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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Vraille Darkfang" data-source="post: 2215025" data-attributes="member: 16989">Many, many, many, just wrong things happend in the WoD game wher I palyed an Akashik Asian Mage named Ho Chi Minh (had an awakned baboon named Chairman Mao & girlfriend Marxetta, plus a Spider Monkey named Fidel & an army of Red Squirrels).  But that is way too, too, much insanity to even begin to list here.Just remember nothin' says lovin like a monkey with a Forces-empowered Chain gun.But the following tale of seriousness occured in Shadowrun.We're hired to steal something from a museum of modern art.  Go in, quiet like (I'm a troll with more implants than decades worth of playboys.  So, I open a locked door with a shotgun.  That's what I do.  Guards come out, bullets & blades start flying.Shaman decides to help by animating the largest, heaviest structure nearby.  That happens to be a 15' tall solid marble penis.See the GM had taken the plans for this art museum from a real world modern art museum.  Even had the major exibits labeled.  The area we were in had apparently had some artist who used phallic symbols to show who the US is aggressive, blah, blah, blah.  The important part is that the major exhibit in that section was a 15' tall, 9' diameter solid marble penis she carved to represent, well something.  The shaman used it to beat museum guards into pulp.Something about you last view in this life being a giant, glowing penis just seems wrong.  But anyway, he proceded to use his giant penis as a battering ram, and quickly mad enew doors so we could get to the painting we had to steal.Well, cops show up.  Too many to fight, even with a giant penis.  So we lead a fighting retreat to the roof, where something happens my troll refuses to acknowledge to this day.  We need to get away, trapped on the roof of a building completely surrounded.  We needed something that flew.  Shaman:  "Wait.  My Giant Penis flies!  Everybody mount up.  Umm, I mean get on."Me (Troll): "Sure we can't just kill them all"Street Sam Party Leader: "No we can't.  You heard em, everybody on the shaman's giant flying penis."So we all get on the giant flying penis and go sailing off into the night.  Cops got 3 copters, so it turns into a firefight.  Kind of hard to shoot straight when you got a giant penis between your legs.  We shoot one down.  Ram another with the Giant Penis (Decker jumps off, grabs onto copter & manages to hack into it & blow up other copter before the rammed one's toast.  We then fly off, trying to find a place to lay low (and hide a giant white penis the shaman now refuses to give up).Then we hear the news feeds next day:  "Looking for human, troll, etcc....Armed & Dangerous.... Reward for return of art objects.... last seen flying towards downtown Seattle on a giant flying bone white penis....anyone seeing these fugitives are encouraged......"Yep.  After you've ridden a giant penis through Seattle's downtown, blowing up police copters, everything else is a let down.</blockquote>

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