Reply to thread

Message

<blockquote data-quote="Jeff Wilder" data-source="post: 4576441" data-attributes="member: 5122">It's a trick question, because IMO everyone has little ticks and stuff that impacts the fun of other players.&nbsp; Do you recognize yours?&nbsp; If so, do you do anything to ameliorate it?&nbsp; If so, what do you do?Me, I'm a bit of a control freak.&nbsp; This manifests in various ways.(1) Players in the two games in which I'm a player look to me with rules questions -- and worse, actual rulings -- before they look to the other DMs.&nbsp; (Even one of the DMs does this.)(2) I get very impatient when the same players constantly slow the game down.&nbsp; (I growl, &quot;Roll the damn die; if it's a 20, it doesn't matter if you're +8 or +9,&quot; or some variant, every single game session.)(3) I'm similarly impatient when my fellow players make horrible tactical decisions simply because they aren't paying attention.&nbsp; (&quot;I've got a 34 AC, an aberration-bane hammer, 110 HP, and a speed of 20', and you're shooting at the monster on me instead of the monster ripping up the wizard?&nbsp; Seriously?&quot;)(4) I make 90 percent of the decisions for the two groups I play in, and drive the action 90 percent of the time.&nbsp; (I'm not talking about spotlight hogging.&nbsp; For instance, I might suggest, &quot;Nathan, why don't you wild shape and scout things out for us?&quot;&nbsp; At which point the druid and his player rightly have the spotlight.)Anyway, obviously I recognize my problem, and I do try to ameliorate it.&nbsp; I've succeeded ... but only to an extent.&nbsp; The main thing I do to help curb my control-freak impulses is the biggest: I DM a game.&nbsp; I'd honestly rather not, all things being equal (3.5 is a lot of work to DM, and I'm lazy), but if I didn't, I'd have to exile myself from gaming.Otherwise, respectively:(1) When it occurs to me, which is probably about 75 percent of the time, I make it very clear: &quot;It's Louis's game, not mine.&nbsp; His decision.&quot;&nbsp; It should obviously be 100 percent of the time, though.(2) I don't do much about this, because it seriously annoys the hell out of me.&nbsp; 3.5 is already slow enough in combat that you should have all of your modifiers written in front of you.(3) I try to express my frustration through my PC, which in one case is very appropriate, and make it clear that it is my PC who is annoyed.(4) This seems to be a hopeless cause.&nbsp; I've actually created PCs who have absolutely no business making decisions for the group -- my current Int 5 half-ogre, for instance -- and appropriately kept my mouth shut.&nbsp; At which point we, as a group, sit.&nbsp; And sit.&nbsp; And sit.&nbsp; And then a player will ask me what we should do.&nbsp; &quot;I've got an Int of 5!&quot;&nbsp; &quot;Well, your character does, but you can talk out of character!&quot;I've also privately approached other players and asked them to take more of a role in leading the group and driving the action, and they've agreed to it with some enthusiasm.&nbsp; And then gameday comes around, and we sit.&nbsp; And sit.&nbsp; And sit.Thoughts?&nbsp; Anyone else?&nbsp; Confession is good for the soul!</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Jeff Wilder, post: 4576441, member: 5122"] It's a trick question, because IMO everyone has little ticks and stuff that impacts the fun of other players. Do you recognize yours? If so, do you do anything to ameliorate it? If so, what do you do? Me, I'm a bit of a control freak. This manifests in various ways. (1) Players in the two games in which I'm a player look to me with rules questions -- and worse, actual [i]rulings[/i] -- before they look to the other DMs. (Even one of the DMs does this.) (2) I get very impatient when the same players constantly slow the game down. (I growl, "Roll the damn die; if it's a 20, it doesn't matter if you're +8 or +9," or some variant, every single game session.) (3) I'm similarly impatient when my fellow players make horrible tactical decisions [i]simply because they aren't paying attention[/i]. ("I've got a 34 AC, an aberration-bane hammer, 110 HP, and a speed of 20', and you're shooting at the monster on me instead of the monster ripping up the wizard? Seriously?") (4) I make 90 percent of the decisions for the two groups I play in, and drive the action 90 percent of the time. (I'm not talking about spotlight hogging. For instance, I might suggest, "Nathan, why don't you wild shape and scout things out for us?" At which point the druid and his player rightly have the spotlight.) Anyway, obviously I recognize my problem, and I do try to ameliorate it. I've succeeded ... but only to an extent. The main thing I do to help curb my control-freak impulses is the biggest: I DM a game. I'd honestly rather not, all things being equal (3.5 is a lot of work to DM, and I'm lazy), but if I didn't, I'd have to exile myself from gaming. Otherwise, respectively: (1) When it occurs to me, which is probably about 75 percent of the time, I make it very clear: "It's Louis's game, not mine. His decision." It should obviously be 100 percent of the time, though. (2) I don't do much about this, because it [i]seriously[/i] annoys the hell out of me. 3.5 is already slow enough in combat that you should have all of your modifiers written in front of you. (3) I try to express my frustration through my PC, which in one case is very appropriate, and make it clear that it [i]is[/i] my PC who is annoyed. (4) This seems to be a hopeless cause. I've actually created PCs who have [i]absolutely no business[/i] making decisions for the group -- my current Int 5 half-ogre, for instance -- and appropriately kept my mouth shut. At which point we, as a group, sit. And sit. And sit. And then a player will ask me what we should do. "I've got an Int of 5!" "Well, your character does, but you can talk out of character!" I've also privately approached other players and asked them to take more of a role in leading the group and driving the action, and they've agreed to it with some enthusiasm. And then gameday comes around, and we sit. And sit. And sit. Thoughts? Anyone else? Confession is good for the soul! [/QUOTE]

Verification