D20 Future Android Jokes

[Kae'Yoss]

You know I hang around some movie stars? Yeah! That C3PO is actually a nice fella off the set, but R2D2 is just tiring. The conversations would all go like this:

R2: Beep beep dip dip beep trill Beep bap
Me: No, I don't think the trashcan liked you!

My cousin is into scrap metal - What a deal: Get rid of your in-laws and make a fast buck at the same time. He's realla a made robot, but aren't we all?


Now, that's a huge proposal, I'll have to think long and hard about it okay I'll do it. What? It's not my fault that your brain works so slowly.


Oooh, the crowd's nasty today, I just hope that some robot doesn't kill all humans!

 

[Romers]

Some cool ideas. Some of the Futurama ones are funny but heavily contextualized, which when told become funny because only robots would get the humour.

Robot: Two Robots are sitting at a bus stop with a human, the bus comes and the human gets on.
Human: I dont get it.
Robots: Robots dont get tired legs and dont need to sit.
Human: So they're using up seats?
Robots: See, now you get the joke!

The robot see's the humour in robots programmed to sit at bus stops or to use bus stop seats, but the human (unless they program the robots) has no sense of what makes it funny. And really its not that funny at all but the idea is that to the robot it is funny.

The skills write-up for Robots in D20 Future sort of means that the robot is trained in comedy by a standup anyway so really it could be doing Seinfeld but then thats not funny without Kramer.

 

[Nifft]

"Chill out, you'll think faster." (works if crowd is loud or quiet)

- - -

"Exit? I barely even met it!"

Cheers, -- N

 

[Kae'Yoss]

The robot see's the humour

..only when he's programmed to

Like Data in Generations, when he got the emotion chip and suddenly started to laugh at a joke Riker told him years ago.

The skills write-up for Robots in D20 Future sort of means that the robot is trained in comedy by a standup anyway so really it could be doing Seinfeld but then thats not funny without Kramer.

I don't know, his stand-up material isn't bad. Of course, Michael Richards greatly enriches it. Maybe get a henchman with wonky programming.

"You're not a robot. You're a Pod. Sometimes, we Robots react to things in certain ways. You wouldn't understand"
"Because I'm a Pod."

 

[Kae'Yoss]

"Have you noticed? Fembots' preferences for Manbots really are influenced by their maintenance circle.

Recent debuggings have shown that during the internal analyses, they prefer rugged manbots built for heavy labour, but during their oil change, they prefer manbots to be hacked apart with big axes, doused in gasoline, set alight, and tortured with heavy magnets!

 

[thedungeondelver]

Anyone here remeber EPIC MAGAZINE, published by Marvel in the mid 70's to late 80's? It was their answer to HEAVY METAL. Anyway, there was a great one-shot strip that showed a robot floating in space. He's talking about the fact that he's an entertainment-bot with millions of jokes and songs preloaded in to him, that he has superconductive electromagnetic tap shoes so he can entertain in zero gravity and so forth - but he laments that despite all of this knowledge, skill and processing power he can't create.

Until "just last night". He managed to create his own joke, and he hit the captain of the ship he was assigned to in the face with a yeasty cream pie, all of his own accord. The captain then threw him out of an airlock.

He drifts further backwards for a couple of panels in silence, and then the last one shows him as a mere speck floating in the blackness. At the final panel he says "Hell...I thought it was funny."

 

[Warren Okuma]

R2: Beep beep dip dip beep trill Beep bap
ComedyBot: Now that's trash talk!