DM's favorite- how to avoid?
- Thread starter SRD
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darthkilmor
First Post
SRD said:
If you're a player? Totally kill the "favorite" player's character. That'll teach'm.
Seriously, this is more of a personal relationship-type problem, there's no rules I know of for "playing nice and fair", you'll probably have better answers for dealing with conflict like this in the General Discussion forum.
but this answer makes me ask another question (seriously): 
Infiniti2000
First Post
There are major repercussions, like going to jail for premeditated murder. Of course, you probably meant to say "another player's character." 
Any such consequences are entirely within the purview of the DM. Yeah, in your case that would be a little like the fox watching the henhouse. I suggest just discussing it openly with the DM. It'll be particularly difficult if the favoritism is towards someone the DM is dating (or married to), but hopefully he or she will be mature enough to respond favorably to your criticism. Best o' luck to ya!
Any such consequences are entirely within the purview of the DM. Yeah, in your case that would be a little like the fox watching the henhouse. I suggest just discussing it openly with the DM. It'll be particularly difficult if the favoritism is towards someone the DM is dating (or married to), but hopefully he or she will be mature enough to respond favorably to your criticism. Best o' luck to ya!
I think first you have to ask yourself why the DM favors that character and hates another. Is it because of friendships/favortisms that happen outside the game, or is it because he likes the character design or personality of the character in question? Are the players he hates being uncooperative with the direction he's taking his campaign or rulings he makes at the table?
It is always possible to kill another player character. But I would have strong reservations about doing so unless the DM's special treatment of them is based on things that happen over the board. Turnabout is fair play, and if the DM can treat them with favor because of things outside the game, you can do the opposite.
If the reason for their favor is a cool character design or great RPing, then the players who get hated on need to examine their own play. It could be that story lines are based around this one player because he's the only one who has interesting goals he wants to accomplish or a vibrant history rich with plot.
The most subtle and enduring way you can win the DM over in this situation is to make a character that THEY'RE interested in, so much so that they almost forget about that other character. Involve your backstory in their world to the point that you're an integral part of their campaign. Be cooperative and subtle in upstaging the favorite character and eventually the DM can't help but throw you a bone.
This last option does with finesse what killing the player does with a sledge hammer. Murdering a PC only feeds the DM's fire and causes a lot of drama, so I'd avoid that wholeheartedly were I you.
Hope this helps,
Krensus
It is always possible to kill another player character. But I would have strong reservations about doing so unless the DM's special treatment of them is based on things that happen over the board. Turnabout is fair play, and if the DM can treat them with favor because of things outside the game, you can do the opposite.
If the reason for their favor is a cool character design or great RPing, then the players who get hated on need to examine their own play. It could be that story lines are based around this one player because he's the only one who has interesting goals he wants to accomplish or a vibrant history rich with plot.
The most subtle and enduring way you can win the DM over in this situation is to make a character that THEY'RE interested in, so much so that they almost forget about that other character. Involve your backstory in their world to the point that you're an integral part of their campaign. Be cooperative and subtle in upstaging the favorite character and eventually the DM can't help but throw you a bone.
This last option does with finesse what killing the player does with a sledge hammer. Murdering a PC only feeds the DM's fire and causes a lot of drama, so I'd avoid that wholeheartedly were I you.
Hope this helps,
Krensus
IamTheTest
First Post
A great deal of DnD is built on trust. Because there is no prescribed goal for the game (on a whole scale not just a personal game basis), the game progresses as long as the players play. Many players dont enjoy playing when their PCs die at the hands of those who were supposed to be on their side. This is just my experience, your game may vary.
DMG II chapter 1 gives the DM advice on how to run a game, including "knowing your players".
DMG chapter 1 - 3 gives advice for how to do things too.
Note that xp is awarded for a "party" - there is not supposed to be "solo kills", like there was in 2nd ed. So in general xp for defeating a foe should not be awarded for killing another player's character. (DMG pg 36 gives the formula for awarding xp per character and creature/trap overcome.)
DMG chapter 1 - 3 gives advice for how to do things too.
