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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Zerith" data-source="post: 5876955" data-attributes="member: 99953">Presently we have 3 melee focused characters, one Cerlic who is extra  good at destroying undead and the before mentioned two arcane casters  I've read your character background and I consider myself a veteran RPer(note, I don't think I've been living up to my own standard for the last few years),  but not a vet D&Der.It reads like an intro post instead of a bio. that's not good. Anyways, all the PCs thus far are fairly powerful, being ECL 9, so it  would be nice if there was a reason for her being so, at level 9 any of  them are able to crush rank and file mages muchness rank and file  soldiers and likely an entire village single handed: even in their youth  most of our characters went of the kind to be pushed around unless they  allowed it or there was something notable in their surroundings, that  would likely be noted in their bios ;3  Anyways, I'll summarize your bio: Sable is at an inn: the weather caused her to flee fer travels until it had cleared.She is pestered by an inn keeperShe vaguely recalls her past.-she likes, or liked, the blacksmith's son-her Father gives a warning, she laughs in his face and he gets anger by  her literally shrugging it off, he slapped some sense into her.-her father screamed, likely as she overreacted and smote him down with innate power.Then her Raven stirs her from her remembrance and she leaves in the middle of the night despite the inn keepers worry.This is not a background, this is one dairy entry.Backgrounds generally don't go into so many nuances because they need to  deal with the character from the start of their first interesting  experience to their most present of note. as such most are more  contracted.For example.-we're presently in a dangerous area heading towards what might as well  be the gate to hell: why is she either in the army or in this area? this  question, the most important, is ignored wholly.-this character is, by over view with a presents knowledge, a witch:  someone to burn at the stake. Did they chase her out as a mob? did she  flee before this? this is ignored and would give great insight into her  mind set, is she quick to flee danger? did she instead flee prolonged  contact with others to avoid doing unto them as she did to her father?  did she only leave her home when her option was to flee or die? this  would tell us about her mindset and is a key part of her past.-during her travels since then has anything important happen? perhaps  she was told the valley had the means to undo her indiscretions? that  she could do something there so that she could return home in peace?  there.-did she apprentice under anyone, or thing?-did she have any other interesting interactions?-what happen chance gave her her affinity for shadow and/or magic?I'll stop here for now, but while I think the bio is under whelming as a  bio, its a very good show of what you can post and I look  forwards to seeing more of your work. I just think the Bio is too verbose  for how much is conveyed and that what precious little is told is not  too important.</blockquote>

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