NOW LIVE! X Marks the Spot: Piratical Resources for your 5E game

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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Goonalan" data-source="post: 3692378" data-attributes="member: 16069">Turn 6: Is dat pineapple?The spear lands flush between Auntie shoulder-blades.Thwung.And bounces off, a light blue shivering force field surrounds Auntie for a second, she grins as she flops the last step to the floor, Heckler at the ready.But before she can fire The Professor appears, something in hand, he throws the object into the midst of the Goblins.“Duck, dear lady.”Auntie crouches- turns away from the Goblins.The bumpy object skitters into the midst of the Goblins.“Is that pineapple?”FWOOOOOOMThe room shakes, explodes with flame, parts of the ceiling shiver and crash down.All that is left are charred stumps of the Goblin’s legs- it smells bad. Flames still lick; it’s as if the stone has caught fire in a twenty foot radius, some of the fruit on Auntie’s hat is charred and blistered.“Cough. Cough. I thought you wanted to keep one alive?”“Cough. I feared for your safety madam. I didn’t want to take any chances.”The pair tidy up and head on out.Another corridor outside of the door, they head off again in a random direction- looking for trouble and the answers to The Professor’s questions.A little later they get their wish, another Goblin patrol.Pat-a-pat-a-pat-a-pat-a-pat-a.Auntie’s Uzi sings- she takes down two of the four in the patrol, the other two look around spot the pair and head off in another direction entirely- screaming.The Professor dashes forward, holding his hat still with one hand and his taser in the other.Flung-Tsksksksksk.He scores a hit, the Goblin dances a second then slumps to the floor. The other is away.The Professor heads over grabs the Goblin and slinks down another corridor, at the end of the corridor there are two options, left to a door, and right to what looks to be a large lift.“Madam, it seems we have located a way down, it also therefore follows that there is something down from here- may I suggest we head that way, with alacrity.”Auntie catches up, wrenches the concertina-style lift door open, the two dive in.The pair of them release a lever, the lift descends, somewhere, not very far away, they can hear the sound of Goblin voices- it doesn’t sound as if they want to make friends.It takes a while, and on the way The Professor makes a discovery, the Goblin is dead- there’s no information to be had here.“The Goblins seem to have a particularly thin skin, note to self, the taser may be of less use than I first imagined.”Auntie nods, “Shame, cute little beggar, close up- when you get close up, do you think we’re doing the right thing, oughtn’t we to just make friends?”The Professor thinks about it, “A kind thought madam, and yet, I fear that what lies below will perhaps be less amenable to that suggestion.”Auntie nods again, searches in her pocket, “Toffee?”The Professor nods, reaches in and takes one, it’s covered in fluff.“Good for you, fluff.” Auntie offers.The Professor takes his chances, chews.Auntie does likewise.“It stiks ta yer…”“Teef. I gnaw.” She finishes off The Professor’s thought.CLUNGThe lift’s down, The Professor’s torch beam lances out into the dark, broken by the caged sides of the lift it forms eerie shadows, bars, as if they’re in a cell.Then a face.Another.And another.“Brains.”“Kidneys”“Livers”“Spleens”“Carrots.”Obviously one of them was a vegetarian, they’re a mixture of Dwarves and Men, Zombies, they’re closing in.BOOOM BOOOM BOOOM BOOOMAnd then it slows down.BOOOMAnd.BOOOM.When Auntie realises that the Zombies can’t get the lift door open, fish in a barrel, she blasts away until the six Zombies are dead again.A short time later the pair are out and exploring their new environment.“It’s a mine… We’re close. We must be. Auntie we’re nearly home.”The octogenarian grins, reloads the Heckler, nodding all the while.In the chamber is a mine cart, it’s on a track.Gong.The Professor raps the side of the cart.“What do you think?”“I haven’t got my license.”“Neither have I.”The Professor grabs a barrow, overturns it, and uses it to climb into the cart, there’s a brake of sorts- it’s on.He leans over the side, offers his hand to Auntie.“Fancy a spin, dear lady?”“Perhaps a little run, the wind in my hair, it might do me good.”She grins, takes the proffered hand, and climbs in.Wheeka-wheeka-wheeka.The Professor releases the brake.Sniiiiiiiik-sniiiik-sniiik-snik-snik-snik.The cart trundles forward, into a wall of blackness.Next Turn: Run-run-RUN-runaway.</blockquote>

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