Note that xp is awarded for a "party" - there is not supposed to be "solo kills", like there was in 2nd ed. So in general xp for defeating a foe should not be awarded for killing another player's character. (DMG pg 36 gives the formula for awarding xp per character and creature/trap overcome.)
frankthedm
First Post
Honesty MIGHT work. Don't come off as angry though.
1. Gather information.
How appropriate is it for you to just leave? Are there many gaming groups, and you just started with this one? Or is this a close group of your friends that have been together since grade school, and you really do not know any other gaming groups in town?
2. Develop a Best Alternative to Negotiated Agreement.
Your bargaining position is going to be better the less you have a vested interest in the outcome. This works throughout life. Want a raise at work? Working hard won't work -- that shows your boss that you'll put out at the salary he's giving you. Getting a better job offer from somewhere else *will* work. If your boss doesn't give you the raise, he loses you.
In this case, you need to find an alternative that is a viable threat. By "threat," I do not mean angry denunciations or physical intimidation. I mean you need to be able to say to your GM "Listen, this stops, or else X happens." X may be "I leave and join the other group across the hall," or X may be "The other players and I are going to start a different game. You're welcome to play if you want to, but not DM."
3. Negotiate from strength.
Now that you have your alternative, you need to outline what you need. Do it calmly and without accusation. Use "me" words -- don't talk about what the DM is doing, talk about how it makes you feel.
The conversation might go:
"I've noticed that, in the game, everything Player A does turns out great, and everything Player B does is blocked. That makes me feel like players are getting different treatment. I feel like the game is becoming unbalanced because of this. Since I feel this way, I am going to leave / start a new game / take up crocheting, unless this changes."
4. Avoid doing this:
a. Killing the "favorite's" character. This won't work. First, the DM will find a way to stop you. Remember, the DM is god, and this is his pet character. You'll just piss off the "favorite," the DM, and the rest of the party.
b. Getting angry or personal. Telling the DM "You suck because so-and-so is your pet" will just make him defensive and unlikely to change.
c. Not following up. The DM will do two things when you talk to him. He'll deny it's a problem, or he'll promise to change.
If he denies it's a problem, follow up with your alternative. Walk out of the game, and find another one that is better. If he promises to fix it, and doesn't, tell him "Hey, this is what I was talking about. Fix it, or I walk." Then walk.
Good luck!
Carpe
How appropriate is it for you to just leave? Are there many gaming groups, and you just started with this one? Or is this a close group of your friends that have been together since grade school, and you really do not know any other gaming groups in town?
2. Develop a Best Alternative to Negotiated Agreement.
Your bargaining position is going to be better the less you have a vested interest in the outcome. This works throughout life. Want a raise at work? Working hard won't work -- that shows your boss that you'll put out at the salary he's giving you. Getting a better job offer from somewhere else *will* work. If your boss doesn't give you the raise, he loses you.
In this case, you need to find an alternative that is a viable threat. By "threat," I do not mean angry denunciations or physical intimidation. I mean you need to be able to say to your GM "Listen, this stops, or else X happens." X may be "I leave and join the other group across the hall," or X may be "The other players and I are going to start a different game. You're welcome to play if you want to, but not DM."
3. Negotiate from strength.
Now that you have your alternative, you need to outline what you need. Do it calmly and without accusation. Use "me" words -- don't talk about what the DM is doing, talk about how it makes you feel.
The conversation might go:
"I've noticed that, in the game, everything Player A does turns out great, and everything Player B does is blocked. That makes me feel like players are getting different treatment. I feel like the game is becoming unbalanced because of this. Since I feel this way, I am going to leave / start a new game / take up crocheting, unless this changes."
4. Avoid doing this:
a. Killing the "favorite's" character. This won't work. First, the DM will find a way to stop you. Remember, the DM is god, and this is his pet character. You'll just piss off the "favorite," the DM, and the rest of the party.
b. Getting angry or personal. Telling the DM "You suck because so-and-so is your pet" will just make him defensive and unlikely to change.
c. Not following up. The DM will do two things when you talk to him. He'll deny it's a problem, or he'll promise to change.
If he denies it's a problem, follow up with your alternative. Walk out of the game, and find another one that is better. If he promises to fix it, and doesn't, tell him "Hey, this is what I was talking about. Fix it, or I walk." Then walk.
Good luck!
Carpe
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