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Rocket your D&D 5E and Level Up: Advanced 5E games into space! Alpha Star Magazine Is Launching... Right Now!

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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Hairy Minotaur" data-source="post: 1892660" data-attributes="member: 11574">ADVENTURERS WANTED!Feeling left out? Feeling like no one seems to understand you? Want to unleash the born arse-kicker in you? When people mention the word "reach" do you have to stretch, would you prefer not to? Then run, don't walk/slither/fly/pounce/blink/teleport to your nearest Gronar's Grifters recruiting station now! Just look at some of the benefits:1) We'll take anyone (even gnomes and warlocks)! If you can stay rolled in a tight ball while being thrown, or don't mind the constant threat of being eaten.2) We consistently have a profit margin of over 100%! Especially when we loot our own party members. 3) Take on some of the weirdest most indescribable beasts no one has ever seen before! If taxidermy is your thing, we'd really like you to give us a call!4) Witness first hand, the arcane might of El Grande Largo Gigantes Paquito (the hornied minotaur) and his bovine entourage, tremble under the kilt of an 20' tall giant (and get an answer to that age old question), Need to find faith? Convert under the tutelage of our resident healer Korg. Come see the only druid in 50 miles to turn down a skunk companion, and marvel at his pyromania! Check out the elf who thinks he's a storm giant, witness his awe inspiring "consistently at death's door" ability!5) More enlarge persons than you can shake a huge spear at.6) Want to know what Darkleaf armor is? How about a Greatbow? Collar of Venom? Inebriated giant? Come and find out.7) Take on challenging brain puzzles, such as "name the handsome giant in the picture."  We have bi-weekly meetings to discuss which enemy goes down next. There are currently 6 *crunch* oops, make that 5 members plus a pet rock. Still not convinced? Just read about some of our exploits: <a href="http://www.enworld.org/forums/showthread.php?t=101261" target="_blank">Don't laugh....... It's coming</a> And now, a few words from our spiritual leader: "Korg say if you not come help Korg find new temple to Umtala, then I tell Gronar to attack your table. That teach you lesson. Oh, and if you can read this, then tell Korg what it say. Korg not know how to read." If this sounds like your kind of fun, then contact me <a href="http://jeffries101@aol.com" target="_blank">here</a></blockquote>

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