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Story Hour
carpedavid's Land of the Crane (Updated 11 May, 2006)
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<blockquote data-quote="TDRandall" data-source="post: 2134419" data-attributes="member: 4808"><p>Another great post, Carpedavid!</p><p></p><p>This description: "thousands of tiny, hooked barbs. He grimaced as chunks of his skin ripped away from his fist, and tried to fight off a wave of nausea" was delightfully gruesome, and yet not overdone.</p><p></p><p>This description: "The words flew from her mouth and swirled above the oni, like bats in a feeding frenzy. Then, suddenly, a pillar of flame erupted from the middle of the swarm and struck the middle of the tentacled creature" I thought was very evocative (oops, is that a pun?)</p><p></p><p>"It's good that they know their place" is so .... Samurai. Fits in well to the aura of the land, is stated so matter-of-factly and couldn't help but raise the American "freedom and fairness" hackles on the back of my neck.</p><p></p><p>Nice setup for possible recurring characters and relationship situations. Depending on how long the delivery of the offering to the Fire Crane actually ends up taking, they could find a very different situation back home from what they left!</p><p></p><p>OK - "world" questions! (if they won't spoil anything, of course)</p><p></p><p>I don't remember Shugenja developing a shadow walk ability. Something I overlooked/forgot? An addition for your world? Or is Taka hiding another class somewhere in her past?</p><p></p><p>It's from the prior post, but what race is Mr. Straw hair/sapphire eyes? </p><p></p><p>Some odd/funny things (just my brain misfiring, most likely!)</p><p></p><p>If a ninja in disguise can be positively identified so easily, then perhaps he's not much of a ninja! Why did the group think Isobe Jin was one in disguise? Did they actually state that in game (which would seem to be incredibly dishonoring if he wasn't a ninja, and incredibly foolish if he was since it seems like he should eliminate a threat to his secrecy) or was it just the group's general consensus after the fact? How prevalent are ninjas in the land, in actuality and in story? (Could they be mislabeling him based simply on the fact that he "seemed" shadey or not-forthright so he "must" be a ninja according to conventional "wisdom"?)</p><p></p><p>The conversation and even the noticing the familiarity of the sword DURING the battle was a bit strange. Maybe on the run down to the battle or after it's all done and everyone is catching their breath, but once all attention should be on defeating the enemy it seemed out of place. Almost ... superheroish?</p><p></p><p>I checked the internet on what escrima sticks were, so NOW I know. But I'm far from being a martial arts lingo expert, so when I was first reading through my neurons misfired and saw "eczema". Oy Vay!</p><p></p><p>I'm intrigued about the setup for next time. Are the bakemono running away from the farmer because he routed them? Or is he's chasing them trying to get something back? Or could he actually somehow be their leader and he's hearding the group to take on our stalwart PCs? I know I know, I'll just have to wait like the rest of the peanut gallery.</p><p></p><p>Oh, I'm looking forward to some more character development/back story. Kakeru in particular seems to be fading into the woodwork - is he an active PC, inactive PC, or DM run NPC at this point in the story?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TDRandall, post: 2134419, member: 4808"] Another great post, Carpedavid! This description: "thousands of tiny, hooked barbs. He grimaced as chunks of his skin ripped away from his fist, and tried to fight off a wave of nausea" was delightfully gruesome, and yet not overdone. This description: "The words flew from her mouth and swirled above the oni, like bats in a feeding frenzy. Then, suddenly, a pillar of flame erupted from the middle of the swarm and struck the middle of the tentacled creature" I thought was very evocative (oops, is that a pun?) "It's good that they know their place" is so .... Samurai. Fits in well to the aura of the land, is stated so matter-of-factly and couldn't help but raise the American "freedom and fairness" hackles on the back of my neck. Nice setup for possible recurring characters and relationship situations. Depending on how long the delivery of the offering to the Fire Crane actually ends up taking, they could find a very different situation back home from what they left! OK - "world" questions! (if they won't spoil anything, of course) I don't remember Shugenja developing a shadow walk ability. Something I overlooked/forgot? An addition for your world? Or is Taka hiding another class somewhere in her past? It's from the prior post, but what race is Mr. Straw hair/sapphire eyes? Some odd/funny things (just my brain misfiring, most likely!) If a ninja in disguise can be positively identified so easily, then perhaps he's not much of a ninja! Why did the group think Isobe Jin was one in disguise? Did they actually state that in game (which would seem to be incredibly dishonoring if he wasn't a ninja, and incredibly foolish if he was since it seems like he should eliminate a threat to his secrecy) or was it just the group's general consensus after the fact? How prevalent are ninjas in the land, in actuality and in story? (Could they be mislabeling him based simply on the fact that he "seemed" shadey or not-forthright so he "must" be a ninja according to conventional "wisdom"?) The conversation and even the noticing the familiarity of the sword DURING the battle was a bit strange. Maybe on the run down to the battle or after it's all done and everyone is catching their breath, but once all attention should be on defeating the enemy it seemed out of place. Almost ... superheroish? I checked the internet on what escrima sticks were, so NOW I know. But I'm far from being a martial arts lingo expert, so when I was first reading through my neurons misfired and saw "eczema". Oy Vay! I'm intrigued about the setup for next time. Are the bakemono running away from the farmer because he routed them? Or is he's chasing them trying to get something back? Or could he actually somehow be their leader and he's hearding the group to take on our stalwart PCs? I know I know, I'll just have to wait like the rest of the peanut gallery. Oh, I'm looking forward to some more character development/back story. Kakeru in particular seems to be fading into the woodwork - is he an active PC, inactive PC, or DM run NPC at this point in the story? [/QUOTE]
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carpedavid's Land of the Crane (Updated 11 May, 2006)
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