Reply to thread

Message

<blockquote data-quote="Cleon" data-source="post: 5790849" data-attributes="member: 57383">Hmm, I think that first paragraph needs a bit of work.What do you think of:Jarbos are desert-dwelling nocturnal rodents that travel in migratory&nbsp; flocks in search of water. They have a clairvoyant sense that allows them to &quot;smell&quot; water from many miles away, even if it is buried in a dry stream bed or the foot of a cliff. Upon arriving at a water source, a jarbo flock sets up a colony by digging two dozen or more burrows. Each burrow is a long, winding tunnel a foot wide, easily enough for the flexible jarbo to squeeze through, which ends in a nest 3&nbsp; feet in diameter. After a few nights or weeks, predators usually locate the colony, forcing the jarbos to move on with the next moonrise. Thus they keep ahead of those who would eat them.&nbsp;Jarbos feed on seeds, grass, and insects. They can survive on very&nbsp; little water (just a few tablespoons of per day), and their ability to&nbsp; sense water helps them locate concentrations of edible vegetation and&nbsp; insects clustered around water sources.Jarbo pelts are sometimes used as decorations on ceremonial garb or furniture, fetching up to 1 gp in the right markets.&nbsp;A typical jarbo is 2 feet long (including 9 inches of tail) and weighs 2&nbsp; to 4 pounds.&nbsp; Jarbo subspecies differ in ear size, number of toes, and&nbsp; the presence or absence of fur on the tail.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Cleon, post: 5790849, member: 57383"] Hmm, I think that first paragraph needs a bit of work. What do you think of: Jarbos are desert-dwelling nocturnal rodents that travel in migratory flocks in search of water. They have a clairvoyant sense that allows them to "smell" water from many miles away, even if it is buried in a dry stream bed or the foot of a cliff. Upon arriving at a water source, a jarbo flock sets up a colony by digging two dozen or more burrows. Each burrow is a long, winding tunnel a foot wide, easily enough for the flexible jarbo to squeeze through, which ends in a nest 3 feet in diameter. After a few nights or weeks, predators usually locate the colony, forcing the jarbos to move on with the next moonrise. Thus they keep ahead of those who would eat them. Jarbos feed on seeds, grass, and insects. They can survive on very little water (just a few tablespoons of per day), and their ability to sense water helps them locate concentrations of edible vegetation and insects clustered around water sources. Jarbo pelts are sometimes used as decorations on ceremonial garb or furniture, fetching up to 1 gp in the right markets. A typical jarbo is 2 feet long (including 9 inches of tail) and weighs 2 to 4 pounds. Jarbo subspecies differ in ear size, number of toes, and the presence or absence of fur on the tail. [/QUOTE]

Verification