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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Thunderfoot" data-source="post: 3969741" data-attributes="member: 34175">KB,You haven't said how long this has been going on...If you are recently a couple (though from your past posts I find this unlikely) then it may simply be a matter of time, but I think it may be the family trying to tell you in a subtle way that they aren't comfortable with the name situation.Please hear me out, and I am not saying they/you are right (I find often in these cases there really isn't a right or wrong, strictly a their opinion/my opinion), but try to think about this from their angle.In some families, names are a big deal, some cannot wait for their sons to grow up, marry find a bride and pass on the FAMILY name.  It is old fashioned, but I too find myself wanting the same thing.  Honestly, if a young woman married my son and then didn't want to take his name, I would feel hurt and somewhat confused as to why his name wasn't good enough for her.  Again, I don't think your position is wrong, and obviously you and your sweetie pea discussed this at some length.  But often times, what you feel is right may not extend to other family members.There are several reasons for disgruntled spouse disapproval, race, religion, political views; you know hot button issues (all reasons why they are frowned upon here at ENworld) but tradition, history and the like can also be just as important to some people.  Many people have stated that your husband should talk to his family and I agree, but instead of only informing them of your choice, he might want to find out if there is a reason behind their apparent lack of respect for that choice.  It may simply be a matter of them feeling hurt by the decision and left out in some way - meaning that they feel they are the ones who are hurt.Hopefully I made myself clear and don't come off being either condescending or dismissive, that is most certainly NOT my intent, but just trying to get you to see that maybe there might be a reason (valid or otherwise) that they believe in their stance as much as you believe in yours.Hopefully this helps, if not, then please, by all means disregard.  Thunderfoot <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /></blockquote>

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