A Dog's Christmas Wish List

Buttercup

Buttercup

Princess of Florin
http://www.randomhouse.com/bantamdell/koontz/extras/extras_trixie.html

This is from Dean Koontz' web site. Trixie is his dog.

MY CHRISTMAS WISH LIST
[font=verdana, arial, helvetica]By Trixie Koontz, Dog
[font=verdana, arial, helvetica]1. Sausage
2. Sausage
3. Sausage
4. Sausage
5. Peanut butter
6. Sausage
7. Potato chips
8. Grapes
9. Meatballs
10. Meatballs
11. Sausage meatballs
12. Peanut-butter sausages
13. Pepcid AC
14. Seventy-eight tennis balls
15. Twenty-five tennis balls
16. Nine rubber balls
17. DVD — "American's Funniest Stupid-Cat Videos"
18. A partridge in a pear tree
19. Bottle of Billy Joe Bob's Partridge Bar-Bee-Que Hot Sauce
20. Sausage
21. Tattoo of Garfield on my butt
22. World peace
23. One hundred snappy comebacks for when Mom and Dad say "bad dog"
24. Psychological counseling for mentally disturbed little dog who thinks he saw cow jump over moon and dish run away with spoon
25. Scientific discovery that cats are sole cause of human aging
26. Seven million pints of wild berry Tofutti
27. Driving lessons
28. Map to Jimmy Dean sausage factory
29. Map to Farmer John Bacon factory
30. Map to Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream factory
31. Liposuction as needed
32. All fleas in hell
33. Night Vision Cat Scope
34. Pepper spray to deal with aggressive mailman
35. Federal law against stupid yellow-vinyl dog raincoats
36. Apology from Disney for stereotyping all dogs as dumb by creating and promoting witless character named Goofy
37. Sausage


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Buttercup said:
27. Driving lessons
28. Map to Jimmy Dean sausage factory
29. Map to Farmer John Bacon factory
30. Map to Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream factory
37. Sausage
Click to expand...

A dog after my own heart. Get me some chocolate chip cookie dough while you're there, Trixie!
 




I'm pretty sure my dogs' list would be shorter. They understand the value of brevity (plus, I don't care how smart Trixie Koontz is, no dog can count that high).

1. Meat
2. Ball/Stick
3. Slow Fat Squirrels
4. A snowblower of her very own (older dog only)/ Constant tummy rubbing (younger dog only)

That's pretty much it. The occasional chance to fetch a duck or run agility is nice, but they've really got simple needs.
 

KC, my dog's needs are simple too, and not unlike yours.

1. Meat.
2. Leftover people food.
3. Squeeky Toys.
4. Squirrels and Rabbits and Birdies, oh my!
5. Belly Rubs.
6. Got any more meat?
 

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