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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Outlanders" data-source="post: 598720" data-attributes="member: 9336">Howdy all...Ok, a few things I want to point out about the second adventure in the Dragonstar: Raw Recruits book. Mind you, I am being very nit-picky here, and I am also a professional writer, so things like I'm about to point out are what I consider to be glaring errors, despite the fact that many others may not have even noticed them. To the authors of the book, this is NOT an attack. Take it to mean exactly what it's supposed to mean, Constructive criticism. I want to talk about several things in the adventure. Now, maybe I missed something entirely, but I am under the assumption that the landing platforms are located on the OUTSIDE of the facility, where there is no atmosphere what so ever. If I missed the fact that the platforms are actually enclosed, then part of what I am going to say is invalid, as I am wrong. Now, assuming that I was right that the platforms are not enclosed, and are open to space, I have the following comments on it. About the description on page 56.  The description mentions a well weathered landing platform.  I have to point out here that weather cannot exist in space. You must have an atmosphere for weather. It would have been far better to say a well WORN landing platform.  At the same time, if the platforms are indeed enclosed, then they still wouldn't appear to be weathered, worn would be far better. Another description on page 57, regarding the ship laying smoking and wounded. Again, if the platforms are located outside in open space, this simply won't happen. Fire needs oxygen to burn, no oxygen, as in space, no fire. Also, I didn't notice anywhere in the description of the ship itself where there were fires. Any fire producing smoke that would manage to be sucked out into space would be extinguished quickly by the vaccum (sorry if I mispelled it, I rely too heavily on my spell checker).  Also, how would the pc's hear any sound in space, and how would anyone be able to paint on the side of the ship?Once again, if the landing pad is actually enclosed, then this would have worked. As I have stated several times already, if the landing pad is enclosed, then the PC's shouldn't have any trouble getting into the base. HOWEVER, if it's open to space, the PC's would be forced to don vacc suits in order to get into the station, thus eliminating the whole trap located in the decontamination chamber. Another problem, albeit a very minor problem, is where exactly is the water coming from that is leaking in the old caverns. Remember, this is an asteroid, not a planet, there shouldn't be any 'ground water' to seep through the rock like that. However, a couple of ways to get around this would be:  Mention leaking pipes instead, heating, ventillation, you name it, OR, possibly ice crystals inside the rock itself, melting due to the heat radiating out from the facility. Now, about the whole factory itself. It mentions that Daedelus couldn't be bothered to repair certain portions of the facility, such as the manipulator arms and lights. One thing that should have been considered is why would the Soulmech even bother keeping an atmosphere inside the factory, or keep it heated?  It would have made much more sense to have had the entire factory free of both. I know, it was done for the sake of the PC's.Also, I feel that it would have been a much more realistic facility if, when it was written, that a maintenance room should have been added, to repair the robots and the equipment, unless it could have been explained that the manufacturing plant could handle those responsiblities.  There should have been temporary crew quarters and a mess hall, after all, the base was at one time manned... although, once again, you could easily explain this by having the people who once crewed the station using their ships... And, on that point, there was no mention what so ever of the type of ship the two Ogres Rumble and Brawler arrived on. I don't know about other groups, but in the past, the groups I've played with would never leave anything like that behind. It should have been detailed.  And, if anyone checks, there is nothing mentioned of either ogre possessing piloting skills.This is what I suggest to 'fix' the whole docking situation. There should have been something in the description mentioning that it was indeed enclosed, either by a force field that would allow a ship to pass without harming the atmospheric integrity, or that there were huge blast doors. If the blast doors were used, then the landing pad would still be exposed to space for a short period of time, as the oxygen would have to be pumped out of the room to allow docking, and then, if needed, have the oxygen pumped back into it. Thus, the whole smoking wreckage would actually work. Simply put, that would require too much work, too much to be added to the adventure.  It would be far simpler to add a paragraph mentioning a force field or the like, keeping the landing pad pressurized. That's it for now. I hope that I haven't offended anyone, but things like this HAVE to be pointed out. All the best,Chris</blockquote>

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