Upgrade your account to a Community Supporter account and remove most of the site ads.
Enchanted Trinkets Complete--a hardcover book containing over 500 magic items for your D&D games!

Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="Rel" data-source="post: 2041376" data-attributes="member: 99">I think the practical application of this theory depends heavily on the situation if not the people.  If you are meeting somebody in a bar or club then there is no "larger context" for the relationship.  You are probably going to sink or swim on your first impression.  But if there is a reason for ongoing contact with a person then there exists an opportunity for impressions to change and I believe they can.Let me give an example:I used to work at a fairly small company with about 8 people in it.  One of them was a young woman who I found very physically attractive (I was not looking for a date as I was and am happily married.  That doesn't mean that I don't find occasion to think about whether a woman is attractive or not.).  A few months after I went to work there we hired a secretary who I thought was sort of cute.The trick was that the stunning woman was also rather controlling, selfish and nasty at times.  The secretary was one of the most kind and warm people I've ever met.  Six months later if you'd asked me who was more attractive I would have unequivocally said the secretary.  And this wasn't a "well, if you consider the total package" kind of perspective.  When I looked at the secretary I found her to be much more physically attractive because I knew what a warm, kind, fun person she was.  Just the opposite was true of the other woman.Just to add another wrinkle to that situation, the "stunning woman" had a change of heart later on.  She apologized to me and others for how she had treated us in the past and although she remains a "Type A personality" she is no longer the bitchy control freak that she once was.  And I now find her more physically attractive than I ever did since shortly after I met her (although I don't really see her much anymore since neither of us work for that company any longer).Had I met these two women in a bar (let's assume that I'm single and looking for a date) then I would probably have paid more attention to the "stunning" one.  But there is no doubt in my mind that I would have been far better off to approach the somewhat cute but totally wonderful secretary.</blockquote>

Verification