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D&D Movie Plot Revealed
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<blockquote data-quote="schnee" data-source="post: 7181254" data-attributes="member: 16728"><p>If they don't pull an AD&D stunt like 'trick the Hill Giant to squeeze himself into a narrow passageway then cast Enlarge so his remains shoot out like a tube toothpaste filled with beef stew' then I'm asking for my money back.</p><p></p><p>If it doesn't feature a Druid turning into a female Brown Bear in heat to lure an angry male Brown Bear out of the cavern so they can go in and loot bodies I'll be furious.</p><p></p><p>If they don't include a scene that has the party arguing over a) who draws the map, b) who keeps track of the burned-out torches, and c) why 'we have to have the damn torches at all because 5 of the 6 members have Darkvision but oh, no, the human Paladin just had to stick along so we can't even steal stuff in his presence' I'll be disappointed.</p><p></p><p>D&D is all about clever methods of murder, crazy stunts, and petty arguments. Not drama. Not emotion. Not heroism. It's about weird murderhobo shenanigans.</p><p></p><p>I don't see the movie succeeding unless they take my advice. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite6" alt=":cool:" title="Cool :cool:" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":cool:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="schnee, post: 7181254, member: 16728"] If they don't pull an AD&D stunt like 'trick the Hill Giant to squeeze himself into a narrow passageway then cast Enlarge so his remains shoot out like a tube toothpaste filled with beef stew' then I'm asking for my money back. If it doesn't feature a Druid turning into a female Brown Bear in heat to lure an angry male Brown Bear out of the cavern so they can go in and loot bodies I'll be furious. If they don't include a scene that has the party arguing over a) who draws the map, b) who keeps track of the burned-out torches, and c) why 'we have to have the damn torches at all because 5 of the 6 members have Darkvision but oh, no, the human Paladin just had to stick along so we can't even steal stuff in his presence' I'll be disappointed. D&D is all about clever methods of murder, crazy stunts, and petty arguments. Not drama. Not emotion. Not heroism. It's about weird murderhobo shenanigans. I don't see the movie succeeding unless they take my advice. :cool: [/QUOTE]
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