Upgrade your account to a Community Supporter account and remove most of the site ads.

Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="Dausuul" data-source="post: 5003867" data-attributes="member: 58197">I'm going to diverge a bit from the advice given in the rest of the thread.My inclination would be to say to Jane, in the most polite and friendly way possible, "I'm not sure we'd be a good fit for you, Jane. I can't ask my players to change the way they play, and I'm not going to change the way I run. It doesn't really sound like the kind of game we play is something you'd enjoy. What are you looking for here?"The reason is that it doesn't sound like Jane is really interested in gaming qua gaming. I get the strong impression that this is a case of "Jake and Jane must do everything together." It might be Jake wanting his girlfriend included in every aspect of his life, or it might be Jane wanting to be part of everything Jake does, but either way it isn't Jane wanting to play D&D.So, push back some. If she really does want to play the game, she'll say so when you ask "What are you looking for here?" and you can come to some kind of accommodation. But if Jake is trying to drag her into something she doesn't really want to do, pushing back gives her an out; and if she's trying to insert herself because she doesn't want Jake doing things without her, she won't have a good answer.And consider your own limitations. It's easy to talk about kicking people out of a group, but in practice, most gamers I know (myself included) have a lot of trouble with confrontation. Are you prepared to boot her if her behavior at the gaming table becomes a problem? Are you prepared for the argument with Jake that this will entail? Because it's very possible you'll end up having to do that.(Edit: Dang ninjas. Roguerouge said everything I wanted to say, but said it better.)</blockquote>

Verification