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<blockquote data-quote="Eccles" data-source="post: 1549764" data-attributes="member: 5675">They slapped the goblin. It had no effect on its deeply unconscious form. Still amidst the bodies of the fallen zombies, in the middle of a colossal field of mushrooms, they finally decided to create water over the creature's head. It awoke, gasping and spluttering. Then it saw the party, screamed, and nearly fainted again.&quot;Will you shut up?!&quot; Miles' sword was drawn almost instantly, and placed along the bound goblin's neck.&quot;Eeep,&quot; whispered the goblin, staring down the 18 inches of razor sharp steel. &quot;Kobold be good. Kobold be quiet. Kobold sorry.&quot;&quot;Kobold?&quot; asked almost everybody, staring at the goblin in incredulity.The goblin shook his head, lips firmly pressed together, eyes still crossed to focus on the glowing blade before him. He could have sworn it was muttering something to him, but he couldn't understand what any of the outlanders were saying. Silent tears began to roll down his face as he began trembling.&quot;Stop moving!&quot; bellowed Miles at the creature in goblinoid. &quot;And tell me what you're talking about. Kobold indeed.&quot;&quot;Kobold is Kobold's name, great Lord. Please let Kobold go. Kobold be good.&quot;Miles flicked his sword at Halbrinn's gnomish figure. &quot;He'd say the only good kobold was a dead kobold.&quot;The goblin shrieked again, and then began jabbering. &quot;Kobold not kobold. Kobold goblin. Kobold not be good. Kobold sorry. Please not kill Kobold. Kobold help carry your filth?&quot;The incredible offer hung in the air, whilst the goblin whimpered, totally confused by his need not to be seen as being good. The sword terrified him. The Crusaders stared at one another, and had a short discussion in common.&quot;Kill it,&quot; was Miles' instant suggestion.&quot;Not fair. Untie it and let it go,&quot; replied Yvgeny.&quot;Untie it?&quot; Miles seemed outraged. &quot;Leave it tied up with some water.&quot;The group stared at him in silence. Kobold the goblin jabbered in his his own language in the background, seemingly determined not to be seen as being &quot;good&quot;.&quot;Miles,&quot; said Halbrinn exhasperatedly. &quot;That would kill it&quot;.&quot;Yep.&quot; Miles seemed pleased with his logic. &quot;I tell you what. You all go away, and I'll deal with the goblin.&quot;&quot;You mean you'll kill it.&quot;&quot;Yes. Is that a problem?&quot;&quot;YES!&quot;&quot;It's never been a problem before. I mean; you turn your backs, and I remove the problem.&quot;&quot;Miles,&quot; Halbrinn explained. &quot;First of all, that's never happened before and you know it. Secondly, it's just…&quot; He waved his hands in the direction of the creature, trying to get across the right signals for 'tiny inoffensive harmless goblin'.&quot;Yeah. It's a goblin. So we should kill it.&quot;&quot;It's cure. Could we keep it as a pet?&quot;&quot;Shut up Aeron,&quot; both Miles and Halbrinn said, without even looking around.Halbrinn glanced at his companions, saw indifference on the face Jason, no actual help coming from any other quarters, and gave up.&quot;Perhaps if we just questioned it at let it go?&quot;&quot;Question it? Excellent idea.&quot; Miles finally agreed with his comrade.The blade darted back to the goblin's neck. Bound tightly, he shrank away, as a terrible penetrating stench surrounded them all.&quot;OK. I don't want it as a pet any more,&quot; announced Aeron.Screeching and jabbering, the goblin explained to them firstly that Kobold was the name traditionally given to the runt of a goblin litter. Their second question, &quot;Why were you serving the undead?&quot; was met with the scornful look of a goblin down on its luck.&quot;Because they catch Kobold. Why else kobold help smelly undead? Kobold free, then drow catch Kobold. Then Kobold carry filth for drow. Then Kobold catched by Dread Lord, and Kobold carry filth for, until Kobold catched by undeads, and Kobold carry filth for them. Now Kobold catched by you. Where you want filth?&quot;&quot;Hold on there, little stinky britches. What was that about a &quot;Dread Lord?&quot;&quot;Kobold proud to carry Dread Lord filth. Dread Lord smash up drow. Squish, squish, squish. Kobold like it when drow go squish. Dread Lord attack city, overthrow all drow, and all goblins and hobgoblins, and orcs, and ogres, and mephits, and creepers, and rocks, and plants, and mushrooms all turn on drow and all go squish! Squish! Squish!&quot;&quot;So you served the Dread Lord? What did he look like? Big? Horns? Flames? Wings?&quot; Miles demanded of the pitiful wretch.&quot;Yes, yes, yes, yes! And if he see you mistreat kobold, you all go squish squish too!&quot; Wide goblin eyes stared around at the group.&quot;Nonsense. Nothing's going to squish us. Now tell us more about this Dread Lord.&quot;&quot;Kobold know nothing much. Kobold only saw Dread Lord once, squishing drow. Squish Squish. He mighty powerful and rules where no drow go. He has ogres and giants and an 'nellyphant.&quot;&quot;An elephant?&quot;&quot;Yeah, an nellyphant&quot;.&quot;Anything else?