Desert wyrm - request for comments

[CCamfield]

This is actually an adaptation of a monster in Interludes: Sands of Pain, to Iron Heroes. (The only part of that that matters, though, is the way the entry specifies Active and Passive defense.)

I found a lot of problems with the writeup in the book as I was typing it up, so I took a crack at fixing things myself. (Stuff like: No feats. No skills. Incorrect breath weapon DCs. Ancient level creatures getting Sorcerer spells, but with only a 10 Cha. etc)

So... how does this look?

http://www3.sympatico.ca/ccamfield/games/fate/bestiary.html

 

[RavinRay]

First of all, I don't have Interludes: Sands of Pain, to Iron Heroes, so there's no background for me to compare with.

At first look at the title I thought it would be similar to the desert lyndwyrm from Draconomicon, but you've got a lesser dragon with 9 age categories, between the 6 for the wurms in Dragon and the 12 for true dragons. So does that actually make it closer in relationship to true dragons, despite its rather low intelligence?

Speaking of Int, it actually starts out with animal-level, non-sentient intelligence and then ends up a sentient creature? It sounds like it was awakened as an adult. That's unprecedented for any dragon; even the yu lung, the "larval" form of lung dragons, is already sentient.

A desert wyrm's tail ends in a flat, forked bone plate.

Would be good to give it a tail slap attack in this case. If the forks are pointed they might deal slashing damage. Does it resemble the fang dragon's tail?

That's as far as my first comments go; I'd like to add more (like fly speeds and increasing Dex), I'll come back later...