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Ashamed of being a Gamer?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nymie_the_Pooh" data-source="post: 5830883" data-attributes="member: 6690028"><p>I have been reading the forums on and off for years but wanted to register to weigh in on the main topic.</p><p></p><p>I would love to say I am not ashamed of being a gamer, but I have evidence to the contrary. If I happen to find other gamers there is a general outpouring of all the gamerdom I hold inside. Video games is a little different, but I still keep most of that to myself unless online.</p><p></p><p>I actually got to thinking about this about a month ago. I had a visitor in my home that was here for somebody else. This guy happened to be a police officer which I am still trying to figure out if that had any impact on what happened. I have a couple of bookshelves in my living room with boxes of miniatures on a couple of shelves. There was also a folding table out with the full set of Games Workshop paints and some paints from Reaper and Vallejo with a couple of Apple Barrel colours as well as two pallets and a couple dozen miniatures sitting there in various stages of being painted.</p><p></p><p>This guy was looking for a topic for small talk and piped up with, "Oh! Do you paint miniatures?"</p><p></p><p>My immediate response was to look him in the eye and emphatically state, "No."</p><p></p><p>Yes, it was ridiculous, but it got me thinking. Well, it got me thinking after I finished making up excuses such as telling myself I really meant, "No, but I wish I did."</p><p></p><p>As a kid, I was not allowed to read fantasy novels. I did of course, but not where I could get caught by my parents. My first experience with any sort of roleplaying game was selling off portions of my school lunch to save up money that my mother wouldn't know about and buying a big D&D book off a friend. I don't remember what edition it was, but it had monks in it. Later when I joined my first roleplay group I was disappointed that none of the rulebooks they had for AD&D 2nd edition had rules for monks which is why that point sticks in my mind. I read that book cover to cover and even smuggled it back and forth between home and school even though I was being searched daily.</p><p></p><p>It was worse when I lived with my father for a bit. There was quite a bit religious intolerance. They thought they were doing what was in my best interest, but it helped encourage me to push things down farther. I would have rather been caught alone with pornographic material or drinking the blood of a chicken in either house than be caught with a roleplaying book. For some reason those things were a lot more acceptable and I think some of that worked its way into my subconscious into adulthood.</p><p></p><p>A few years ago I went on vacation to see my father and his father for my grandfather's ninety sixth birthday. While there I checked out a local game store without family even though at the time I thought it was just because that was when was most convenient to do so. I picked up a couple of things and dropped them off where I was staying. My father comes by and stays for a bit and there is the stuff I purchased. He kind of looks at it for a bit then gives me that look. It took all I had not to mutter, "It's not mine. I'm holding it for a friend."</p><p></p><p>The really weird part here is my father is a gamer of sorts. Before I was born he would supplement his income playing chess. He kept books on the game in his car so he could read if out somewhere. He wasn't a professional or anything, but apparently at that time there were places in Southern California where amateurs could go to play games of chess where money was involved. He surfed and did a lot of drugs as well which I guess balances out the weirdness factor for him. Now he plays those Facebook games and is constantly sending me requests. Even with that I still can't even begin to talk with him about games.</p><p></p><p>I'm not sure if I am a closet gamer or if it is an issue with hiding my gaming habits from authority figures as it has always been authority figures that the issue has come up with. I didn't think I was the only one with this problem, but it is nice how I can be open about it even if it is as a faceless person with people I don't know.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nymie_the_Pooh, post: 5830883, member: 6690028"] I have been reading the forums on and off for years but wanted to register to weigh in on the main topic. I would love to say I am not ashamed of being a gamer, but I have evidence to the contrary. If I happen to find other gamers there is a general outpouring of all the gamerdom I hold inside. Video games is a little different, but I still keep most of that to myself unless online. I actually got to thinking about this about a month ago. I had a visitor in my home that was here for somebody else. This guy happened to be a police officer which I am still trying to figure out if that had any impact on what happened. I have a couple of bookshelves in my living room with boxes of miniatures on a couple of shelves. There was also a folding table out with the full set of Games Workshop paints and some paints from Reaper and Vallejo with a couple of Apple Barrel colours as well as two pallets and a couple dozen miniatures sitting there in various stages of being painted. This guy was looking for a topic for small talk and piped up with, "Oh! Do you paint miniatures?" My immediate response was to look him in the eye and emphatically state, "No." Yes, it was ridiculous, but it got me thinking. Well, it got me thinking after I finished making up excuses such as telling myself I really meant, "No, but I wish I did." As a kid, I was not allowed to read fantasy novels. I did of course, but not where I could get caught by my parents. My first experience with any sort of roleplaying game was selling off portions of my school lunch to save up money that my mother wouldn't know about and buying a big D&D book off a friend. I don't remember what edition it was, but it had monks in it. Later when I joined my first roleplay group I was disappointed that none of the rulebooks they had for AD&D 2nd edition had rules for monks which is why that point sticks in my mind. I read that book cover to cover and even smuggled it back and forth between home and school even though I was being searched daily. It was worse when I lived with my father for a bit. There was quite a bit religious intolerance. They thought they were doing what was in my best interest, but it helped encourage me to push things down farther. I would have rather been caught alone with pornographic material or drinking the blood of a chicken in either house than be caught with a roleplaying book. For some reason those things were a lot more acceptable and I think some of that worked its way into my subconscious into adulthood. A few years ago I went on vacation to see my father and his father for my grandfather's ninety sixth birthday. While there I checked out a local game store without family even though at the time I thought it was just because that was when was most convenient to do so. I picked up a couple of things and dropped them off where I was staying. My father comes by and stays for a bit and there is the stuff I purchased. He kind of looks at it for a bit then gives me that look. It took all I had not to mutter, "It's not mine. I'm holding it for a friend." The really weird part here is my father is a gamer of sorts. Before I was born he would supplement his income playing chess. He kept books on the game in his car so he could read if out somewhere. He wasn't a professional or anything, but apparently at that time there were places in Southern California where amateurs could go to play games of chess where money was involved. He surfed and did a lot of drugs as well which I guess balances out the weirdness factor for him. Now he plays those Facebook games and is constantly sending me requests. Even with that I still can't even begin to talk with him about games. I'm not sure if I am a closet gamer or if it is an issue with hiding my gaming habits from authority figures as it has always been authority figures that the issue has come up with. I didn't think I was the only one with this problem, but it is nice how I can be open about it even if it is as a faceless person with people I don't know. [/QUOTE]
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