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<blockquote data-quote="FormerlyHemlock" data-source="post: 6708864" data-attributes="member: 6787650">Perhaps I didn't make my point clearly:It is really disruptive to fun to have other people inside one's &quot;fun cycle.&quot; If you're constantly on the lookout for negative emotions from other people, you can't just kick back and play. Have you ever been the adult on a volleyball team when everyone else is a nine-year-old? Now imagine that the nine-year-olds, instead of being relaxed about who's got the spotlight, experience negative emotions every time you hit the ball instead of them. Now you have two opponents, the other team and the emotions of your teammates. You can't just play, you have to be very careful not to play too well.For me at least, that is a nightmare, and that is what your scenario describes.What is the most fun is to play with kids who don't experience jealousy (jealous: &quot;feeling resentment against someone because of that person's rivalry, success, or advantages&quot;) so you can all just play and have a good relaxed time. If that can't happen, it's better just to recuse one's self from the team and say, &quot;Here, let me find you another nine-year-old.&quot;</blockquote>

[QUOTE="FormerlyHemlock, post: 6708864, member: 6787650"] Perhaps I didn't make my point clearly: It is really disruptive to fun to have other people inside one's "fun cycle." If you're constantly on the lookout for negative emotions from other people, you can't just kick back and play. Have you ever been the adult on a volleyball team when everyone else is a nine-year-old? Now imagine that the nine-year-olds, instead of being relaxed about who's got the spotlight, experience negative emotions every time you hit the ball instead of them. Now you have two opponents, the other team and the emotions of your teammates. You can't just play, you have to be very careful not to play too well. For me at least, that is a nightmare, and that is what your scenario describes. What is the most fun is to play with kids who don't experience jealousy (jealous: "feeling resentment against someone because of that person's rivalry, success, or advantages") so you can all just play and have a good relaxed time. If that can't happen, it's better just to recuse one's self from the team and say, "Here, let me find you another nine-year-old." [/QUOTE]

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