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<blockquote data-quote="catsclaw227" data-source="post: 5833051" data-attributes="member: 14197"><p>See, I really don't get this. I am quite confident that she would understand EVEN LESS if she found out he has been lying to her for years and years, for two children... Her first thought would be, "What else has he been lying about for all these years..." The lying would end my marriage, for sure.</p><p></p><p>I am only up to page 6 here, but in my experience, some of the gamer-shame might come from when you started gaming. If you started in late 70's early 80's the geekiness of it got you beat up in school, or ostracized at least. Luckily for me, I was a chameleon. I had nerd friends, hippie/guitar-in-the-quad friends, jock friends and the cheerleaders thought I was a little cutie (in a friend kind of way).</p><p></p><p>As I got older, I learned that I didn't really have to hide it, but I didn't advertise it. Then, even later, into my 30's and now into my 40's, I still don't advertise, but I don't make a bones about my hobbies. I am also a raging Pittsburgh Steeler fan - since I was 6 years old when I learned about football. </p><p></p><p>My first wife and my current wife aren't gamers but they accept it in me and I told them about it while dating - I couldn't hide something from them that I liked so much. </p><p></p><p>Now, if a friend posted a pic of me at the D&D table on Facebook, it would bother me, since I am not the kind of Facebooker that shares every little thing about themselves. I do like some of my privacy. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> For me, Facebook is for pics of my family and daughter, saying hi to old high-school and college friends and maybe posting some work-related topical item.</p><p></p><p>My current employer doesn't know, only because I work from home, and it has never come up. My previous employer knew because I had my wife drop off some stuff for an afterwork game, and instead of just putting it in my car, she brought it up to me.</p><p></p><p>I am, like others, though, embarrassed by some of the other gamers I have met. Stinky, obnoxious, loud and generally socially-stunted, I don't hang out with or even like to play with these types, but they can give us a bad name. </p><p></p><p>My game group consists of four software/IT professionals, a semi-pro race car driver, a thrash metal musician who doubles as a librarian at a major educational institution and a paramedic. Go figure...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="catsclaw227, post: 5833051, member: 14197"] See, I really don't get this. I am quite confident that she would understand EVEN LESS if she found out he has been lying to her for years and years, for two children... Her first thought would be, "What else has he been lying about for all these years..." The lying would end my marriage, for sure. I am only up to page 6 here, but in my experience, some of the gamer-shame might come from when you started gaming. If you started in late 70's early 80's the geekiness of it got you beat up in school, or ostracized at least. Luckily for me, I was a chameleon. I had nerd friends, hippie/guitar-in-the-quad friends, jock friends and the cheerleaders thought I was a little cutie (in a friend kind of way). As I got older, I learned that I didn't really have to hide it, but I didn't advertise it. Then, even later, into my 30's and now into my 40's, I still don't advertise, but I don't make a bones about my hobbies. I am also a raging Pittsburgh Steeler fan - since I was 6 years old when I learned about football. My first wife and my current wife aren't gamers but they accept it in me and I told them about it while dating - I couldn't hide something from them that I liked so much. Now, if a friend posted a pic of me at the D&D table on Facebook, it would bother me, since I am not the kind of Facebooker that shares every little thing about themselves. I do like some of my privacy. :) For me, Facebook is for pics of my family and daughter, saying hi to old high-school and college friends and maybe posting some work-related topical item. My current employer doesn't know, only because I work from home, and it has never come up. My previous employer knew because I had my wife drop off some stuff for an afterwork game, and instead of just putting it in my car, she brought it up to me. I am, like others, though, embarrassed by some of the other gamers I have met. Stinky, obnoxious, loud and generally socially-stunted, I don't hang out with or even like to play with these types, but they can give us a bad name. My game group consists of four software/IT professionals, a semi-pro race car driver, a thrash metal musician who doubles as a librarian at a major educational institution and a paramedic. Go figure... [/QUOTE]
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