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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Lanefan" data-source="post: 8520912" data-attributes="member: 29398">Collaboration in itself is fine; but the second I get any sense that collaboration is being enforced I'll push back, and hard.We get anough forced groupthink in real life, damned if I want it in the game as well (which is supposed to be an escape anyway).I've had players at my table that, given what seem to be your tastes, would probably send you screaming for the hills. <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />  Not all of them worked out, but those that did will - in the best of ways - never be forgotten.I guess it also comes down to how seriously everyone takes it all.  I take it seriously enough to show up on time for the games and to pay attention during them but that's about it: I'm in it for laughs and entertainment (my own and others'), and I've long since learned not to take anything that happens in play all that seriously.You want your PC to throw down on mine?  Fine, do your best - but you'd better be prepared to lose... <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />I accept (and expect) as a simple fact of life that there's going to be times when I'm at the game but not involved in play.  The reasons for this are many and varied: self-inflicted (I have my PC off doing something else at the time) or due to in-game bad luck (I fail a save and spend a combat paralyzed and unable to act) or because someone else is on a solo mission and I'm waiting back at base, or because I don't at the moment have a character at all (the last one's dead and the replacement hasn't met the party yet).Over the long run ideally these moments tend to cancel out such that everyone is out of action for roughly the same total amount of time.That, and there's always next session for what doesn't get done tonight. <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />I'm not talking about the physical character sheet; generally I'd leave that with the DM anyway.If the DM wanted to use that character later in the campaign, however, at the very least I as its player/owner would expect a request for permission, and if for whatever unlikely reason my answer was "No" I'd expect the DM to show enough integrity to abide by that.A game that in part tries to mirror real life, except with a LOT more freedom to do what you want.Rules are made to be broken, aren't they?If just one person not having fun is enough to veto something it's a wonder anything gets done.  But from other things you've said it doesn't seem that hard-line, so...?My general guiding ethos is "Do what the character would do"; and if that means one character is going to plan for an hour while another will get bored and stir the pot after five minutes then that's exactly what happens.We try not to have players witness things their characters wouldn't, in order to keep player knowledge and character knowledge the same so as to prevent metagaming.  And yes, sometimes this means lots of notes get passed from player to DM and back (and sometimes from player to player) or the DM goes off with a player for a few moments.Back in the day paperback books served the same purpose.A ruling made now becomes a rule for the future.</blockquote>

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