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<blockquote data-quote="Warpiglet-7" data-source="post: 8161411" data-attributes="member: 7025282"><p>We do something really crazy. We discuss what we would like to do and the DM tries to incorporate some of our preferences. But then he rolls with it. We give some very general ideas and then unleash him.</p><p></p><p>he could tell people were tiring of a series of desert temple complexes. We were pushing level 8. He gave us a damn survey! You could say you wanted wilderness, urban, other dungeon and so forth.</p><p></p><p>but problem with DM authority does not come up really. We are friends and take turns DMing over the years. What we might do given our 40 years of friendship is mildly gripe... then lay off.</p><p></p><p>but if the DM says something has occurred the last thing we do is vote about it. We suck it up and talk about it after the game or just suck it up.</p><p></p><p>things don’t always go your way in a dangerous realm. I think mostly we roll with it. We are adults. Getting your exact way has become less of a thing since we are now in our 40s. Group fun is more important than my fun in each moment. Sometimes it’s my turn...my specific preference and sometimes it’s yours.</p><p></p><p>overall though we listen to the dm. You don’t shut the game down by having a fit. We did that when we started out occasionally at 10 or 11. Later we occasionally told the DM we thought he had given us too many magic items!</p><p></p><p>the whole thing is a joint enterprise but the DM is the leader and we count on whomever that is at the time to make calls. We might try to influence some maybe a grumble a little but ultimately defer. If I don’t like it now, a few hundred more yards and a short rest later and the situation can be exactly to my liking.</p><p></p><p>but DM is in charge because we elected him. We the players! We can throw him out of his seat but we are not rewriting g the constitution. The next person to sit at the head of the table in turn is in charge as well.</p><p></p><p>I realize that playing at stores or with strangers is different. But being a visitor with a passport means you can travel! There are advantages. The relationships might not be as tight to start but there is more freedom too.</p><p></p><p>for me the solution is not to make every decision a majority rules thing or to rewrite the long held rules and assumptions of the game. It’s to engage in dialogue or to walk if the coat is not high to do so. But I don’t want to tear down the DM or his tools.</p><p></p><p>I want something outside of myself to strive against. The DM as a separate decision making entity kindly provides a sense of unknown and breathes life into adversaries. I don’t need to know everything he does; I don’t WANT to.</p><p></p><p>nor do I feel a need to resent his authority! When I go to the doctor I pay them and trust them to make decisions. When I play D&D, I empower the DM to set the stage for fun. I then interact and make use of that opportunity. He is not going to bat 1.00! But with some trust the overall is generally very fun.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Warpiglet-7, post: 8161411, member: 7025282"] We do something really crazy. We discuss what we would like to do and the DM tries to incorporate some of our preferences. But then he rolls with it. We give some very general ideas and then unleash him. he could tell people were tiring of a series of desert temple complexes. We were pushing level 8. He gave us a damn survey! You could say you wanted wilderness, urban, other dungeon and so forth. but problem with DM authority does not come up really. We are friends and take turns DMing over the years. What we might do given our 40 years of friendship is mildly gripe... then lay off. but if the DM says something has occurred the last thing we do is vote about it. We suck it up and talk about it after the game or just suck it up. things don’t always go your way in a dangerous realm. I think mostly we roll with it. We are adults. Getting your exact way has become less of a thing since we are now in our 40s. Group fun is more important than my fun in each moment. Sometimes it’s my turn...my specific preference and sometimes it’s yours. overall though we listen to the dm. You don’t shut the game down by having a fit. We did that when we started out occasionally at 10 or 11. Later we occasionally told the DM we thought he had given us too many magic items! the whole thing is a joint enterprise but the DM is the leader and we count on whomever that is at the time to make calls. We might try to influence some maybe a grumble a little but ultimately defer. If I don’t like it now, a few hundred more yards and a short rest later and the situation can be exactly to my liking. but DM is in charge because we elected him. We the players! We can throw him out of his seat but we are not rewriting g the constitution. The next person to sit at the head of the table in turn is in charge as well. I realize that playing at stores or with strangers is different. But being a visitor with a passport means you can travel! There are advantages. The relationships might not be as tight to start but there is more freedom too. for me the solution is not to make every decision a majority rules thing or to rewrite the long held rules and assumptions of the game. It’s to engage in dialogue or to walk if the coat is not high to do so. But I don’t want to tear down the DM or his tools. I want something outside of myself to strive against. The DM as a separate decision making entity kindly provides a sense of unknown and breathes life into adversaries. I don’t need to know everything he does; I don’t WANT to. nor do I feel a need to resent his authority! When I go to the doctor I pay them and trust them to make decisions. When I play D&D, I empower the DM to set the stage for fun. I then interact and make use of that opportunity. He is not going to bat 1.00! But with some trust the overall is generally very fun. [/QUOTE]
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