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D&D promoting gang activity in prisons?
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<blockquote data-quote="CuRoi" data-source="post: 5444034" data-attributes="member: 98032"><p>About time I get some street cred as a Dungeon Master. </p><p> </p><p>Listen up, I'm the new boss on the cell block. You want to stay alive - you come to me. They call me DM, but you new guys can just call me "Master". Let me lay it out for you so you can maybe do your time here peacefully without me sticking this sharp, pointy d4 somewhere uncomfortable.</p><p> </p><p>1) 5 cigs x level to advance. I don't smoke, but believe me I know plenty in here that do. I'll trade these for the occassional Mountain Dew or sometimes save 'em up to trade for the latest splat book from WotC. I got a connection you see - Fat Tony is doin' life for knockin over a game shop and making the owner "disappear". They caught him but they ain't never found his stash.</p><p> </p><p>2) You play an elf or a pixie, that's your problem. DONT come runnin to me when your cellie takes a liking to your..."character".</p><p> </p><p>3) Playin "the game" as we call it isn't allowed by "the man". You get caught, I don't know you. If you rat me out, your PC won't just die - he'll wake up with a severed griffon's head in his bed and then I'll drop him in a forcecage with a Rust Monster. Next I'm droppin in a Disenchanter. Next, I'm stuffing the cage full of Shadows, then Wights and finally, I'll give your PC a ring of regeneration, drop in a Gelatinous Cube and Rule Zero that he fails the paralyze save. </p><p> </p><p>4) Keep the tube your dice came in. It helps when during searches due to rule #3. If I gotta explain, you aren't cut out for this.</p><p> </p><p>5) No Rules Lawyering. Most of the guys you see in here, last person they saw was their lawyer. Naturally this was right about the time the lawyer said he'd try to help them and right before they got 20 to life. You rules lawyer, someone's gonna feed you some dice.</p><p> </p><p>Anyone got anymore advice for the new guys before they go rollin' up a character?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CuRoi, post: 5444034, member: 98032"] About time I get some street cred as a Dungeon Master. Listen up, I'm the new boss on the cell block. You want to stay alive - you come to me. They call me DM, but you new guys can just call me "Master". Let me lay it out for you so you can maybe do your time here peacefully without me sticking this sharp, pointy d4 somewhere uncomfortable. 1) 5 cigs x level to advance. I don't smoke, but believe me I know plenty in here that do. I'll trade these for the occassional Mountain Dew or sometimes save 'em up to trade for the latest splat book from WotC. I got a connection you see - Fat Tony is doin' life for knockin over a game shop and making the owner "disappear". They caught him but they ain't never found his stash. 2) You play an elf or a pixie, that's your problem. DONT come runnin to me when your cellie takes a liking to your..."character". 3) Playin "the game" as we call it isn't allowed by "the man". You get caught, I don't know you. If you rat me out, your PC won't just die - he'll wake up with a severed griffon's head in his bed and then I'll drop him in a forcecage with a Rust Monster. Next I'm droppin in a Disenchanter. Next, I'm stuffing the cage full of Shadows, then Wights and finally, I'll give your PC a ring of regeneration, drop in a Gelatinous Cube and Rule Zero that he fails the paralyze save. 4) Keep the tube your dice came in. It helps when during searches due to rule #3. If I gotta explain, you aren't cut out for this. 5) No Rules Lawyering. Most of the guys you see in here, last person they saw was their lawyer. Naturally this was right about the time the lawyer said he'd try to help them and right before they got 20 to life. You rules lawyer, someone's gonna feed you some dice. Anyone got anymore advice for the new guys before they go rollin' up a character? [/QUOTE]
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