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Message: <blockquote data-quote="vandaexpress" data-source="post: 6639294" data-attributes="member: 6790472">So... OP, I could be wrong. And it's probably rude of me to even bring it up, but this sounds like so many situations that I ran into in the past with old groups. So I'm just gonna level...I get the impression that this whole thing is really about the girl. Maybe it's not completely about her, but it sounds like she's a pretty vital lynchpin in the drama, or her opinion of people.There is so much emotional toxicity in this situation, there are people talking so much smack behind other people's backs and its coming back to bite them, romance, meltdowns. It's like Waterdeep 90210. This has absolutely nothing to do with OP's DMing style and everything to do with emotional friction from a player that doesn't like OP and is undermining his games, a situation which has been exacerbated by OP's "friend" sharing his negative opinions with the problem player.There's a lot of blame and social flubs going around here with multiple people, and its going together about as well as gasoline and fire.The guy has issues, but if I were to find out that someone told my girlfriend that I'm stupid, you better believe I would have a grudge against that guy. Especially if my girlfriend was taking his side in arguments. I'd be like why are you supporting him, huh? I could even see some people taking that grudge to the extreme and trying to portray that guy as an incompetent DM. "He's the real idiot! I'll show him!" etc. This doesn't seem like a DM style thing at all, it seems like a contest of pride between two important men in this girl's life.This is one reason why I have a 'draconian' preference my players not date each other and I, as a DM, definitely do not date my players any more or play with anyone that I have that kind of emotional connection with. It goes sideways too easily and next thing you know, you have two girls at eachothers throat about whether or not to cast moonbeam - it has nothing to do with the spell, and everything to do with their personal drama with each other. One of the earlier posts talked about a DM that didn't care about his players or whatever, I think it's healthy to keep an emotional distance in some cases from the players to avoid these kinds of situations, though.Get out of there, OP. Get a new group of friends. Break contact with the old ones. Dude seems abusive. Girl seems to be exacerbating his issues. They aren't interested in fixing this. An apology is not forthcoming. Just move on.</blockquote>

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