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<blockquote data-quote="Scupper" data-source="post: 531192" data-attributes="member: 2593">No One Enjoys the D&amp;D Film, as a RuleNo One Enjoys the D&amp;D Film (as a Rule)&quot;Young man,&quot; said the clerk, &quot;you're sort of a fool.No one enjoys the D&amp;D film, as a rule.The film is quite poor, and you might as well know it,Where people keep trash is the place that they throw it.&quot;&quot;You could rent other bad films (like Beastmaster or Krull)But you'd be hard-pressed to find one as stupid and dull!So trust an employee of the month at this store:You’ll find that this film is much worse than a bore.&quot;Then Marco the gamer said, &quot;It may be you’re right.A good review of this film is nowhere in sight.It might be no good, but then again, well, it MIGHT.'Cause you never can tell just by what people say.This could be a rental that will brighten my day!&quot;&quot;Perhaps, despite warnings from countless ENWorlders,The film isn’t as bad as being devoured by Beholders.Or less pleasant, in fact, than a bout of ebola,Or a Rust Monster munching your Toyota Corolla.&quot;&quot;Lamer than a player who always runs late?Worse than a Night Hag on a blind date?Or Thanksgiving dinner with Ankheg on your plate?Surely the film can’t that badly rate!&quot;&quot;Worse than skinny dipping in Sahaugin-filled water?Or having a Kobold engaged to your daughter?More unpleasant, by far, than Troll armpit stink?(Such comments, I’ll admit, do make me think.)&quot;&quot;Harder to watch than a basilisk’s gaze?Worse for your health than a beholder’s rays?And it can’t be as bad as green slime in your shorts.(As Morrus and company often reports.)&quot;&quot;Why, it could contain monsters that I've only seenIn the Monster Manual’s pages or Dragon Magazine!Foul monsters of temper both vile and unpleasant,Who, if not stopped by PCs, would devour every peasant!&quot;&quot;A great big giant, whether fire, hill, or stone!Why, it’d be worth a rental on that basis alone!Or an evil Mind Flayer, with tentacles a-plenty,Might slaughter a fighter (or perhaps even twenty)!&quot;&quot;A Displacer Beast might make an appearance,Foiling the heroes by illusory not-here-ence!A Slaad or two, either red, green, or black!Or perhaps an undead legion will attack!”&quot;Gray Ooze, Black Pudding, Or perhaps Ochre Jelly,An Otyugh (not at all nice, and quite smelly),Or perhaps an army of Dark Elf assassins!Or Quasits and Demons of all types and fashions!”&quot;Hydras and Hobgoblins!&nbsp; Harpies and Howlers!Nixies and Nagas! Nightmares, Nightcrawlers!Duergars, Driders, and various Devils,Dungeon encounters of challenging levels!&quot;&quot;So I think I will rent it. Yes, that’s what I’ll do.And watch it myself, if it’s alright with you.Because you can't always trust other people’s opinion,&quot;Said Marco the gamer to the Blockbuster minion.&quot;That might be true,&quot; said the minion, &quot;If such things were inside it.But you’ll find that this film didn’t use D&amp;D to guide it.So I’ll take your four-fifty, but you’re sort of a fool.No one enjoys the D&amp;D film (as a rule).&quot;</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Scupper, post: 531192, member: 2593"] [b]No One Enjoys the D&D Film, as a Rule[/b] [B]No One Enjoys the D&D Film (as a Rule)[/B] "Young man," said the clerk, "you're sort of a fool. No one enjoys the D&D film, as a rule. The film is quite poor, and you might as well know it, Where people keep trash is the place that they throw it." "You could rent other bad films (like Beastmaster or Krull) But you'd be hard-pressed to find one as stupid and dull! So trust an employee of the month at this store: You’ll find that this film is much worse than a bore." Then Marco the gamer said, "It may be you’re right. A good review of this film is nowhere in sight. It might be no good, but then again, well, it [I]MIGHT[/I]. 'Cause you never can tell just by what people say. This could be a rental that will brighten my day!" "Perhaps, despite warnings from countless ENWorlders, The film isn’t as bad as being devoured by Beholders. Or less pleasant, in fact, than a bout of ebola, Or a Rust Monster munching your Toyota Corolla." "Lamer than a player who always runs late? Worse than a Night Hag on a blind date? Or Thanksgiving dinner with Ankheg on your plate? Surely the film can’t that badly rate!" "Worse than skinny dipping in Sahaugin-filled water? Or having a Kobold engaged to your daughter? More unpleasant, by far, than Troll armpit stink? (Such comments, I’ll admit, do make me think.)" "Harder to watch than a basilisk’s gaze? Worse for your health than a beholder’s rays? And it can’t be as bad as green slime in your shorts. (As Morrus and company often reports.)" "Why, it could contain monsters that I've only seen In the Monster Manual’s pages or Dragon Magazine! Foul monsters of temper both vile and unpleasant, Who, if not stopped by PCs, would devour every peasant!" "A great big giant, whether fire, hill, or stone! Why, it’d be worth a rental on that basis alone! Or an evil Mind Flayer, with tentacles a-plenty, Might slaughter a fighter (or perhaps even twenty)!" "A Displacer Beast might make an appearance, Foiling the heroes by illusory not-here-ence! A Slaad or two, either red, green, or black! Or perhaps an undead legion will attack!” "Gray Ooze, Black Pudding, Or perhaps Ochre Jelly, An Otyugh (not at all nice, and quite smelly), Or perhaps an army of Dark Elf assassins! Or Quasits and Demons of all types and fashions!” "Hydras and Hobgoblins! Harpies and Howlers! Nixies and Nagas! Nightmares, Nightcrawlers! Duergars, Driders, and various Devils, Dungeon encounters of challenging levels!" "So I think I will rent it. Yes, that’s what I’ll do. And watch it myself, if it’s alright with you. Because you can't always trust other people’s opinion," Said Marco the gamer to the Blockbuster minion. "That might be true," said the minion, "If such things were inside it. But you’ll find that this film didn’t use D&D to guide it. So I’ll take your four-fifty, but you’re sort of a fool. No one enjoys the D&D film (as a rule)." [/QUOTE]

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