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Message: <blockquote data-quote="merelycompetent" data-source="post: 2800159" data-attributes="member: 33830">For me and the group I play with, yes, it is common courtesy to bring supplies/snacks when we game. I do not expect this of people I'm trying out (to see if they're going to join my group) or who are trying me out (for the reverse).Over the last... er, too many years of DMing <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />, I've handed each player a copy of the house rules (what rules I've changed/clarified for the game I'm running) and the table rules (what the rules are for sitting at my table during the game). There have been only two times since I first wrote down those house & table rules that I didn't email, have a web page, or hand out a copy of them and *require* the players to read them before starting the campaign. Both games ended in disasters. I've sat at tables as a player and witnessed (and may well have unintentionally contributed to) such meltdowns.The basic problem, in my opinion, is that everyone (even long-time friends) comes to the table with different expectations. If no one tells anyone what is expected of someone- including the DM - then how is everyone supposed to know what will or will not offend?The best thing to do, I think, is to make it clear what is and is not acceptable before the group actually starts to play as a group. This way, everyone - Players and DM - know what is expected of them. Now, how to approach this can be a delicate subject. Some people may be justifiably offended if they are told that their manners are unacceptable, especially in front of the other players. That's one of the reasons I use a printed handout and a webpage. It's ten times as hard to implement something like this once play has been going on for a while. Everyone will tend to read a specific criticism directed at themselves and can understandably be upset that no one told them they had offended until now - when it has been dragged out in public view of the group. In my experience, if conflict has gotten to that point where members of your group are going to get upset at your politely, non-name-calling, not mentioning specific examples of past behavior, modestly-proposed table rules, then you're going to lose those members in the near future. You and they will probably be happier for it.</blockquote>

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