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[CoC] A Comedy of Cthulhu
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<blockquote data-quote="DM with a vengence" data-source="post: 189570" data-attributes="member: 1679"><p>Nikki floated towards the light, unfortunately, it was, as they say, on fire. She burst through and for a moment saw a mass of dark protoplasmic tentacles spreading to infinity. The thin piping of a flute reached her ears as her mind took one look at everything, gibbered twice, and fell apart. </p><p></p><p>Cultists and Outer Gods-2. Investigators-4.</p><p></p><p>Marta and the Librarian made it to the Deans office, where he asked for their stories. “I went to his office to talk to him, and he tried tom push me down and rape me! Rape!” He nodded, and looked over to the librarian.</p><p>“She came into my office with a stack of books from the restricted section, and asked for a box so she could take them to get photocopied. Photocopied! Do you know what the bright lights would do to those fragile books.” He grabbed a large dictionary from a book shelf and slammed it down onto the desk, spreading the pages out. Everybody winced as the spine cracked. “She would have destroyed them. I demand to have here access to the restricted section revoked. How did she get access anyway?”</p><p>Marta gulped. “Could I make a phone call.”</p><p></p><p>David’s cell phone rung just as he was taking a fiber sample from the carpet. “Hello, David Chaise, Parapyschologist, what can I debunk for you? What do you mean ‘In the dean’s office’? Crap. I’ll be down there ASAP.” He stood up. “Folks, I need to see someone, I’ll be back in 30.”</p><p></p><p>“We’re doing a brief investigation on how secure parts of the college are, sir.” David explained to the incredulous crowd. “We got your signature and forged a restricted section access. Marta was assigned to infiltrate the restricted section, it seemed harmless.”</p><p>The librarian blanched. “Harmless? Harmless? Those books are restricted for a reason. I’m just glad she’s still in one piece, especially after the incident three years ago.”</p><p>“Well since nothing was damage, I’ll let you get away with this one, but next time, tell someone before planning anything like this.” The Dean smiled.</p><p>David and Marta left the room.</p><p></p><p>David rejoined his class, and they then drove to the site of the rave. It was completely empty, with no signs of mankind except for a single set of tire tracks leading to and away from the meadow. The class began taking tests; David pulled out a pocket magnetometer, and turned it on. The needle jumped to the red zone, and the device began to spark. He turned it off and took out a map of Arkham and drew a circle from the dorm to the field, looking for any other fields of considerable size. “Okay people. I want us to split up and go to these fields and do the works, infrared, UV, photo, soil samples, magnetometer, and get it all tested. We meet back at Dr. Morgan’s office at 5:00.” The class rushed off to their appointed tasks, chattering about how cool it was to get some field experience.</p><p></p><p>Later, in Dr. Morgan’s office. “Anybody pick up anything.”</p><p>“Uh, David, wasn’t that first field the site of that big rave?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“We didn’t see a single sign of people. There should have been something there, at least a water bottle or glowstick.”</p><p>“Right, where did it all go?”</p><p>“Crap my friend was at that rave.”</p><p>David spoke up. “Bill, I think you should get a video camera on that.”</p><p></p><p>And in other news:</p><p>Marta picked up Saquina at the hospital, and John ran into Crazy Mental Patient Leopold at the Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DM with a vengence, post: 189570, member: 1679"] Nikki floated towards the light, unfortunately, it was, as they say, on fire. She burst through and for a moment saw a mass of dark protoplasmic tentacles spreading to infinity. The thin piping of a flute reached her ears as her mind took one look at everything, gibbered twice, and fell apart. Cultists and Outer Gods-2. Investigators-4. Marta and the Librarian made it to the Deans office, where he asked for their stories. “I went to his office to talk to him, and he tried tom push me down and rape me! Rape!” He nodded, and looked over to the librarian. “She came into my office with a stack of books from the restricted section, and asked for a box so she could take them to get photocopied. Photocopied! Do you know what the bright lights would do to those fragile books.” He grabbed a large dictionary from a book shelf and slammed it down onto the desk, spreading the pages out. Everybody winced as the spine cracked. “She would have destroyed them. I demand to have here access to the restricted section revoked. How did she get access anyway?” Marta gulped. “Could I make a phone call.” David’s cell phone rung just as he was taking a fiber sample from the carpet. “Hello, David Chaise, Parapyschologist, what can I debunk for you? What do you mean ‘In the dean’s office’? Crap. I’ll be down there ASAP.” He stood up. “Folks, I need to see someone, I’ll be back in 30.” “We’re doing a brief investigation on how secure parts of the college are, sir.” David explained to the incredulous crowd. “We got your signature and forged a restricted section access. Marta was assigned to infiltrate the restricted section, it seemed harmless.” The librarian blanched. “Harmless? Harmless? Those books are restricted for a reason. I’m just glad she’s still in one piece, especially after the incident three years ago.” “Well since nothing was damage, I’ll let you get away with this one, but next time, tell someone before planning anything like this.” The Dean smiled. David and Marta left the room. David rejoined his class, and they then drove to the site of the rave. It was completely empty, with no signs of mankind except for a single set of tire tracks leading to and away from the meadow. The class began taking tests; David pulled out a pocket magnetometer, and turned it on. The needle jumped to the red zone, and the device began to spark. He turned it off and took out a map of Arkham and drew a circle from the dorm to the field, looking for any other fields of considerable size. “Okay people. I want us to split up and go to these fields and do the works, infrared, UV, photo, soil samples, magnetometer, and get it all tested. We meet back at Dr. Morgan’s office at 5:00.” The class rushed off to their appointed tasks, chattering about how cool it was to get some field experience. Later, in Dr. Morgan’s office. “Anybody pick up anything.” “Uh, David, wasn’t that first field the site of that big rave?” “Yes.” “We didn’t see a single sign of people. There should have been something there, at least a water bottle or glowstick.” “Right, where did it all go?” “Crap my friend was at that rave.” David spoke up. “Bill, I think you should get a video camera on that.” And in other news: Marta picked up Saquina at the hospital, and John ran into Crazy Mental Patient Leopold at the Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane. [/QUOTE]
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