Upgrade your account to a Community Supporter account and remove most of the site ads.

Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="James Heard" data-source="post: 2825434" data-attributes="member: 7280">It's not assertive, it's confrontational. It's rude. Calling someone a cheater isn't something you do with your friends, unless you're through with them as being their friends in my book. It's a loaded word with loaded connotations. It's in no way perpelexing or arbitrary: Do I want to still retain someone as a friend or do I want to have a fight with them, or at least risk having a fight with them? Sure, someone can cheat enough that I DON'T want them as my friends anymore, but in most cases those people never make it to friend status in the first place. Why bother playing with someone routinely whose presence isn't worth disregarding occasional social lapses over?I don't have a problem with confrontation. I have problems with starting fights and risking friendships over some stupid game that really is the least important aspect of my life in general. Why is it that some people are willing to confront people when doing so discomforts others, risks the enjoyment of people that you may have known for years, that breaches what should be a relaxed social atmosphere amongst friends? Again and again, I see responses that say "It's worth it," and I can't help but wonder what sort of friends someone has when they're worth risking for the sake of the roll of a die.I hope you realize how rude and presumptious that sounds? I don't have any problem with my games, and I don't really recall the last time I really had a problem with my games being screwed up since my sophomore year in highschool. Stop being an jerk about this subject, please. Is that assertive enough? And some people can take that step back at the table and get over it. It's called being mature about a game enough to recognize that nothing that hardly anything that happens in imaginary RPG-land is worth getting so upset about that you toss your friends over. Sure, if you're running a game with someone you don't know and they're a problem, toss 'em. New players are a dime a dozen sometimes. I've known some of the people I play games with for almost two decades now, babysat their kids as they grew up, been their best man at their weddings, and drove them home drunk after their divorces. If they want to pee on my kitchen floor while I'm watching, they've earned the right to do it (once or twice at least). If they're doing something that looks like cheating, or even IS cheating, they've earned the right to be trusted through whatever weird mental tick they've got going on. It's a game, and they can't do much that damages what goes on external to the game by messing around internal to the game. Dealing with cheating, on the other hand, is about broaching the game and making a broader statement with implications about the general state of trust between friends, it's not in the game because the game stops to accuse people of cheating. It looks like cheating, could I be wrong? Could it be a mistake? Is it that important to me? What exactly happens to relationships when you casually bandy about terms and implications like "you cheated me", "you're lying to me", and "you've betrayed me." Sure, if that's what's going on then that's fine; but I've got some people that could lie to me forever and I'd trust to have my best interests at heart. And yeah, I know some friends that, lets face it, I'm never quite certain if they're just dumb about the rules or cheating during a game often - that I think would probably jump in front of a bullet for me.</blockquote>

Verification