&quot;&quot;Not that kobold know of…&quot;Miles abruptly stabbed the goblin. The pitiful naked wretch quivered, and his legs shook, then all was still.&quot;Well that's all that goblin's going to tell us,&quot; announced Miles smugly to the rest of the group.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Eccles, post: 1549764, member: 5675"] They slapped the goblin. It had no effect on its deeply unconscious form. Still amidst the bodies of the fallen zombies, in the middle of a colossal field of mushrooms, they finally decided to [I]create water[/I] over the creature's head. It awoke, gasping and spluttering. Then it saw the party, screamed, and nearly fainted again. "Will you shut up?!" Miles' sword was drawn almost instantly, and placed along the bound goblin's neck. "Eeep," whispered the goblin, staring down the 18 inches of razor sharp steel. "Kobold be good. Kobold be quiet. Kobold sorry." "Kobold?" asked almost everybody, staring at the goblin in incredulity. The goblin shook his head, lips firmly pressed together, eyes still crossed to focus on the glowing blade before him. He could have sworn it was muttering something to him, but he couldn't understand what any of the outlanders were saying. Silent tears began to roll down his face as he began trembling. "Stop moving!" bellowed Miles at the creature in goblinoid. "And tell me what you're talking about. Kobold indeed." "Kobold is Kobold's name, great Lord. Please let Kobold go. Kobold be good." Miles flicked his sword at Halbrinn's gnomish figure. "He'd say the only good kobold was a dead kobold." The goblin shrieked again, and then began jabbering. "Kobold not kobold. Kobold goblin. Kobold not be good. Kobold sorry. Please not kill Kobold. Kobold help carry your filth?" The incredible offer hung in the air, whilst the goblin whimpered, totally confused by his need not to be seen as being good. The sword terrified him. The Crusaders stared at one another, and had a short discussion in common. "Kill it," was Miles' instant suggestion. "Not fair. Untie it and let it go," replied Yvgeny. "Untie it?" Miles seemed outraged. "Leave it tied up with some water." The group stared at him in silence. Kobold the goblin jabbered in his his own language in the background, seemingly determined not to be seen as being "good". "Miles," said Halbrinn exhasperatedly. "That would kill it". "Yep." Miles seemed pleased with his logic. "I tell you what. You all go away, and I'll deal with the goblin." "You mean you'll kill it." "Yes. Is that a problem?" "YES!" "It's never been a problem before. I mean; you turn your backs, and I remove the problem." "Miles," Halbrinn explained. "First of all, that's never happened before and you know it. Secondly, it's just…" He waved his hands in the direction of the creature, trying to get across the right signals for 'tiny inoffensive harmless goblin'. "Yeah. It's a goblin. So we should kill it." "It's cure. Could we keep it as a pet?" "Shut up Aeron," both Miles and Halbrinn said, without even looking around. Halbrinn glanced at his companions, saw indifference on the face Jason, no actual help coming from any other quarters, and gave up. "Perhaps if we just questioned it at let it go?" "Question it? Excellent idea." Miles finally agreed with his comrade. The blade darted back to the goblin's neck. Bound tightly, he shrank away, as a terrible penetrating stench surrounded them all. "OK. I don't want it as a pet any more," announced Aeron. Screeching and jabbering, the goblin explained to them firstly that Kobold was the name traditionally given to the runt of a goblin litter. Their second question, "Why were you serving the undead?" was met with the scornful look of a goblin down on its luck. "Because they catch Kobold. Why else kobold help smelly undead? Kobold free, then drow catch Kobold. Then Kobold carry filth for drow. Then Kobold catched by Dread Lord, and Kobold carry filth for, until Kobold catched by undeads, and Kobold carry filth for them. Now Kobold catched by you. Where you want filth?" "Hold on there, little stinky britches. What was that about a "Dread Lord?" "Kobold proud to carry Dread Lord filth. Dread Lord smash up drow. Squish, squish, squish. Kobold like it when drow go squish. Dread Lord attack city, overthrow all drow, and all goblins and hobgoblins, and orcs, and ogres, and mephits, and creepers, and rocks, and plants, and mushrooms all turn on drow and all go squish! Squish! Squish!" "So you served the Dread Lord? What did he look like? Big? Horns? Flames? Wings?" Miles demanded of the pitiful wretch. "Yes, yes, yes, yes! And if he see you mistreat kobold, you all go squish squish too!" Wide goblin eyes stared around at the group. "Nonsense. Nothing's going to squish us. Now tell us more about this Dread Lord." "Kobold know nothing much. Kobold only saw Dread Lord once, squishing drow. Squish Squish. He mighty powerful and rules where no drow go. He has ogres and giants and an 'nellyphant." "An elephant?" "Yeah, an nellyphant". "Anything else?" "Not that kobold know of…" Miles abruptly stabbed the goblin. The pitiful naked wretch quivered, and his legs shook, then all was still. "Well that's all that goblin's going to tell us," announced Miles smugly to the rest of the group. [/QUOTE]

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