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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Wonka" data-source="post: 4390994" data-attributes="member: 62389">Ok, Ive tried 3 times now to type in a nice long response, and each time its been foiled by something stupid, so lets try this again shall we?First off, thank you for your reply, being a new DM i can use all the help and advice I can get for fleshing this out into something useable for others. This adventure was initially written to be pretty plain, and it was supposed to be run in 1 or 2 sessions to get introduced to the new ruleset of 4e. I actually ended up running this for a different group of friends who had never played D&D before. They enjoyed playing it and asked me to keep going, so here I am asking for help to shore up my adventure writing skills <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /> I think for the next part im going to modify the new adventure out of Dungeon (The Rescue at Rivenroar) but eventually I want to add some more homemade adventures to the mix to flesh out my story.I really like your ideas for fleshing out the begining of the story. They seem to be more immersive than just flinging goblins at the players in the begining. Ill probably add in your ideas when I do a second version of this.About the goblins. They work for Tellondris, but are ordered by him to serve Valdred for his plans. This is mentioned briefly in the Valdred background section, but its easy to overlook now that I look back. See, a lot of this stems from I know in my head things that I didnt realize I was leaving out of the background information. Ill go back and add a lot more to flesh that out. Also, I totally need to add zombie and skeleton goblins, I cannot believe I didnt think about that before. Ill either reflavor the existing MM entries or make my own <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />Valdred, honestly, was supposed to be a surprise. I really wanted them to go "umm wtf, theres a necromancer?" in order to leave them with a sort of cliff hanger and hook to keep playing once the adventure was over. Hes also suposed to be a small fry. He was supposed to die and his note would reveal Tellondris to the players, who is to be the real BBEG and their eventual goal. Although in the play test, my players decided to take him alive, totally didnt expect that from them lol. It led to a nice improvised session where Tellondris sent some goblin agents to "reaquire" valdred. But I digress. I had some more points in my original response, but my anger has made me forget what they were at this time <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /> Ill add them in when/if I remember them <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /> Thanks for your critque and suggestions <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /></blockquote>

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