even mean in this context?), the leap from there to medusa is very long. Too long for me to make, at any rate. And, in case the idea of being “petrified from fear” was supposed to come up, I will point out that no subjects of the fear-effect are ever described as being frozen with fright. Indeed, they all very specifically remain mobile. In contrast, the [b]Phobic Medusa[/b] in “Morality” really does provide a genre-appropriate (and really creepy) petrification effect. Added to that, having the Medusa-bot’s poorly-calibrated threat assessment algorithm trigger her defensive (offensive) protocols is a bit of pure briliance. This, alone, would make for a very well done ingredient. The fact that the Medusa’s role is so integral to the adventure elevates it further. Regrettably, “Mortality” offers nothing particularly memorable – or even identifiable, really – in the way of an [b]Indignant Retort[/b]. “Catalyst” at least gives us King’s last communication, but its only function is as background color. I am a little confused about just what the [b]Dirty Secret[/b] in “Catalyst” is. Presumably, it is the Dread Virago in King’s dirty apartment, but the Dread Virago itself is smelly, not dirty. And the importance of the apartment’s dirtiness, while not entirely absent, is fairly subdued. On the other hand, “Morality” hangs its [b]Dirty Secret[/b] (DelphiCorp’s insertion and activation of the Medusa on the [i]Seriphus[/i]) over the entire adventure – ever-present and impossible to ignore. Finally, there’s the [b]Pure Sample[/b]. In “Morality,” it comes in the form of Medusa’s code. As such, it is basically just a Macguffin, though its tie-in to the moral predicament helps redeem it. Meanwhile, Sayer’s Dread Virago in “Catalyst” also seems a weak use of the ingredient at first, but the possibility that the sample might actually be able to be used to make an effective cure strengthens its importance to the adventure manyfold. [b]Reckoning:[/b] So that’s an even split of 3 to 3, with one ingredient being used equally poorly in both entries. Which brings us back to the qualities of the adventures, themselves. hawkeyefan did well in that regard, but MortalPlague did even better. What can I say? [MENTION=6785785]hawkeyefan[/MENTION], you’ve got good vision (in the long run, that’ll be your greatest strength, I think) and you came [i]very[i] close to knocking off a former IRON DM in this round. A little more regard for the parameters of the competition and a little more polish – even just one ingredient integrated a little better – and I think at least two of these judgements might have tilted your way. This time, though, [MENTION=62721]MortalPlague[/MENTION] shows how an IRON DM gets it done and advances, by unanimous decision, to the Championship Round.[/i][/i] [/QUOTE]
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